Search

The Wolf of Wall Street (2013): The Restaurant Scene | Transcript

Seasoned Wall Street broker Mark Hanna (Matthew McConaughey) lays down the law of the financial jungle to newcomer Jordan (Leonardo DiCaprio), his latest protégé.
The Wolf of Wall Street (2013): The Restaurant Scene

CLASSIC SCENE

The Wolf of Wall Street (2013)
Directed by Martin Scorsese

In a sleek, upscale bar, seasoned Wall Street broker Mark Hanna (Matthew McConaughey) lays down the law of the financial jungle to newcomer Jordan (Leonardo DiCaprio), his latest protégé. As they sit surrounded by the clatter of a bustling afternoon, Mark orders a steady flow of martinis, setting a rhythm for their conversation. He casually discards any pretense of morality or client loyalty, advocating a relentless pursuit of profit through whatever means necessary, including exploiting the addictive cycle of trading. His advice ranges from personal habits to professional strategies, emphasizing the illusory nature of the market—a merciless, unvarnished induction into the ethos that drives the financial elite. Mark’s brutal honesty about the necessity of personal vices like masturbation and cocaine to maintain performance underscores the debauched reality of his world, leaving Jordan both intrigued and apprehensive about his future on Wall Street.

* * *

(MARK HUMMING)

MARK: Yeah.

(CONTINUES HUMMING)

MARK: Tootski?

JORDAN: Oh, no. Thank you, though.

HECTOR: Mr. Hanna, what can I bring for you on this glorious afternoon?

MARK: Well, Hector, here’s the game plan. You’re gonna bring us two Absolut Martinis. You know howl like them. Straight up. And then precisely seven and one half minutes after that, you’re gonna bring us two more. Then two more after that every five minutes until one of us passes the fuck out.

(JORDAN CHUCKLES)

HECTOR: Excellent strategy, Sir.

JORDAN: I’m good with water for now. Thank you.

MARK: It’s his first day on Wall Street. Give him time. Thank you.

JORDAN: Thank you. Mr. Hanna? You’re able to do drugs during the day and then still function, still do your job?

MARK: How the fuck else would you do this job? Cocaine and hookers, my friend.

JORDAN: Right. (CHUCKLES) Well, I got to say, I’m incredibly excited to be a part of your firm. I mean… The clients you have are absolutely…

MARK: Fuck the clients. Your only responsibility is to put meat on the table. You got a girlfriend?

JORDAN: I’m married. I have a wife. Her name is Teresa. She cuts hair.

MARK: Congratulations.

JORDAN: Thank you.

MARK: Think about Teresa. Name of the game. Move the money from your client’s pocket into your pocket.

JORDAN: Right. But if you make your clients money at the same time, it’s advantageous to everyone. Correct?

MARK: No. Number one rule of Wall Street. Nobody… I don’t care if you’re Warren Buffett or if you’re Jimmy Buffett. Nobody knows if a stock is gonna go up, down, sideways, or in fucking circles. Least of all stockbrokers, right?

JORDAN: Mmm-hmm.

MARK: It’s all a fugazi. You know what a fugazi is?

JORDAN: Uh. Fugayzi. It’s a fake.

MARK: Fugayzi, fugazi, it’s a whazy, it’s a woozy, it’s… (WHISTLES) Fairy dust. It doesn’t exist. It’s never landed. It is no matter. It’s not on the elemental chart. It’s not fucking real. Right?

JORDAN: Right.

MARK: Stay with me.

JORDAN: Mmm-hmm.

MARK: We don’t create shit. We don’t build anything.

JORDAN: No.

MARK: So if you got a client who bought stock at 8 and it now sits at 16, he’s all fucking happy. He wants to cash in, liquidate, take his fucking money and run home. You don’t let him do that.

JORDAN: Okay.

MARK: ‘Cause that would make it real.

JORDAN: Right.

MARK: No. What do you do? You get another brilliant idea. A special idea. Another “situation.” Another stock to reinvest his earnings and then some. And he will, every single time. ‘Cause they’re fucking addicted. And you just keep doing this, again and again and again. Meanwhile, he thinks he’s getting shit rich, which he is, on paper. But you and me, the brokers, we’re taking home cold hard cash via commission, motherfucker.

JORDAN: Right. That’s incredible, Sir. I can’t tell you how excited I am.

MARK: You should be. There’s two keys to success in the broker business. First of all… (EXHALES) You gotta stay relaxed.

JORDAN: Yeah.

MARK: Do you jerk off?

JORDAN: Do I… Do I jerk off? Yeah. Yeah, I jerk off. Yeah.

MARK: How many times a week?

JORDAN: Like, um, three or four. Three or four times, maybe five.

MARK: Gotta pump those numbers up. Those are rookie numbers in this racket. I myself, I jerk off at least twice a day.

JORDAN: Wow.

MARK: Once in the morning right after I work out, then once right after lunch.

JORDAN: Really?

MARK: Mmm-hmm. I want to. That’s not why I do it. I do it ’cause I fucking need to. Think about it. You’re dealing with numbers. All day long, decimal points, high frequencies. Bang, bang, bang. (SQUEAKING) Fucking digits. All very acidic above-the-shoulders mustard shit. All right?

JORDAN: Mmm-hmm.

MARK: It kind of wigs some people out.

JORDAN: Mmm-hmm.

MARK: Right. You got to feed the geese to keep the blood flowing.

JORDAN: Mmm-hmm.

MARK: I keep the rhythm below the belt.

JORDAN: Done.

MARK: This is not a tip, this is a prescription. Trust me.

JORDAN: Mmm-hmm.

MARK: If you don’t, you will fall out of balance, split your differential and tip the fuck over. Or worse yet, I’ve seen this happen, implode.

JORDAN: No, I don’t want to implode, Sir.

MARK: No. No, you don’t.

JORDAN: I’m in it for the long run, you know?

MARK: Implosions are ugly.

JORDAN: Yeah.

MARK: Pop off to the bathroom, work one out any time you can. When you get really good at it, you’ll fucking be stroking it and you’ll be thinking about money. Second key to success in this racket is this little baby right here. It’s called cocaine.

JORDAN: Right.

MARK: It’ll keep you sharp between the ears. It’ll also help your fingers dial faster. And guess what? That’s good for me. Yes, Sir. Revolutions. You follow?

JORDAN: Revolutions.

MARK: Keep the clients on the Ferris wheel. And it goes. The park is open 24/7, 365, every decade, every goddamn century. That’s it.

(JORDAN LAUGHING)

MARK: The name of the game. Halkidiki?

JORDAN: Hmm. Thank you.

(MARK HUMMING)

MARK: Come on.

(BOTH HUMMING)

MARK: We’re the common denominator. Ah.

BOTH: Ah.

MARK: Keep it up for me.

(SINGING) You’ve seen the echo.

And the money comes in.

The parade comes to town.

Going down Broadway.

It’s a one-way street.

Whichever way I go

(HUMMING CONTINUES)

SHARE THIS ARTICLE

Leave a Comment

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *

Read More

The Listener (2022)

The Listener (2022) | Transcript

Follows a helpline volunteer who is part of the small army that gets on the phone every night, fielding calls from all kinds of people feeling lonely, broken, etc.

Shrek (2001)

Shrek (2001) | Transcript

A mean lord exiles fairytale creatures to the swamp of a grumpy ogre, who must go on a quest and rescue a princess for the lord in order to get his land back.

Mad Max: Fury Road (2015) | Transcript

In a post-apocalyptic wasteland, a woman rebels against a tyrannical ruler in search for her homeland with the aid of a group of female prisoners, a psychotic worshiper and a drifter named Max.

Weekly Magazine

Get the best articles once a week directly to your inbox!