Young Sheldon
Season 7 Episode 13
Episode title: Funeral
Original air date: May 16, 2024 (CBS)
Plot: As the family prepares for George’s funeral, expressing their grief in different ways, Sheldon imagines alternate timelines featuring a variety of things he could have said to George during the last time his father left the house for work, rather than keeping silent and ignoring George as he usually did. At the funeral, several characters deliver eulogies for George. Georgie reflects on how his father always supported him no matter how he behaved. Connie makes humorous references to George’s eating and drinking habits while remarking that how, despite her initial disapproval of Mary’s decision to pursue a relationship with him, she grew to love him as a son. Mary tearfully vents her anger about George leaving behind the family. Finally, Sheldon visualizes himself giving a powerfully moving speech on everything he wishes he could have said had he known George was about to die. The adult Sheldon, now comfortable saying what he wanted to say in the past, narrates that he loved his father and will always miss him.
* * *
ADULT SHELDON: I wasn’t always as emotionally intelligent as I am today. For example, when my father died, I was flummoxed by all the different ways people expressed grief. My mother threw herself into religion. My meemaw turned to a different kind of spirit. My brother tried to fill the vacuum created by my father’s passing.
$3,500? You do realize we’re talking about the beloved head coach of a winning football team? There’s an argument…
ADULT SHELDON: And then there’s all the friends and neighbors who expressed their grief with food.
I made you a casserole.
I made you a casserole.
I made you a casserole.
I bought you a casserole.
ADULT SHELDON: And of course, I thought about Star Trek II: The Wrath of Khan…
I have been, and always shall be, your friend.
…and how upset I was over the death of Spock.
Live long… and prosper.
What are you doing? Thinking about Star Trek.
What is wrong with you? Our dad just died.
ADULT SHELDON: And some people express their grief by lashing out.
If there’s any pictures of George you’d like to display at the ceremony, I’ll need to get those.
Oh, um…
Don’t worry, Mom, I’ll take care of it.
Did George have a favorite hymn or song that might be played?
He did always play “Born to Be Wild” when the team ran out on the field.
Not sure our organist knows that one.
I can bring a boom box.
We’ll call that plan B.
GEORGE SR.: What’s happening?
MARY: We are leaving for the bluebonnet picture at 4:00.
Don’t be late.
Wouldn’t miss it.
You want a ride to school?
Nah, I’ll take the bus.
Suit yourself. See y’all later.
4:00.
See y’all later.
4:00.
YOUNG SHELDON: Dad, wait.
Yeah?
YOUNG SHELDON: I have been, and always shall be, your friend.
Live long and prosper.
See y’all later.
4:00.
YOUNG SHELDON: Dad, wait.
Yeah?
YOUNG SHELDON: Bye.
Bye, son.
MARY: Shelly? You okay?
He’s probably thinking about stupid Star Trek stuff.
YOUNG SHELDON: I was thinking about alternate realities branching off from a single decision point. Only one of them was about Star Trek.
We’re talking about Dad’s funeral. Why don’t you care?
YOUNG SHELDON: The details of the funeral are irrelevant. They won’t change anything.
I can’t wait for yours.
Hey, that’s enough out of you two.
You’re not Dad. You don’t tell us what to do.
Well, I will, and that’s enough!
It’s okay. It’s healthy for everyone to let their feelings out.
Oh, shut up, Jeff.
Missy! Go to your room.
How about I just go?
(sighs)
(door opens, closes)
I’m sorry about her.
No need to apologize.
Now, which of you might…
See y’all later.
4:00.
YOUNG SHELDON: Dad, wait.
Yeah?
YOUNG SHELDON: I love you.
I love you, too, son.
Hey, Missy.
Hey.
I brought you food.
Thanks, but I’m not hungry.
I’m real sorry. Your dad was always nice to me.
He liked you.
Now you and I have something in common.
What’s that?
My dad’s gone, too.
Your dad’s in New Jersey.
Yeah, but he’s not coming back.
Sorry.
Want a hug?
No.
Want a kiss?
No.
Yeah, me neither.
(“Dreams” by The Cranberries playing on television)
How you doing, sweetheart?
All right.
♪ Impossible not to do, impossible… ♪
What the hell are you doing?
Sitting?
Not there.
Oh, I’m sorry.
Gosh.
Here okay?
(scoffs)
♪ Totally amazing mind… ♪
YOUNG SHELDON: That’s my spot.
Oh, sorry. Here, have a seat.
YOUNG SHELDON: I don’t want to sit there, that’s just my spot.
(sighs)
Hey, Mary.
Hi, Wayne. Come on in.
I cleaned out George’s desk. Uh, thought you might like his stuff.
Thanks.
I just wanted you to know that if there’s anything that you or the kids need… (crying): …I’m here for y’all.
Oh, Wayne.
I mean it. Anything that you need.
Thank you. I appreciate that.
(sobs)
You doing okay?
Oh, yeah, yeah. Don’t worry about me. (sobs)
Okay. Let me get you a tissue.
Okay, okay.
(suppressing sobs) I just miss him, you know? (blows nose)
I do.
I used to… I used to mess with him by telling him he was my best white friend, you know. But… but the truth is that he was my best friend.
And you were his.
Oh, that’s nice to know.
I’m not helping, am I?
That’s okay. Are you hungry? We’ve got lots of food.
Yeah, I-I could eat.
Hope you like casserole.
I do like casserole.
♪ ♪
ADULT SHELDON: Eventually I realized there was a better way to deal with grief: avoid it completely.
Sheldon.
YOUNG SHELDON: Oh, hello.
I just wanted to tell you how sorry…
YOUNG SHELDON: No, thank you.
Well, if there’s anything you need…
YOUNG SHELDON: Nope.
I’m here to pick up a suit for Cooper.
Oh, sure.
George Cooper?
Yes, ma’am.
Looks a little big for you.
(chuckles) It’s my dad’s.
Nice of you to pick it up for him. That’ll be eight dollars.
(sighs)
What you doing?
Trying to write my speech for the funeral.
Mmm. Not easy, is it?
No. Where’s Dale?
Oh, he was wandering around, afraid to sit anywhere, so I sent him home. Anyway, you want to read me what you got?
(exhales): Uh… (sighs) George was a good husband, a good father and a good coach.
Keep going.
No, that’s all I got.
Oh. Short and sweet. Leave ’em wanting more.
I don’t know how to do this.
Oh, honey, why would you?
How did you get through Dad’s funeral?
You’re gonna think less of me.
I won’t.
I drank tequila and smoked a marijuana cigarette.
Oh, Mom.
Don’t knock it till you try it.
I’ll have you know that I took a couple of puffs my senior year of high school.
The devil’s lettuce?
George gave it to me.
I knew he was a bad influence. (laughs)
It was the night before he shipped out to Vietnam. And we snuck into my bedroom and we… you know.
Mary Tucker.
(chuckles)
I wanted to make sure he knew what he was fighting for.
See, that’s a story you should tell at the service.
In my church, in front of my children?
It’s patriotic.
I can’t help feeling like something’s wrong with me.
What are you talking about?
(sighs) I know it doesn’t make sense, but… I am mad at him for leaving me.
Yeah, I get that.
You do?
I was mad at your daddy when he passed.
How did you get over it?
Time. And Dale helps. Don’t tell him, please.
(chuckles) I’m happy you found each other.
You’re still young, honey.
No. (clears throat) That’s it for me. I’m done.
I’ll leave you to it.
Thanks.
And listen, if you can’t think of anything complimentary to say, just make stuff up. Nobody’s gonna call you on it.
Sheldon will.
Yeah. Sheldon will. (laughs)
GEORGE SR.: You want a ride to school?
MISSY: Nah, I’ll take the bus.
GEORGE SR.: Suit yourself. See y’all later.
4:00.
YOUNG SHELDON: Dad, wait.
Yeah?
YOUNG SHELDON: Can I go with you?
Sure. Maybe we could play some of them car games you love on the way.
YOUNG SHELDON: I’d like that.
(organ playing)
Mary. We’re so sorry.
Thank you.
Well, I didn’t know him long, but, uh, I loved that guy.
He felt like y’all were long-lost friends.
(voice breaking): Oh, here we go.
Come on, let’s get you some Kleenex.
Aren’t y’all sweet to come?
Of course.
I saw Sheldon the other day. He wouldn’t speak to me. Is he okay?
He’s not really talking to anybody.
We’ll keep him company.
I’ll, uh, try to distract him by telling him the latest news about leptons.
He’ll like that. He’s crazy about the leptons.
Who isn’t?
(chuckles)
How’d you know George?
Next-door neighbor.
Oh. So, you knew him well?
A little. How about you?
I taught Sheldon science.
Oh, I’m sorry.
Thank you.
I’m single.
Same.
Mm-hmm.
Missy, if you want a minute with Dad before they close the casket, now’s the time. It’s okay if you don’t.
I have to.
GEORGE SR.: Here, let me help you with that.
Okay.
Holy moly.
It’s good, huh?
Unbelievable.
I’ll leave you to it.
No, sit with me.
Okay.
(crying): Thank you for that. Thank you for everything. I love you. (sniffles)
You don’t need to worry. I’ve got everything under control. (breathes deeply) Won’t let you down, Dad. (sniffles)
Sheldon, they’re gonna close the casket. If you want to say goodbye to your dad…
You really didn’t want to take that family portrait, did you? See you later. (cries)
When I quit the football team, I thought my dad was gonna kill me. And then, when I quit high school, I really thought he was gonna kill me. Then, when I got my girlfriend pregnant… I was sure he was gonna kill me. But as you can see, he didn’t. No matter what I did, he always had my back. I love you, Dad.
And now George’s loving wife Mary would like to say a few words. Mary.
MARY: Thank you, Pastor Jeff. Um… (clears throat) (breathes deeply) I met George in high school. Well, I was in high school. He was an older man with a motorcycle.
(light laughter)
I’d like to tell you he caught my eye, but actually it was the motorcycle.
(laughter)
(voice breaking): I’m sorry, I can’t… do this. I am… so angry. (sighs) George and I had our ups and downs, but we were finally in such a good place, and then he… left. (crying): He left all of us. How-how could you do that? I am so mad at him. I’m mad at God, I’m mad at myself for not trying harder while he was here. This wasn’t supposed to happen. (crying)
Okay. Oh.
Thank you, thank you, darling, thank you. Jeff, could you…?
Very heartfelt. I know this is hard for everyone. It’s certainly hard for me. But no one… is more upset with George’s passing than the Lone Star Beer company. That flag is at half-mast.
(laughter)
On the other hand, there’s a lot of cows out there that are breathing a sigh of relief. As the king of brisket has put down his fork and ridden off into the sunset.
(laughter)
And, uh, I’ll tell you something…
Why are they laughing at Dad?
‘Cause they love him.
…that I always kind of kept to myself, but… I wasn’t always a big supporter of George and Mary being an item. As a matter of fact, whenever he came to visit, I would always invite Mary’s slutty friend Janice over, hoping to catch his interest.
(laughter)
Hey, Janice. Thanks for coming. You’re a doll. Anyway… George only had eyes for Mary. And of course brisket.
(laughter)
And over the years, he surely earned my respect.
♪ ♪
He was a good man (voice breaking): And I will always be proud… to call him my son.
(crying)
Okay.
Okay. Uh, what Wayne here is trying to say, uh, is, uh, George was a hell of a coach. He was a hell of a friend. And we’re gonna miss him a hell of a lot.
Thank you.
Before our final prayer, would anyone else like to say a few words?
Missy?
(mouths)
Shelly?
(clears throat)
YOUNG SHELDON: I’ve been thinking a lot about the last moments I had with my dad. It was morning, and he was leaving for work. He said, “See y’all later.” And I said nothing. I regret that. I could have said “Bye” or asked him for a ride. Or told him that I loved him. But I didn’t. I barely noticed he left. So many times that I didn’t notice my father. I hope he knew how much I loved him.
ADULT SHELDON: I wish I could tell you I said all those things. But I didn’t.
Shelly?
Let’s bow our heads in prayer.
ALL: Our Father, who is in heaven, hallowed be Your name…
ADULT SHELDON: For a long time, I focused on my father’s shortcomings. Now that I’m his age and have kids of my own, I realize he was just a person doing the best he could, and he did a lot. I didn’t say it at his funeral, but I can say it now. I loved my father. I will miss him forever.
