The Stand – S01E03 – Blank Pages [Transcript]

Flagg communicates with Nick and Nadine, and sends a message to Abigail and the Committee
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The Stand - S01E03 - Blank Pages

Release date: December 31, 2020

As a child, Nadine used a planchette and contacted Flagg who promised to make her his queen. After Captain Trips, Nadine discovers Joe and the two of them run into Larry who has been following messages left behind by Harold. He reluctantly brings them along with him and he bonds with Joe. Stu encounters Frannie and Harold with the latter distrustful of him. He parts ways with them and meets Glen Bateman who has painted Mother Abagail, whom the two of them have had visions of, as well as a very pregnant Frannie. Nick Andros, a deaf-mute temp worker, is attacked in a bar and loses his eye. Flagg beckons him, but he resists and instead follows Mother Abigail’s directions. Later, he meets Tom Cullen, a man with learning disabilities. Months later, Heck Drogan escapes Las Vegas and ends up in Boulder where Mother Abagail and her committee (consisting of Stu, Frannie, Larry, Ray, Glen and Nick) learn that he is a messenger from Flagg; warning them of his impending rise. Nadine uses the planchette again to contact Flagg who orders her to kill Mother Abagail and the committee by seducing Harold.

* * *

[through headphones]: ♪ This is how we do it ♪

♪ This is how we do it ♪

♪ La la la la now ♪

[singer vocalizing]

♪ This is how we do it… ♪

Miss Lacy says this is devil stuff.

Miss Lacy smells like onion soup.

Everybody put their fingertips on the planchette.

What’s a plan-check?

Planchette. It’s French.

It’s evil.

Will you just put your hands on this thing?

Man…

You, too, new girl. The more people we have, the more energy we put out, so…

Spirits, the door is open.

[laughing]

Aren’t you supposed to say something more?

The way I was taught is all we do is open the door, and then it’s up to the spirits if they want to come through.

JESSE: I don’t know.

I really feel like you’re supposed to say something more.

B!tch, you ain’t slick.

It’s not me. I swear.

Seriously, stop playing.

It’s saying it’s the new girl.

It’s the spirits.

AMANDA: Turns out this isyou, new girl, I’ll beat your ass.

New girl, tell me that you did not just write your f*cking name.

I swear, I wasn’t… I didn’t…

I warned you not to…

I can’t take my hands off it.

[girls shriek]

♪ This is how we do it.♪

[screaming]

[panicked shouting]

[growling]

What is that?!

VOICE [indistinct]: Nadine. Nadine…

[screaming]

“Nadine… Queen.”

[gunshot]

[gasps]

[panting]

[birds singing]

[distant gunshots]

[crow cawing]

I don’t get it, man. I put the crosshairs just behind the front shoulder, like you said.

You’re jerking the trigger.

Hey, man, “Squeeze, don’t pull.”

That’s right.

You sound like…

Hey, you relax…

You know, you sound like some kind of cowboy fortune cookie, right?

Cowboy fortune cookie? That’s interesting.

Yeah. Whoa.

Hey. Psst, Stu.

[door opens]

He’s still breathing. Help me get him out.

[straining]: Oh, shit. Come on.

Okay.

STU: Jesus Christ.

Wouldn’t that be nice?

Someone crucified this man, Larry.

We gotta get him to town.

You think he’s gonna make it?

Hell, he’s made it this far.

Hey, whoa, whoa, whoa. Hey.

Hey, listen. Listen to me. Listen.

You’re all right.

[grunts]

Hey, look at me. Look at me.

We’re gonna get you to a doctor. Okay?

He said I couldn’t be forgiven…

…until…until I delivered the message.

What message?

He’s coming.

♪ I can taste something bitter ♪

♪ In the sweetness ♪

♪ There’s an aching in my lungs ♪

♪ ‘Cause I’m not breathing ♪

♪ I break myself to pieces, test my patience ♪

♪ Craving just a little validation ♪

♪ When will I start feeling like I’m good enough for you? ♪

♪ Only happy if you’re happy for me ♪

♪ Dying every second you ignore me ♪

♪ Now all my self-worth depends on you ♪

♪ When did I become so desperate? ♪

♪ When did I become so insecure? ♪

♪ How much longer can I do this for, do this for? ♪

Come on, sleepyhead.

We don’t want to be late for our first day of school.

[Joe’s screams echoing]

NADINE: Joe! Joe!

Joe!

Hey, hey, hey, hey.

Joe, no. Stop. You’re gonna hurt him.

[Joe crying out]

NADINE: You’re gonna hurt him. Stop!

I’d be happy to stop, just tell him to drop the f*cking knife.

[Joe screaming]

Let it go.

Joe, let it go.

Let it go.

Nadine Cross.

And this is Joe.

So this’ll be your classroom here.

Uh, I’ve had my whole crew in here since yesterday, actually, sweeping the whole place, the whole wing.

Make sure there aren’t any, uh, pieces left behind, you know.

So just rest assured this is gonna just fit every need that you have.

So what-what are– what are you gonna teach, anyway?

Teach? [laughs] Honestly, I’m just trying to give these kids a little sense of normalcy, you know.

Keep ’em from shutting down.

All they’ve seen, it’s a miracle they remember how to breathe in and out.

NADINE: I found him outside of Scranton several weeks ago.

He’s just a… a scared little boy.

Look, we want to come with you.

Come with me where?

Wherever you’re going.

You know, I got out of New York with a woman, and she killed herself.

So, maybe I’m meant to be alone.

Sorry.

You asked me where I’m going.

Um… [sniffs]

…I’m going wherever Harold leads me.

I don’t– I don’t get it.

You know him?

No.

But every time I pass through a place that, uh, he’s already been, I just felt like he knew the answers before I even thought to ask the questions.

I want to go with you.

I need your help.

And so does Joe.

You just gotta figure out if you’d rather be alone.

WEIZAK: Hawk, got another one for you.

Joe, come on.

HAROLD: Hi, Joe.

NADINE: Well… [chuckles]

Joe, come here. Come here. Come on.

Let’s just say thank you, let them finish up.

Yeah? Okay. [chuckles]

Well…

WEIZAK [chuckles]: Hey.

Thanks for coming on over.

It’s nice to meet you.

NADINE: Bye. Thank you both…

Thank you.

…so much.

Uh, it’s good that you came.

WEIZAK: Uh…

Goodbye. Come on.

All right, you have a nice rest of your day.

[grunts, laughs]

Ah.

She may be the hottest woman on Earth.

I mean, left.

That’s, uh, that’s f*cked up.

Before, I see that woman, I say to myself, “You wouldn’t have a shot with her if you were the last man on Earth.”

And now…

[fingers snap]

…here I am, a lot closer to being the last man on Earth than I ever imagined.

And you still don’t have a shot with her.

[sighs] Steve, did you move my goo?

STEVE: Think fast.

[grunts]

[clatters]

Thanks.

[chuckles]

By the way, I’ve asked Steve to assist with your delivery.

Wasn’t he a veterinary technician?

Beggars and choosers, I’m afraid.

Bet he’s assisted more births than I have.

Not human births.

Mammalian.

Okay…

Ooh. Yeah.

Cold? Okay.

WEN: Here goes nothing.

FRANNIE: That’s not the baby, is it?

Pretty sure that’s your bladder.

Uh-huh.

Just reposition…

Oh…

WEN: There’s your baby.

Oh, my God.

Is it healthy?

Far as I can tell, yeah.

Sorry.

All good.

Hey, Jess, meet our kid.

[sputtering, coughing]

HAROLD: Frannie?

Yeah?

I’ll be right back.

Okay.

[unzips]

STU: Well, that’s one good thing about the end of the world.

[shouts]

We can piss wherever we want, right?

[chuckles] Hi, there.

I was waiting to introduce myself till you set that rifle down.

That’s not my only gun.

I know.

You also got that little automatic in your ankle holster.

How long have you been following us?

Long enough to pick my moment.

Hello, there.

What about you? Is that, is that the only thing you’re carrying, that rifle?

Hey, how about we start over?

I was hoping this would be a nicer conversation.

It’s been a while since I had one.

Uh, Stu Redman.

Pleasure to meet you both.

Now, look… [stammers]

[chuckles] I mean, i-if I was gonna hurt either one of you, why wouldn’t I have done it with your backs turned?

I can’t think of a reason.

Doesn’t mean there isn’t one.

It’s a sick f*cking world.

FRANNIE: I’m Fran Goldsmith.

That’s Harold Lauder.

Fran!

Harold, if we didn’t want people to know our names, why are we spray-painting it across the country?

STU: She’s got a point there, Harold, I…

It’s how I was keeping track of you.

Nice to meet you, Mr. Redman. Best of luck.

FRANNIE: What are you doing?

Let’s go. Let’s go.

Harold,

We don’t, w-we can’t be 100% sure that this guy is okay.

And if we can’t be 100% sure…

You can’t be 100% sure of anyone.

Harold, are we really gonna send away the first person that we’ve seen?

Come on. If we’re not out here looking for people, then what the f*ck are we…

Look, we can, we can argue about it all you want, I’m not taking a chance.

So now you’ve got a choice: either you stay with the guy who’s helped you stay alive these last couple weeks, saved your life in Ogunquit, or…

you can throw in with this happy asshole and his f*cking dimples, with no way to know for sure that he’s not Jeffrey Dahmer.

Think he likes me.

Sorry.

Oh, no, it’s all right.

He’s just looking out for you, that’s all.

We’re looking out for each other.

Yeah.

We’re gonna go to Atlanta, to the CDC.

Think that’s a mistake?

Uh, well, I heard it was compromised.

Yeah.

And Harold says that’s just what they’re telling people, so not too many people show up.

Well, look, Atlanta’s as good a place as any.

Good to get south before the winter hits.

Yep.

Good to just have a destination. [chuckles]

You know what I mean?

What are you gonna do?

I was gonna head west.

The Pacific. L.A., maybe? Uh…

San Diego?

Good luck.

You take care of yourself, Fran Goldsmith.

See you around, Stu.

Do you think that one immune parent is enough to pass the immunity down?

STU: Hey, we need help!

Hey, you. Get the door. Get the door.

Watch it, watch it, watch it. Watch his head.

We need some help, stat!

LARRY: Doc, this guy’s in pretty bad shape.

Put him down on this.

What’s wrong with him?

You’ll see.

WEN: Oh, my God.

We found him on the highway.

WEN: Okay, all right.

Get him to the far one.

WEN: Here, help me put him on the bed.

And lift. [grunts]

Watch his head.

[indistinct conversation]

STEVE: Got it.

WEN: Steve, get me two IV bags.

STU: How did you know that?

Come here.

Are you telling me that Mother Abagail knew he was coming?

Nick, come on, you got to help me out here.

Somebody nailed that man to a cross.

Somebody who knew how, between the bones of the forearm.

Okay? Not the palm.

Now can you tell me who did that?

♪ Under lights, under night there’s a war going on ♪

♪ And it won’t be settled till there’s blood on the floor ♪

♪ It’s a trial, it’s a test ♪

[woman coughing]

♪ Territorial mess ♪

♪ She’s the prize but she’s looking… ♪

Shit.

♪ So hot ♪

Hey!

♪ Don’t stop… ♪

You owe me a beer.

WAITRESS: Here you go, shug.

♪ Oh, she never do it slow ♪

♪ She got a lot of soul… ♪

BOOTH: I’m talking to y–

[low, muffled sound]

[people cheering]

Get up!

[low, muffled sound]

[heart beating]

♪ She’s watching from the side ♪

♪ She love to see a fight, says ♪

♪ I only want the last man standing. ♪

[upbeat, jazzy music playing]

FLAGG: Nick.

Welcome.

♪ You’ll ♪

♪ Never get away from me… ♪

For you.

♪ You can climb the tallest tree… ♪

Oof.

Seems to me you got dealt a real shit hand, my friend.

Mom came up from where, El Salvador?

Crossed the border in the trunk of a car to give her child the life she never had.

And instead, you end up deaf and broke, pounding the pavement looking for day work.

Well, here’s my offer, son.

I want to make you my right-hand man, give you anything you want, more than your dear departed madre ever could’ve dreamed.

I already made it so you can hear.

[echoes]: I can give you a voice, too.

FLAGG: Well, what about your eye?

Man can’t hear, can’t talk, I’d imagine his eyes become his whole world.

[chimes]

You’re about to find out.

But I can fix you, Nicky boy.

And all I ask in return is for you to worship the ground I walk on.

[thuds]

[laughs softly]

[birds cawing]

[cawing echoes]

[insects buzzing]

[dish clatters]

[bell chiming]

[thunks]

Hey! In here!

[dishes clattering]

Who’s out there?!

[Booth coughing]

Thank Christ.

I was just about…

[wheezing]

I know why you’re here.

Came to finish me off.

Come on, then!

Don’t leave me here, you coward!

[bird cawing]

[panting]

Hey.

Hey. Hey, boy.

GLEN: Kojak!

Kojak? Come on, man.

Hey…

He’s friendly, I promise.

No-no reason to shoot him.

Please don’t shoot him with your gun.

Or-or me, either, while we’re on the subject.

Ain’t nobody shooting nobody.

I’m glad to hear it.

Glen Bateman, at your service.

That’s Kojak.

Stu Redman.

You’re a Southerner.

Yeah. East Texas.

Easterner.

Easterner. All right.

Could hear it. Hey, hey.

Do you like caviar?

Cavi-what?

Mmm.

Huh?

That’s damn good.

Yeah.

I needed that.

That is excellent.

Here, try this.

What’s that?

Caviar. Ohio’s finest.

Caviar.

[chuckles]

All right, this’ll be a first for me. [chuckles]

Thank you for all this. This is, uh, above and beyond.

And really cozy.

The generator was, uh, the wife’s idea.

Oh, yeah?

Yeah. Oh, no, no, no.

Bett– uh, better with these.

My wife didn’t like potato chips.

Can you imagine somebody not liking a f*cking potato chip?

So, your wife was a professor, too?

Yeah, physicist.

Hard science.

She died ten years ago.

Yeah, ten years in August.

Mm.

Hard to imagine anybody dying of anything else.

But they did.

[sniffles]

Your wife?

Year ago.

Guy ran a stop sign.

Kids?

No, uh, no, we never really got around to it.

What about you?

Never saw the point of the little f*ckers.

[laughs]

[“Do It Again” by Steely Dan begins]

You don’t talk much, do you, East Texas?

Something tells me that ain’t gonna be a problem.

[both laugh]

Fair enough. Well, hell, I haven’t had anybody to talk to other than myself and my… my old buddy, Kojak over there… Hey, speaking of which, have-have you seen many dogs?

Haven’t even heard one bark.

Take it he wasn’t yours before this whole thing went down?

That would be quite a coincidence.

No, no, no.

What I gathered from the news, back when there was news… Captain Trips hit dogs as bad as it hit people.

Yep, dogs… horses… guinea pigs.

Yeah, yeah, and-and yet, uh, deer!

Yeah, deer.

Sons of b!tches are everywhere.

Everywhere.

What… what’s up with that?

And rats.

What sort of horseshit Judgment Day spares the rats?

Is that what you think this is?

Really, you think this is Judgment Day?

“Show me a man or a woman alone and I’ll show you a saint. Give me two and they’ll fall in love. Give me three, they’ll create a charming little thing called society.”

It’s true, you need a society to build buildings and golf courses and… towns and… steeples and create the Internet, everything else!

But the other stuff society gives you– let’s think about that, East Texas– outcasts, prejudice, competition?

You can keep the rest of that crap for yourself.

And you don’t feel the slightest obligation to get things back up and running?

“Up and running” is what got us here.

I think it’s high time we tried down and standing still.

[clucks tongue]

♪ You go back, Jack, do it again. ♪

[insects trilling]

Well, Nick Andros.

It is good to see you.

Come on in, come in.

Oh, Nick, now… you don’t need to sign here.

You can talk.

Try.

How you doing

with the Dark Man?

He scares me.

Yes, he should.

He should.

He’s scary as pee.

And I don’t mind the Lord hearing me say it.

[soft chuckle]

Who are you?

My name is Abagail Freemantle.

Some folks call me Mother Abagail, because I’m the oldest person that anyone knows.

No, I mean… who are you?

Oh.

I’m an old woman who the Lord has chosen to talk to.

Now, it would not have been my choice, but no one asked me.

Well, I don’t believe in God.

That’s all right.

God believes in you.

And He’s got a job for you.

He wants you to be my voice.

“Voice”?

Lady… this world has never been interested in anything I have to offer.

And I can’t imagine that’s changed now.

Oh, but it has, Nick.

You see, the world is now a blank page.

And unless we’re all working together, we’re not going to be able to rewrite it.

So I need you to come find me.

How do I find you?

Just ask for me.

I’m at Hemingford Home…

spelled M-O-O-N.

Should anyone ask.

Holy geez, mister!

What happened to your eye?

[sputters] My name is Tom Cullen.

I’m 42 years old and developmentally disabled.

Please do not be alarmed by my behavior, for I have difficulty reading social cues.

If you find my behavior inappropriate to the situation, please tell me, and I will endeavor to change.

I am a hard worker, very strong, and capable of basic physical labor.

I cannot read, but I can follow simple direction.

If you know of employment opportunities, please contact Miss Sykes at the Center for Handicapable Workers–

What’s the matter, mister?

Wha–

You know, you sure are quiet.

M-O-O-N, that spells “quiet.”

Did I forget to tell you I can’t read?

Sometimes I do. It’s a lot to remember.

[exhales noisily]

My name is Tom Cullen.

I’m 42 years old… Yeah.

There’s two of you.

Your head’s hurting.

Well, my laws, it must be.

You must have took a tumble, didn’t you?

My laws.

I hit my head one time falling off of Grandma’s roof.

M-O-O-N, and that spells ouch.

Aw, sorry about your friend.

Plus, I hurt it one other time, when I was too young to remember.

The skull doesn’t fully mesh until you’re two years old.

It lets the brain grow, but it makes the bones really easy to break.

You know, mister… it sure would be easier if you’d just say what’s on your mind instead of acting like you can’t talk.

My laws. My laws!

Well, can you hear at least?

Can you hear Tom Cullen?

Oh…

I wonder why she didn’t tell me.

Nice old Black lady from inside my head.

[no sound]

Mother Abagail.

Oh, she’s the one who told me where to find you.

What’s the matter, mister? Did I remember to tell you I have difficulty reading social cues?

[exhales noisily] My name is Tom Cullen.

I’m 42 years old and developmentally disabled.

Please do not be alarmed by my behavior, for I have difficulty reading social cues.

If you find my behavior inappropriate to the situation, just tell me.

[Larry strumming guitar]

♪ Sacrificing my dreams ♪

♪ Do you know what it means? ♪

♪ Baby, can you dig your man? ♪

♪ Do you know what it means? ♪

[whispering]: Larry.

Psst.

What up?

What’s up, little man? Did you like it?

Come here. Check this out.

[playing mid-tempo blues riff]

You want to try it?

Go on, Joe. Give it a try.

Come on.

[playing same blues riff extremely well]

Hey. [chuckles]

I think we got a ringer on our hands.

[laughs]

Wow. Joe…

Somebody’s had lessons.

[laughs]

[laughing, clapping]

LARRY: It hurts, right?

You just need to practice and build up a callus.

I could show you if you want. Okay.

It’s all good. You– It’s all yours, man.

Just let me know when you want to jam.

[scoffs]

Glen.

Hey. Hey, buddy, wake up.

Hey, look. Look at me.

Look at me. Hey. This painting.

Tell me about it.

This is the most vivid dream I ever had.

[clears throat] Yeah.

Just figured I’d put it down on canvas best I could.

Who’s the woman in it?

Huh?

Who is she? What’s her name?

Is it Mother Abagail?

Uh, I don’t-I don’t… I don’t know.

[chuckles] Are we having the same dream?

No, we’re not. This is–

We’re remembering the same commercial.

Old lady selling detergent.

This woman… told me to come see her in Colorado.

Someplace out in the mountains, near Boulder.

Hemingford Home.

That’s the one.

[exhales tersely]

What else you been painting?

Holy shit.

Huh.

This is Fran.

Who?

Fran.

The woman I saw yesterday. The one I told you about.

You didn’t say she was pregnant.

I…

Well, she wasn’t pregnant.

At least I couldn’t tell she was.

I painted that three days ago.

[exhales]

GLEN: A lot of people saw you carry him in.

Don’t give them an explanation, they’ll just make up their own.

How rumors get started.

LARRY: It’s better that they believe a rumor.

Save them from having to think about this Dark Man in Vegas, what he means when he says he’s coming.

Those people out there have a right to know.

People will panic.

Yeah. Maybe.

Maybe not. You’d be surprised what people can handle if you give them a chance.

Anybody else want to weigh in on this?

Me? I don’t f*ckin’ know. I don’t even know why I’m on the committee in the first place.

You’re here for the same reason as the rest of us, Larry–

because the magic lady says it’s God’s will.

Well, then let’s have an election.

Okay? We’ll vote on it.

Mother Abagail told us to govern this place.

If we hold an election, there is a chance that we might lose it– then what?

We’d be going against God’s will.

Yeah. Oh, and now that you bring it up, how are we so certain it’s God’s will?

I-I’m not… I’m not saying that Mother Abagail isn’t capable of things I never thought possible.

Doesn’t mean I believe that she knows what God wants.

We don’t have time for this.

Listen, until the people give their explicit consent to be governed by this group, we’re nothing more than just administrators, at best.

Come on, Stu, are you really on board with this?

We got– with all due respect– one guy who is our… go-between with Mother Abagail.

She chose, Glen.

She wasn’t interested in our opinion back then.

I can’t imagine that’s changed.

MOTHER ABAGAIL: It hasn’t.

GLEN: Mother Abagail, we’re having a conversation about…

Glen Bateman, I love you, but there’s nothing to discuss.

I told you, if you had anything you wanted to say to me, you were to say it to Nick.

And if there was anything I had to say in return, you were to act like Nick was speaking for me, and you’d take care of it.

Let me go, little girl!

Okay, but that leaves him directly responsible for the…

MOTHER ABAGAIL: What?

Okay.

[wheezing gasp]

[labored breathing]

MOTHER ABAGAIL: You’re all right.

You’ve been through a lot.

[exhales]

I dreamed of you.

I’ve come from a bad place.

An awful place.

And there’s a man there… but he ain’t no man.

He’s got lots of names.

The hardcase.

The Walkin’ Dude.

[whispers]: Flagg.

Showed up while we were all still shell-shocked.

At first, I was grateful for him.

He brought us out of the chaos, promised us a chance to be on top for once.

Then…

they started bringing in the slaves.

I stuck it out long as I could.

But then…

I knew I needed to get out.

To get here.

To you.

Flagg’s men caught me trying to cross the border.

They… Oh, God.

They put me up on that pole.

Then… he-he comes to me… whispering in my ear.

Said he’s gonna send me to you as a message.

What was the message?

He-he said–

[grunts] No, no, no, no, no!

[whimpering]

No!

[Heck exclaims] No!

[grunting]

[birds cawing, squawking]

[heavy breathing]

I have your blood in my fists, old Mother.

Pray your God takes you before you hear my boots on your steps.

I’m gonna blow your house down!

[screams]

[gasps, grunting]

[shouting]

[Heck exhales]

[insects trilling]

[shakes matchbox, tosses it down]

[overlapping, indistinct whispers]

FLAGG: There she is.

[exhales sharply]

NADINE: I don’t like it.

Boulder.

I can’t feel you there.

FLAGG: It’s the old witch with her black magic.

That’s why I need you there.

I need you to be my eye.

So lonely.

Well, of course you’re lonely.

People there, they don’t understand folks like us.

They hate what they don’t understand.

Nadine… my queen, I’m here for you.

I’ve always been here.

I want to come to you now.

Soon.

[sighs]

Just one thing I need you to do first.

Anything. Anything!

Anything.

I need you to kill the witch and the five puppets she put in charge there.

Kill?

How?

I’ve already found the weapon.

I just need you to pull his trigger.

Mind the boy.

What?

[gasps, grunts]

Hi, Joe.

[soft chuckle]

Did you have a bad dream?

[sniffles]

It’s a– It’s a silly game.

I… have to teach you that sometime.

I’ve been playing it since I was your age.

Okay, well…

Why don’t I tuck you in? Come on.

Come on, Joe.

WEIZAK: Always thought church was fairy tales for adults.

But us ending up in Colorado after the apocalypse, land of a million weed dispensaries…

Maybe there is a higher power.

Whatcha think happened to this poor bastard?

“You should see the other guy.” [chuckles weakly]

[straining]

[grunts]

Feels weird carrying one this fresh.

Yeah.

But it’s a nice change of pace.

Ready?

Yeah.

Think we ought to say something?

First guy we brought here hadn’t already been dead for weeks.

First of many.

[scoffs]

[“White Rabbit” by Jefferson Airplane begins]

♪ One pill makes you larger ♪

♪ And one pill makes you small ♪

♪ And the ones that Mother gives you ♪

♪ Don’t do anything at all ♪

♪ Go ask Alice ♪

♪ When she’s ten feet tall ♪

♪ And if you go chasing rabbits ♪

♪ And you know you’re going to fall ♪

♪ Tell ’em a hookah-smoking caterpillar ♪

♪ Has given you the call ♪

♪ He called Alice ♪

♪ When she was just small ♪

♪ When the men on the chessboard ♪

♪ Get up and tell you where to go ♪

♪ And you’ve just had some kind of mushroom ♪

♪ And your mind is moving low ♪

♪ Go ask Alice ♪

♪ I think she’ll know ♪

♪ When logic and proportion ♪

♪ Have fallen sloppy dead ♪

♪ And the White Knight is talking backwards ♪

♪ And the Red Queen’s off with her head ♪

♪ Remember ♪

♪ What the Dormouse said ♪

♪ Feed your head ♪

♪ Feed your head. ♪

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