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Modern Love – S02E05 – Am I…? Maybe this Quiz Will Tell Me [Transcript]

A middle-school girl questions her sexuality when she finds herself having feelings for another girl. She turns to social media quizzes for answers.
Modern Love - S02E05 - Am I...? Maybe this Quiz Will Tell Me

Original release date: August 13, 2021

“In retrospect, maybe I should have known who I was the first time I went looking for a quiz called ‘Am I gay?’ But I didn’t.”

* * *

♪ We face the music together ♪

♪ And throw our hats in the ring ♪

♪ Facing all kinds of weather ♪

♪ And not afraid of anything ♪

♪ Hey ♪

♪ When the sun comes up, we’ll be on our way ♪

♪ And we don’t care where we land ♪

♪ And the waves are high, but we won’t turn round ♪

♪ ‘Cause your hand is in my hand ♪

♪ And, oh-oh ♪

♪ You make me feel invincible ♪

♪ ‘Cause it’s you and me ♪

♪ Through the wind and hail ♪

♪ Setting sail into the world ♪

[indistinct chatter]

[Lucy] I’m actually dead serious. You cannot talk…

[Moush] Okay, oh, my God, okay, you’re like Katie and Tyler.

Her and Tyler are meant to be.

[Lucy] I know, know, know this.

Katie. You and Tyler.

What?

Oh, my God, Moush, stop.

Oh, my God!

I don’t like him, okay?

No, a Leo and a Gemini have to be together, right?

No!

Yes, they do.

Amber. Amber, come on.

Bye!

[Lucy] I kissed him one time for two minutes.

I took this quiz for Katie where it’s, like, a soul mates one, and it ended up in T, T for Tyler.

For Tyler. For Tyler.

The universe is speaking.

Okay, no, no, no.

Mother Nature is speaking.

She wants you to have his baby.

No. No.

It’s meant to be.

Oh! Too far, too far.

[Moush] Like, it’s gonna be so much fun.

Like, I think I’m gonna wear this new tie-dye sweatshirt.

It’s blue, so it’s perfect; it’s gonna, like, match everybody.

And, like, I got it for, like, seven dollars.

Oh, we have to make a pact now, though, to sleep next to each other, because otherwise…

No shit I’m sleeping next to you.

I can’t believe… Oh, my God.

Look at Tyler’s Instagram.

He just posted a picture of you.

I knew it. He likes you so much.

The T in the soul mates quiz is definitely Tyler.

I told you. I told you.

Shut up.

Oh, my God, I just realized that if you marry Tyler and I marry Isaac, they’re best friends, which is gonna make us family.

[gasps] And we’re gonna share our first dance together.

Ugh, but Isaac isn’t a good dancer at all.

Like, it’s gonna be really embarrassing.

[♪ Chong the Nomad: “Two Colors”]

Katie!

What?

I was talking about what a bad dancer Isaac is.

[chuckles] Yeah.

Okay, if I’m gonna marry Isaac, I’m gonna have to totally teach him how to dance.

And if he is dancing…

That girl, um, who is dancing to “Motivation” on the red team is really good.

Uh, yeah. I don’t… I-I don’t think I’ve actually ever spoken to her, but she hangs out with, like, Dez and…

What’s her name?

Uh, Alexa. Yeah, she’s got to be… Ugh.

Hey, my mom says I have to get off the phone and do my homework.

Okay.

All right, bye. Love you forever.

All right, love you.

[♪ Chong the Nomad feat. Stass THEE Boss: “Undervelvet”]

[dog barking in distance]

Hey, hi. Just wanted to see if you were up.

Yeah.

[Amber] Mom!

Yeah, I’ll be right there!

Do you want some water before you go to bed?

Uh, sure.

[Lori] I’m sorry I’m so late again.

Such a mess.

I can’t believe it’s 10:00.

Um, how was school?

[Katie] It’s fine.

How’s little Miss Moush?

Great.

What’s this?

Uh, chili, from the back of the pantry.

Did you heat it up?

Yeah.

Very impressive. Did you give some to Amber?

Of course.

Wow.

Uh, what is this, on your face?

Oh, it’s just for the color wars thing. I’m blue.

Is it a sticker?

Uh, yeah.

Take it off before you go to bed.

It’s fine.

It’s not good. It suffocates your skin.

Okay. Good night.

All right, good night.

Night. Mm-hmm.

For real.

Turn off the lights.

Mm-hmm.

♪ Got me feeling half crazy… ♪

[Amber] Mom!

[Lori] Yes, I’ll be right there.

♪ Mad shady ♪

♪ Take it to the next level, will we make it? ♪

♪ You know I dig you like a shovel, we so gravy ♪

♪ If we put the pedal to the metal ♪

♪ Are we racing? ♪

♪ But if we settle into orbit, we too spacey ♪

♪ Too spacey, spacey ♪

♪ ♪

♪ My love, my love ♪

♪ My love ♪

♪ My love, my love ♪

[Vacher] Don’t want to have to repeat myself.

Jeffery and Jameela, Nicholas and Charlotte, Katie and Tyler.

Hey.

Hey.

All right, bet.

Uh, five minutes. We got five minutes.

All right, you guys.

Romeo and Juliet, and I want you to learn your lines.

I want you to come in prepared.

[Jameela] Ms. V, uh, why don’t we do gender-neutral casting?

Jameela.

I feel like we should do all girl, no boy partners.

[Vacher] It’s important to work with the opposite gender sometimes; this is one of those times.

All right, let’s go.

[rising chatter]

[Lucy] …was right next to that gross old bagel shop?

Where they would do whipped cream cheese?

So my brother also goes there, and he’s actually really good.

[Tyler] I go there, too.

Oh, really?

That’s kind of weird.

[Tyler] Uh, Katie.

I won’t be able to rehearse today, ’cause after school I have parkour till 4:30.

She could totally do this weekend.

Um, but, like, aren’t we just rehearsing at school?

Yeah, but…

Yeah, but you want the scene to be good, right?

[Katie] Yeah.

Uh, yeah, sure. Uh, let’s do, like, this weekend.

Anytime, I’m free.

Awesome, I’ll DM you.

[Vacher] Derek, I see you!

[chuckles] No, no.

It’s too scandalous?

I’m too scandalous.

[Vacher] A.P., you are in these two rows.

These two rows only.

[overlapping chatter]

[Tyler] Hey, what are you doing on your phone?

Uh, nothing.

[chatter continues]

Useless. Does anybody else have another idea how to get up into the circle?

[boy] Lasers!

Good.

Elizabeth! Elizabeth!

[screams]

Good sir, have you seen my magical, super-strength wine elixir?

[man] Meanwhile, up in the castle, this lizard shall grow and be my companion unless you step on it.

[screams]

[woman] A lizard!

Where is it? There!

[man shouting]

[audience] Oh!

[quiet chatter]

[man] My dear daughter!

The news I have is terrible indeed.

The poppy has been purloined.

[Rainer] Gonna need everybody back up on the grass, please.

Everybody’s on the grass.

[Lucy] It’s, like, ASMR for your skin.

It’s a massive line, we got Alyssa here.

Hey, yo, Alyssa.

Okay, but I’m not wearing any eyeliner.

Absolutely not.

So, what did y’all think of the show?

How we feeling?

Great.

It was a slap. I was…

[overlapping chatter]

Okay, and then we got the lock-in at school tomorrow.

We got everyone sleeping in the gym.

I’m so excited.

This my other girl Lucy, by the way.

Hi, babe.

Anyways, and this is Katie.

Sho-go.

Now, what the hell was that?

[laughs] It’s-it’s a Dachi stance.

[Lucy] It’s from an anime.

You don’t know karate?

[Lucy] It’s from one of her baby shows.

[Dez] I don’t even know what the hell…

It’s a baby show.

It’s not a baby show. It’s anime.

I’m sorry. I love you.

It’s just a dumb show called Kaleido Star.

[Alexa] What’s it called?

[Dez] That shit is weird.

[Katie] Anime?

No. I mean, what was the name of the show that you mentioned?

Oh. Um… Uh, Kaleido Star.

[Becca] What is this?

Anime?

It’s, like, animation.

[Alexa] It’s Japanese cartoons.

They have the really big eyes.

[Katie and Alexa laugh]

Have you seen… Wait, have you seen Black Butler?

No. No, what’s that?

Okay, that-that one’s my favorite. It’s about this boy who signs a Faustian contract with a demon to get revenge on the people who have murdered his family and then tortured him.

That’s so dark.

That sounds cool.

I think you would like it.

And, um… Wait, what was your name? [chuckles]

I didn’t get your name.

Uh, Katie.

Katie. Okay. I’m Alexa.

So, no, I’ve heard of Kaleido Star, but I haven’t seen it.

I watched Gakuen Alice when I was a lot younger.

Yes. Yes.

Okay, cool.

Yeah.

Like, nobody knows that one.

This is crazy. [laughs]

Hey, I don’t know anyone else who’s watched it, either.

Yeah, and, like, all my friends think I’m, like, super stupid for watching anime.

Oh, really?

But they haven’t even seen, like, any anime, so they can’t really judge me, you know?

But, um…

[Rainer] All right, everybody. Let’s get down for a group picture, please! Group picture!

[overlapping chatter]

[Alexa] That’s really neat, by the way.

[♪ Sylvan Esso: “Rooftop Dancing”]

♪ Moonlight’s bright ♪

♪ And the kids don’t care ♪

♪ Meet me at the streetlight, gonna take you there ♪

♪ Take you rooftop dancin’ ♪

[indistinct chatter]

[Katie] Amber, why would I take those? Stop touching my stuff! Get out!

Fine!

♪ I’ll take you rooftop dancin’ ♪

[mouths]

[Tyler] Have you, um…

[mouths]

Have you done any Shakespeare before?

Uh, not really.

Have you, um, looked at the…

[Vacher] You guys, use your dictionary.

I’ll just pull up the SparkNotes.

[phone buzzes]

[Tyler] Okay.

[Vacher] See if you can figure it out.

[boy] This is so stupid.

Should we, uh… I don’t know.

Should we try to memorize it?

Uh…

Yeah, if that’s what you need to do.

[Vacher] Hold on. I’m coming.

[Tyler] Coolio. Uh, did you get my DM?

[Katie] Hmm?

About us hanging out over the weekend.

Uh, ’cause of rehearsing the…

If you… If you can’t, that’s okay. Um…

[Katie] Um…

[Tyler] I understand.

Um… No, uh, yeah.

Yeah, I would really…

Really?

I would really, really love to.

Awesome. Okay.

Yeah.

Um, unless you want to rehearse it in the lock-in, since, you know, we’re both blue.

[chuckling] No way.

That sounds awful.

[laughs]

Yeah, you’re right. Um, okay, let’s…

[Katie] She told us that she was gonna be gone for a while, but I didn’t expect it to be overnight, so we came here.

And she’d been in this, like, terrible car accident.

What?

It was… It was traumatizing, really.

And she was there for, like, another twoish weeks.

Um, but that was, like, a really long story. I’m sorry.

[Alexa] No, really, is your mom okay now?

[phone buzzing]

Oh, yeah, no, she’s totally fine.

Just basically made her, like, quit her job and reevaluate her whole life, but…

Uh, she’s in med school now, and she’s almost…

These things are so stupid.

Here, you can take it. What’s the combination?

It’s, uh, 15-42-3.

[Alexa] You can take it.

It’s just spam. [chuckles]

Oh.

What’s this?

No.

[laughs]

No, it’s nothing.

Is it true you’re 93% dateable?

No. No.

My friend made me do this, and it was not willing, and it’s…

“You love holding hands, talking about feelings, and you’re ready to fall in love.”

No. No.

[laughs]

No. No. No, no. These things are so ridiculous.

Okay? I did one the other day about how my Patronus is a beagle.

Which is ridiculous bec… No.

Aw.

No, beagles are so lame.

No, they’re not.

Do you ever think about beagles?

They’re so sweet.

No. Well, maybe.

[chuckles]

I think my Patronus is a dolphin.

Ooh.

Dolphin. I like that.

Dolphins are cool.

Yeah, they are cool. They have, like, superhuman emotions.

Did you know that they’re the only animal other than humans to have sex for pleasure?

[laughs] What? How do you know that?

Yeah.

Why do you know that? [laughs]

I don’t know. [laughs]

So have you ever dated anyone since you’re 93% dateable?

[laughs]

Uh, no. No. Have you?

Oh, no. I’m probably zero percent dateable.

[phone buzzes]

Oh, that’s my mom.

We live about five minutes away, and she still insists on driving me everywhere.

Yeah, mine, too.

We’re literally, like, four blocks away.

I’m on 126th and 107th Ave.

I don’t know if you’re…

Oh, my God.

I’m on 124th and Liberty.

I don’t…

That’s, like, I…

No. That’s, like, really close.

Really?

We’re only, like, a couple blocks down from each other. Yeah.

Oh, that’s really cool.

Really?

Yeah.

That’s her. See you tomorrow.

Bye.

[indistinct chatter]

Slow down!

Sorry!

[Lori] Driving me crazy.

[Amber] Definitely Miranda.

She’s pretty dusty.

[Lori] Okay, here she is.

Amber, just tell me where I’m going.

Hi. Hi. I’m so sorry. Class ran a little late.

Left or right? Kathryn!

[Amber] Uh…

Why do you have a phone if you’re not gonna answer it when I call you?

Uh… it’s a left.

Left. Thank you. Kathryn, you could at least text me back.

That’s the whole point of why you have the thing in the first place.

Uh, sorry. I was just talking to Ms. Vacher about my scene.

[Lori] Amber, can you get, uh, Jenna’s mom on the phone and tell her we’re gonna be 20 minutes late?

Uh, Cynthia. Kathryn, put your seat belt on.

Is it a… is it a “C” or an “S” or a… Cynthia?

No, no, no. “C.” C-Y-N.

[Katie] My battery was running a little low, too, so I just didn’t want to text you. Sorry.

[Lori] Today is the day that you had to be in the car, and I need to hear from you.

Don’t forget.

[Amber] Huh?

[Lori] No, no, no. Just text her. Cynthia.

[Amber] Okay. Oh, I see. Okay, there we go.

Okay, now what should I do?

[Lori] All right, tell her, we’re g… we’re gonna be 20 minutes late.

I mean, seriously, Kathryn, the reason why I got you the phone is so that I could be in touch with you, not so you could write to Moush and Lucy ten times.

[Lori] This is what we have.

Massive rip in the top.

Nobody is gonna notice.

Move.

[Lori] Look, this is the sleeping bag that we’ve got.

Katie, do not go into my room.

Mom, I can’t take that one.

Here. Look. It’s not even that big of a rip.

[Katie] I can’t. I can’t.

It’s just this little thing with the fuzz coming out.

I can sew it for you.

It’s gross, and there’s a huge rip, and it just…

Well, I don’t why I’m finding out about it now a half hour before you’re supposed to be at the school that you need a brand-new sleeping bag.

‘Cause you’re never home, and when you are home, all you’re doing is studying, studying, studying.

Excuse me?! All right, Kathryn.

I don’t have time for this.

You don’t care about me or what’s important to me.

Amber, can I have your sleeping bag, please?

She cannot take my sleeping bag!

You’re gonna have to clean all this up.

Can’t leave this big mess for me.

…and go to Dad’s, I could’ve done this beforehand.

Okay?

Can’t have my sleeping bag!

If you want to go to your father’s…

What? Who paid for it, Amber?

I wanted to before, but you wouldn’t let me!

Then, fine.

It takes an hour to get to your father’s.

You could go or you can miss it.

Ugh!

I thought you were just going with Moush and Lucy.

I don’t know why you need something fancy.

Here.

Here. Look. This one is newer.

No. That is a ginormous Peppa Pig sleeping bag.

Okay, so we’ll turn it inside out.

All right, look, there’s nothing in here.

It’s purple.

Ooh.

Still see the pink Peppa Pig zipper. I’m not a nine-year-old.

Well, then, we’ll just cover it up, or take the thing…

I don’t understand why everything has to be so…

There’s no freaking way I’m taking that thing to the lock-in.

Kathryn!

[loud, overlapping chatter]

Katie!

Hey!

Dude, I thought you were freaking dead!

I was about to call the cops.

You guys aren’t playing?

[Moush] Oh, no.

Dodgeball is the worst.

No.

Mr. Daniel said we’re gonna play capture the flag soon all over the entire school.

Are you kidding me?

[Lucy] I’m seriously gonna ask to switch colors ’cause, legit, no one on green is athletic.

Like, none of the guys do sports.

Really?

[Lucy] Yeah. They got all the athletic guys.

Oh, but did you see Jake?

He had a major grow-up over the summer.

[Lucy] Okay, kind of, but just Jake. That is…

No, there’s also Charlie.

Is anyone else hungry?

[Lucy] I… You got all the…

Collect all three of the other team’s flags.

Big rule: the second floor is off-limits.

Yes!

Yes!

Can everyone say that with me?

[all] The second floor is off-limits.

Right? So we shouldn’t see anybody running on the stairs.

I don’t want to see any pushing, any kicking.

Does everyone understand that?

Robert, does everyone understand that?

[girl] Yes.

Great. Okay. So I will be with the red team.

I want all of you to walk, not run.

Oh.

Get your flag.

Come on!

Go. Go, go, go!

[Daniels] Yellows are with me!

[overlapping chatter]

[boy] Mr. Daniels!

The team comes in, just it’s called…

Uh, yeah, just make sure part of it’s open, okay?

Uh, stop talking about it. Nobody look at it.

Everyone, over here. Okay, come on.

Shh.

Guys, just listen up. The way everyone will know where we’ve hidden it is,

is if we just have people standing outside the library.

Yeah.

We’ve got to keep switching defenders, okay?

So, maybe you two could start? Right?

Perfect.

And then, I’m gonna lead a party to the cafeteria for yellow. Who’s with me?

Okay. Go. Go, go.

There are no other places to hide in the gym.

And, like, shouldn’t we try to get red anyway?

No. The cafeteria is such much closer to our base.

We just… We’re fine, right?

Um, no.

Like, why are we gonna get red out?

I feel like it would be better if we got red out.

It would be better. Like…

Oh, Moush!

Can you just let the… What are you do…?

[boy] Watch out!

[giggling]

I’m faster! No, no, no.

No. No, it’s like a tactic I’m throwing you.

[laughing]

A tactic. I’m throwing you off by chasing you.

Okay, okay.

Do you want to help me find the yellow flag?

Okay. Yeah.

All right?

It could be… it could be a shared blue-red win.

Yeah, we could, like, cut it right down the middle.

Brilliant.

And we have perfect, amazing…

Cool. Let’s go. Great. Great.

Let’s go.

[overlapping chatter]

[both laughing]

Well, there aren’t any yellow defenders in here.

We have to go where the defenders are.

All right.

Defenders!

Defenders! Where are you?

[hums] Defenders!

Defenders!

Defenders!

Defenders!

Defenders.

[whispers] Alexa?

Alexa?

You’re not supposed to be on the stair…

Oh, my…

[whispers] Alexa?

Alexa?

Alexa, come on.

What are you doing?

Oh, my God.

[both laugh]

There’s no one here. We can sit down.

Behind the MPR.

Okay. Go.

This way.

No, this is faster. It’s faster.

[woman] Hello?

Who is that?

[door squeaks open]

[door closes]

[laughs]

Shh.

Wait.

[woman] Hello? Who’s up here?

Okay.

What?

[panting]

[door opens]

[Katie] Duck down.

Yeah.

[both panting]

[shoe squeaks]

[gasps]

Oh, my God.

Hey. Shh.

[footsteps approaching]

[door squeaks open]

Shh. Shh.

Okay.

[door squeaks]

[door closes]

[footsteps retreating]

[both panting]

[groans]

I think she’s gone.

I think she’s gone.

How long do you think we’re gonna have to wait in here?

[panting]

For eternity.

I got a detention for this once. It was…

[laughs]

[both laughing softly]

Okay, come on.

[both giggle softly]

[both laugh]

We can’t hold hands.

Why not?

[laughs] We just can’t. Don’t be crazy.

I don’t care.

Well, you’re-you’re crazy, too. [laughs]

[laughs]

What?

[indistinct chatter]

Girls, you’re late! Come on.

[chatter continues]

[Moush] Hey, where were you guys?

Nowhere.

What?

Huh?

What is going on? What happened?

Nothing. Just stop talking.

Why were you with that girl?

Katie! She won’t tell me.

What’s happening?

Nothing’s happening.

Okay, why are you guys talking when you’re on different teams? Okay.

I don’t know why you’re making such a big… Moush!

Hey.

Hey.

So what were you guys doing?

What do you mean?

Okay, why were you guys late getting back?

Nothing. I, um… I don’t know her.

We don’t know each other, right?

I just saw you.

No. I…

So you weren’t together?

No, we…

I don’t… Yeah, I don’t…

I don’t know what she was doing.

I was just going to the bathroom.

What were you doing?

Nothing.

Oh, my God. Okay, what is going on?

Katie, what aren’t you telling me?

Katie Stonebaker and, uh, uh, what’s your name?

Uh, Alexa. With me. Now. Come on.

[Daniels] Okay, guys, 10:00.

I want you all done with your ice cream. No more…

Stop. Right here. This is good.

Why were you on the second floor?

Nothing, huh?

Okay, I’m gonna have to ask you to empty your pockets.

We weren’t doing anything.

You were told not to be on the second floor and nobody was to be on the second floor.

You need to tell me why you were on the second floor where you were specifically told not to go, and I need you to tell me now, or I’m gonna call your parents.

I’m not playing.

I was sick.

I had a… I… I really wasn’t feeling well, and I was embarrassed.

She was helping me. That…

It’s the only reason why she’s with me.

Come on, girls.

Really. Gonna have to do better than that.

[Alexa] I’m sorry.

I’m sorry.

Neither one of you are gonna play any more games tonight.

I want you to go get your bags, go to opposite sides of the gym by yourselves, not with your friends, alone, you got it?

[Alexa] Yes.

Okay, go.

[indistinct chatter]

[Daniels] Guys, we’ll have a TV set up, okay?

Mr. Lopez and Ms. Jones have a film for us.

If you like, you can watch it.

[phone buzzes]

[phone buzzes]

Ms. Vacher, I’m really not feeling well.

Can I please go home?

You want to see the nurse?

No.

Well, Katie, I can’t let you walk out of here.

It’s the middle of the night.

No, my mom’s gonna pick me up in, like, ten minutes, so…

You texted your mom?

But you’re gonna miss the morning.

You’re gonna miss all the fun.

It’s fine, I don’t… I don’t want to have to be sick here, I-I… I just can’t be here anymore.

Fine, get Mr. Mihill to wait outside with you.

That’s my mom.

Okay, good night.

Are you okay?

[Katie] Yeah. Yeah.

Something happen with one of your friends?

No.

No, they’re okay.

Like Moush?

No. No.

Well, what happened?

It was just…

I was just feeling a little sick, but, I mean, I feel a little better now, so I’m okay.

Did somebody say something to you?

No.

[sighs]

[turn signal clicking]

You’re feeling sick?

Yeah. Just… I mean, I-I wasn’t feeling well, but I am.

I do feel a lot better now, so…

If it’s all okay, then how come I’m driving home?

No, it’s-it’s all okay now. It’s fine.

Just don’t worry about it.

Well, I do worry about it, ’cause you’re my daughter.

I want to know.

Well, do you need something?

No. No.

Well, did you feel like you’re gonna throw up?

Mom, just stop asking me so many questions, okay?

I told you I was okay. I’m okay.

If you need something for your stomach or for…

No. No, no, no, I’ll be okay.

Don’t-don’t worry about it.

[sighing] Okay.

[engine turns off]

Wait, Katie.

Katie, stop. Just…

Please, just stay for a second.

Just…

[door closes]

Thank you.

[sighs]

[exhales]

You can talk to me.

You can always say whatever you want to say to me.

I’m right here.

All right?

You can alw… You can say whatever you want to say to me.

[sniffles]

Even when I’m not home.

Just call me.

[crying]

Oh.

[whispers] Katie.

I’m sorry.

[crying]

Oh… sweetie.

I know I haven’t been home.

And you’ve been doing so much to help me.

I’m sorry.

[crying]

I’m so sorry.

[crying]

[kisses]

[crying]

[woman] Now, you put the eyeliner…

[upbeat music playing]

♪ Don’t be suspicious, don’t… ♪

[sniffs]

[man] Spin it a little bit so that the flour’s distributed equally and you’re just gonna have one…

[rhythmic music playing]

[♪ Sylvan Esso: “What If”]

♪ What if end was begin? ♪

♪ Then would men be like mothers? ♪

♪ And the falling of others would be like ♪

♪ The first leaves of flowers ♪

♪ What if darkness was light? ♪

…to Katie. Oh, my God.

Oh, my God.

Katie, she’s literally been sleeping the entire…

She’s dead. Oh, my… Just…

Do you see that? Look at the drool.

Look at that.

Look at that.

Look at the drool.

♪ We’d stalk our prey ♪

♪ They can’t see in the day ♪

♪ It’s too white ♪

♪ Oh, life ♪

♪ Dying out ♪

♪ And the oceans ♪

♪ Turn to clouds ♪

♪ Soggy birds ♪

♪ Raining down ♪

[creaking]

♪ From the sky ♪

♪ Having drowned ♪

♪ Oh, it’s not ♪

♪ What you think ♪

♪ It’s a memory bank ♪

♪ And it’s living ♪

[dog barking]

♪ In our mouths ♪

♪ So open wide ♪

[dog barking in distance]

[Belinda exhales]

Hi!

Hi. Uh… Sorry. I…

Wait, you’re Lori’s daughter, right?

You okay?

Yeah. Yeah, I’m just here to talk to Alexa. But it’s, like, not a big deal.

Okay.

Does your mom know you’re here?

Do you want to call her?

No, uh, she knows.

It’s okay. But I can… I can just…

Mm.

No, no, no, no, no. Come on in. It’s okay.

Just, uh… Come in.

She’s just not back from the lock-in yet.

Can you come down, honey? I want you to meet Alexa’s friend!

[coughing]

[grunts]

Craig?

Hi.

Hi.

Morning.

Morning. [chuckles]

What’s your name?

I’m Katie.

Hi, Katie. I’m Alexa’s dad.

Nice to meet you.

Coffee?

No. No coffee. [chuckles softly]

Coffee’s for adults. He’s kidding.

What’d you guys get into and talk about at the lock-in?

Uh, nothing, really. Just, like, some games, I guess, and stuff.

Yeah.

Sounds like fun. You know, Alexa should be back soon. If you want to just wait up, her room is at the top of the stairs on the left, okay?

Okay.

Uh… thanks.

[chuckles]

[Craig] You know, Adam called me last night…

[blender whirring]

[Belinda] Just let me know if you need something to drink or-or breakfast! Whatever!

Okay.

Thanks.

[Belinda speaking indistinctly in distance]

[blender whirring in distance]

[door opens]

[Alexa] Mom!

[Belinda speaking indistinctly]

[door closes]

[footsteps approaching]

Hey.

Hi.

What are you doing here?

I… I just… I have to talk to you.

[Alexa] Okay.

[exhales] Sorry, could you just, um, close the door?

Thank you.

[door closes]

Okay.

Listen, I’m really sorry.

No, no, no, no.

I’m the one apologizing. You don’t have to apologize, okay?

I got us in trouble for…

I am… I’m really messed up for what I did, and I should not have said what-what I said.

And I-I’m really sorry for that. And I…

I-I don’t want to give you, like, the wrong idea, because I-I know I’m not gay.

Like, I’m 100% positive that I’m not.

And-and I really don’t want to lead you on or whatever.

But, like, you’re a Leo, right? A-And I’m a Libra.

And there’s, like, zero compatibility there.

Those are, like, the worst combination.

So it just really wouldn’t work.

And I took this quiz, and it, percentage-wise, turns out I’m asexual.

So I-I…

Katie, you…

No, no. I really just don’t want to give you the wrong idea.

And that is… what I wanted you to talk… I-I wanted to talk to you about.

Well, I don’t…

So maybe I should just, like, go.

I don’t understand.

Why did you kiss me?

Well, I-I wasn’t thinking in that moment, and-and I wanted to, but I…

Well, you wanted to?

Yeah, I wanted to, but I just wasn’t… I-I wasn’t really thinking about…

Then that’s okay.

If you wanted to.

Well, did you want to?

Yeah.

[Katie] Really?

Yes. [chuckles]

Okay.

Okay. [chuckles]

[chuckles softly] Sorry that I’m just, like, standing here in your room, creepily.

[chuckles]

It’s fine. I’m pretty sure that my parents are probably making us breakfast right now.

So…

We usually have pancakes every Saturday.

[chuckles] Um, okay. Yeah, if… if you don’t mind.

No. [chuckles]

Will your parents mind?

Nope. [chuckles]

Okay, yeah. I just, like, probably have to, like, call my mom or text her really fast.

But, no, if-if you don’t mind, I…

♪ Looking out, made no sound, you’re a first ♪

♪ Can I follow you? Now I know ♪

♪ I can’t be the only one ♪

♪ Make a mess of it all, take the rest ♪

♪ Out the drawer, shut the door, for who knew ♪

♪ You’re the best by tomorrow ♪

♪ You and me then ♪

♪ Look forward to the weekend ♪

♪ Look forward to the weekend ♪

♪ Oh… ♪

♪ Look forward to the weekend ♪

♪ Hey, shorty, wherever you are going ♪

♪ Eye contact, make me want to lose it ♪

♪ Too early for myself to call it ♪

♪ Too early, too early ♪

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Krapopolis – S02E01 – Ice Week! | Transcript

Tyrannis tries to keep his cool when he gets the hots for a reporter visiting Krapopolis for its annual Ice Week; an old friend pays Shlub a visit; Hippocampus and Stupendous risk missing the festivities completely.

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