Euphoria – S02E01 – Trying to Get to Heaven Before They Close the Door | Transcript

Rue and Jules cross paths for the first time since Christmas as East Highland rings in the new year.
Euphoria - S02E01 - Trying to Get to Heaven Before They Close the Door

Aired on January 10, 2022

As a child, Fez was taken in by his grandmother, who introduced him to drug dealing. In a continuation of the scene from the season one finale, Ashtray attacks Mouse, striking him with a hammer and killing him. On New Year’s Eve, Rue rides with Fez and Ashtray to a new dealer’s apartment. Before they enter, Rue is introduced to Fay, the girlfriend of one of Fez’s associates, who shoots up heroin. Once inside, they are all forced to strip at gunpoint as the new dealer is concerned that they’re wearing wires. After some chaos, Fez is able to purchase a suitcase full of drugs. A drunken Cassie runs into Nate at a convenience store. He offers her a ride to the New Year’s Eve party she had been on her way to before fighting with Lexi. At the party, Nate and Cassie have sex in the bathroom and are nearly interrupted by Maddy, forcing Cassie to hide in the bathtub. Rue finds Fay’s heroin in the car and encounters Elliot in the laundry room. They do drugs together, and Rue’s pulse slows, forcing her to take Adderall to get her heart rate up. Outside, she and Jules reunite. Rue tells Jules that she relapsed the night Jules left her at the train station. Later, the two confess their feelings and kiss. Fez has a conversation with Lexi and they exchange phone numbers. He then confronts Nate, beating him to a bloody pulp until the other partygoers stop him.

* * *

Rue: Fezco’s grandma was a motherf*ckin’ G.

(“Don’t Be Cruel” by Billy Swan playing)

♪ You know I can be found ♪

♪ I’m sittin’ home all alone ♪

♪ If you can’t come around ♪

♪ At least on the telephone ♪

(indistinct chatter)

♪ Don’t be cruel ♪


♪ To a heart that’s true ♪

♪ Baby, if I made ya mad ♪

♪ For somethin’ that I might have said ♪

Hey, f*ckface!

(cocks gun)

What the f*ck? You crazy…


(both screaming)

♪ Don’t be cruel ♪

(screaming continues)

♪ To a heart that’s true ♪

(on radio): ♪ Don’t want no other love ♪


♪ Baby, it’s just you… ♪

I just spoke to your daddy. You’re gonna come live with grandma now. Okay?

♪ Don’t be cruel ♪

(Starts engine)

♪ To a heart that’s true ♪

♪ Don’t be cruel ♪

♪ To a heart that’s true ♪

Rue: And even though she wasn’t, like, the best guardian…

(“Look at Grandma” by Bo Diddley playing)

…she taught him everything he knew about life.

Bag that shit up. Put it in your f*ckin’ tighty-whities. Cops ain’t gonna pat down a f*ckin’ 10-year-old.

♪ Look at grandma wearin’ her hotpants ♪

They don’t wanna be f*ckin’ accused of bein’ f*ckin’ pederasts. You know what I’m sayin’?

Rue: He didn’t really know much about his mom. His grandma never really liked to talk about her, except to occasionally say…

Grandma: Your mom had a pure heart. But your daddy always took advantage of that.

♪ What you tryin’ to do ♪

♪ Grandma, grandma everybody’s watching you ♪

Let me tell you somethin’ snowflake, there’s a short supply of kindness in this world. People sniff it out… and they swoop right the f*ck in.

♪ Look at grandma, grandma’s out of sight ♪

Don’t ever fall in love. It’s the one instinct… you can’t trust.

♪ Look at grandma ♪

♪ Oh, look at her ♪

Rue: Fezco liked that she didn’t treat him like a kid.

All right, today we’re gonna learn about weight and volume.

Rue: He went to school, and when he paid attention, he did well.

There’s 28.5 grams in an ounce.

Teacher: How many ounces in a pound?

Young Fezco: Sixteen.

Rue: Especially in math. And then one day, he came home from school.

(“Jump Into The Fire” by Harry Nilsson playing)

Grandma: F*ckin’ day I’ve f*ckin’ had.

Rue: He didn’t know who the baby was.

What’s up?

Rue: But so much always happened so fast he decided it was better not to ask questions.

♪ You can climb a mountain ♪

You remember the white cracker with the f*ckin’ bowl-cut?

♪ You can jump into the fire ♪

Who the f*ck brings a kid to a drug deal?

He ain’t a kid, asshole. He’s my partner.

That f*ckin’ bowl-cut cocksucka! Sold me 10 grand of f*ckin’ Bayer Aspirin. F*cked us both up the ass, snowflake.

♪ We can make each other happy ♪

Grandma: Look at him. He’s a cute little bastard. Sad story, though. Some cunt mother gave him to me as collateral. He’s ours till 10 PM. Hey, can I get the, uh, pop off?

Call me when his mama gets here.

(baby cries)

Rue: The baby was really cute, but no matter what he did, he couldn’t get him to stop crying. He probably just missed his mom.

(baby shrieks)

(“Think” by Curtis Mayfield playing)

Rue: She never came back to pick him up.

(funky music playing)

Grandma: My nephew, your uncle, Carl, he ends up eatin’ so much f*ckin’ McDonald’s, he gives himself diabetes, right? Next thing you know, they’re chopping off his f*ckin’ feet, right? Three years later, he f*ckin’ drops dead. Do I call the f*ckin’ cops, and say, “Oh, you gotta f*ckin’ arrest Ronald f*ckin’ McDonald?”

I don’t know.

Grandma: No, I don’t f*ckin’ call. ‘Cause it’s f*ckin’ Uncle Carl’s fault. Nobody told him to f*ckin’ eat McDonald’s

for f*ckin’ breakfast, lunch and dinner. You understand? Watch this f*ckin’ kid. Come on. Get the baby. Oh, what the f*ck are you doin’? Come here. Let me get… Let me take it. No, no, no. Get it. Yeah. This f*ckin’ kid. He’s eatin’ f*ckin’ cigarettes. Now, you’re f*ckin’ one of us, right? What are you, a little f*ckin’ ashtray? F*ckin’ livin’ your best life in the f*ckin’ jacuzzi here.

(Grandma laughs)

(rap music playing)

♪ ♪

Rue: Fezco knew that his grandma wasn’t normal, and did things that maybe other parents wouldn’t do. But they were a family.

(phone ringing)

(“I Want Action” by Poison playing)


(on radio): ♪ I want action tonight… ♪

What? He’s at the Family Donut right now?

(“I Walk on Guilded Splinters” by Johnny Jenkins playing)

Rue: His grandma also taught him that, despite what they teach ya in school, violence is sometimes the best possible way to solve a problem.

I spy with my little eye… cracker with a bowl-cut.

♪ Oh oh oh, oh oh oh ♪

(car door shuts)

♪ Walk to me, get it, come, come ♪

♪ Walk on gilded splinters ♪

♪ Some people think they jive me ♪

♪ But I know they must be crazy ♪

Rue: Fez doesn’t know why he did what he did, but he did it anyway.

Muthaf*cka! Eat f*ckin’ shit!

Grandma! Grandma!

(Grandma yelling)

You f*ckin’ take my money? You scumbag! Muthaf*cka! Piece of shit!

Rue: That was his first dark spot. He didn’t really remember anything for at least two months. Just an occasional image, and an overwhelming fear about who was gonna take care of Ashtray.

Grandma: I don’t feel too good. I’m gonna go lie down.

Rue: He never really blamed his grandma. She never really apologized for it.

(slow funk music playing)

But he knew she felt bad.


He found this grandma on the floor of the bathroom. Fez didn’t wanna call 911 for obvious reasons, so he decided to drive her car to the hospital, which took forever. It was definitely a mistake. The doctor even said it.

Is she going to be okay?

Doctor: Every second counts.

Rue: The next thing he knew… he had a business to run. And a little brother to take care of.

♪ Yeah ♪

And however hard he thought life was… it got harder and more complicated. ‘Cause the more you move up in the world, the more enemies you make. He wondered how his grandma would deal with someone like Nate. But he didn’t have his grandma.

(both laughing)

Look at him over there!

Rue: Just Ash.

(“Who Am I” by The O’Jays playing)

Ash was his brother. He loved him like a brother. And when shit went down…

Man: You’re late.

Fezco: We got caught up dealin’ with some bullshit.

Man: I heard you got raided.

Fezco: They ain’t find nothin’, though. They ain’t got shit on me.

♪ Who am I ♪

Rue: He’d go to war like a brother.

Man: I hope not.

♪ Together that pass me by, uhh ♪

♪ Who am I ♪

♪ Who am I ♪

♪ A fool without an alibi ♪

♪ I should’ve paid more attention, whoa ♪

♪ To what she’d said ♪

♪ I just wouldn’t listen, I had a very hard head ♪

Fezco: Are we good?

♪ Ooh ♪

Oh shit! Aah!


What the f*ck?! (screaming)

Yo, bro, what the f*ck, man? God!


Oh, what the f*ck?! What the f*ck?!


Dude, what the f*ck?

(“Hit ‘Em Up” by 2Pac playing)

♪ Westside bad boy killers ♪

♪ You know who the realest is, niggas, we bring it, too ♪

♪ Take money ♪

♪ First off, f*ck your bitch ♪

(Rue singing along) ♪ And the click you claim ♪

♪ Westside when we ride come equipped with game ♪

♪ You claim to be a player but I f*cked your wife ♪

Yo, it-it’s up here on the right.

(Rue continues singing)

Rue: ♪ You know the rules ♪

♪ Cut your young ass up, leave you in pieces ♪

♪ Now be deceased ♪

♪ Lil’ Kim, don’t f*ck around with real G’s ♪

♪ Quick to snatch yo’ ugly ass off the streets ♪

♪ So f*ck peace ♪

♪ Let the Westside ride tonight ♪

(softly): Jesus Christ.


(continues singing)

(mumbling lyrics)

Yo, can you tell her to shut the f*ck up?

Fezco: Yeah, Rue, you gotta chill out back there for real. Me and Ash gotta handle some serious business right now, so.

Rue: Yeah, for sure. No, I can do that. I can just stay back here. It’s real comfy.

(sirens in the distance)

Fezco: Who the f*ck is this bitch?

Custer: Yo!

Fezco: Who the f*ck is this, man?

Hi, I’m Faye.

What is she doin’ here?

Nah, nah, bro, that’s my f*ckin’ girl.

(continues indistinct)

…so good. I’m tellin’ you. Like a f*ckin’ mouse. Okay?

Whatever, man. Let’s just do this.

Faye… In the car.


Ten, 20 minutes tops, all right? Y’all just please stay in the car. No f*ckin’ funny business. Let’s go.

Custer: You know, you guys did right by me, I’mma, I’mma do right by you. I was tryin’ to get ahold of that f*ckin’ doctor I was telling you about, but he must be on vacation or some shit.

Hi, I’m Faye.

Rue: Yo, fam, uh, Rue.


Rue: How’s your New Year’s goin’?


Rue: New Year’s.

It’s f*cking New Year’s?

Rue: I believe so.

What? New year. I swear my boyfriend doesn’t tell me anything.

Fezco: So, who is this dude?

This dude ain’t a dude.

All right? Her name is Laurie.

She’s a little bit of a trip. Used to be a schoolteacher, but there ain’t no money in that.

Just, um, let me do the talking.

Rue: My girlfriend, at the f*ckin’ train station, she left me straight-up.

She left you at a f*cking train station?

Rue: Yeah, I was, like, crying.

What a f*cking cunt.

Rue: Yeah.

Holy f*cking shit.

Rue: Yeah. Um… I don’t think… I wouldn’t do that here.

It’s just heroin.

No, I, I see that. But, maybe, like, I don’t know. I just feel like it isn’t… the best place to do that.


Rue: Um… I just feel like this is really not the right time to be doing that.

Faye: Listen, I f*cking know what you are. You’re just a f*ckin’ junkie-ass bitch, and you’re probably f*cking eating that ginger’s ass for f*ckin’ oxys or whatever the f*ck you’re into. F*ckin’ junkie-ass bitch F*ckin’…

(continues indistinct)

Rue: Yo, what the f*ck are you doing? What, what the f*ck? Are you just puttin’ it in there? What are you doing? Oh my god… okay. Jesus, that’s your whole f*cking crotch. Ow, that looks like it hurt, ow.


Rue: What the f*ck?!


F*ck is you doin’ here?

(door closes)

Mitch, don’t f*ckin’ hesitate. You come to my muthaf*ckin’ house…

(Custer howls in pain)

…with a f*ckin’ 12-year-old, two junkie whores, and a motherf*cker I don’t know. You out of your f*ckin’ mind?


I’m on f*ckin’ probation.

Bruce Jr.: Me too.

We are not involved with any illegal activity. We don’t associate with anybody involved in illegal activity. And Laurie over there? Laurie don’t deserve this shit.



(eerie music playing)

(“Right Down The Line” by Gerry Rafferty playing)

All right, check this out. All y’all, let’s get naked right f*ckin’ now. Come on, man. Let’s go! Get naked right f*ckin’ now. Let’s go, c’mon.

Bruce Jr.: You heard what the f*ck he said, c’mon!

Bruce: Come on, let’s go. Everybody, let’s go. Undress.

Except for you. Keep your shit on, man. Nobody wants to see you naked.

B.J., take his ass down. Put ’em in a f*ckin’ closet.

Fezco: Yo, yo, come on now, y’all. Chill. Nobody, Nobody got no f*ckin’ wire.

Prove that shit. I don’t know who the f*ck you are! For real! Far as I’m concerned, you’re a f*ckin’ cop!

Obviously, I’m not wearing a f*cking wire. You paranoid…


Hey! Hey, hey, she didn’t do shit.

I’m just tryna tell you…


Custer: Oh f*ck!

Bruce: Let’s go, c’mon.

Everybody, let’s get naked.

C’mon, man, let’s go. C’mon, man, hurry!

Let’s go!

(on stereo): ♪ Right down the line ♪

Bruce: Come on. Let’s go, man. Ain’t got all f*ckin’ night.

♪ I know how much I lean on you ♪

♪ Only you can see ♪

♪ The changes that I’ve been through ♪

♪ Have left a mark on me ♪

♪ You’ve been as constant as a Northern Star ♪

♪ The brightest light that shines ♪

♪ It’s been you, woman ♪

♪ Right down the line ♪

♪ I just wanna say this is my way ♪

♪ Of tellin’ you everything ♪

♪ I could never say before ♪

♪ Yeah, this is my way of tellin’ you ♪

♪ That every day I’m lovin’ you so much more ♪

♪ ‘Cause you believed in me ♪

You not hear what the f*ck I said?

Rue: Uh, no, I’m, I’m just… I’m in, I’m in high school.

Yo, yo, hold on, man.

Whoa there, pretty boy. I’ll fold your shit right here.


Okay. (grunts)

I’ve never met a f*ckin’ doped-out hooker afraid to take her f*ckin’ clothes off.

Rue: (breathes heavily) I, I promise I won’t say anything.

You promise? Promise f*ckin’ what?! Huh? Lift your f*ckin’ shirt up! Want me to do it for ya? Huh?

Rue: No, no, no, no.

Fold yo’ shit.

Ayo, what the f*ck is goin’ on back there, yo? Hurry the f*ck up!


Bruce: Take your f*ckin’ pants off.


Bruce: See how easy that was? Get f*ckin’ dressed.

B.J., we good?

Yeah, we good. Kid had a Glock on him.

So, now what?

Hey… Laurie. It’s really good to see you again. Um… I, I wanted to introduce you to a super-dope friend of mine… my boy, Fez. He’s, like… He’s fire, like…

Where’s Mouse?

Um… You think I could, like, put my drawers on, and talk to you in the other room for a sec?


(“Dirty Work” by Steely Dan playing)

Mouse ain’t gonna be comin’ around no more.

Laurie: Why’s that?

‘Cause I didn’t like the way he did business.

Laurie: Says the guy who brings a kid to a drug deal.

That’s not a kid. That’s my business partner.

Laurie: Says the guy who brings a high school girl to a drug deal.

That’s my family.

Laurie: She an addict?

She might f*ck around, but nah.

So you trust her?

With my life.

♪ When you need a bit of lovin’ ♪

♪ ‘Cause your man is out of town ♪

Um, could I put my clothes back on now?

(chuckles) Only if you want to.

I’ll get the kid.

♪ I’m a fool to do your dirty work ♪

♪ Oh yeah ♪

♪ I don’t wanna do your dirty work ♪

♪ No more ♪

♪ I’m a fool to do your dirty work ♪

♪ Oh yeah ♪

Sorry about all the hubbub, guys. Just being careful.

♪ You have sent the maid home early ♪

♪ Like a thousand times before ♪

So, you all ready to do some business?

♪ I’m a fool to do your dirty work ♪

Yes, ma’am.

♪ I don’t wanna do your dirty work ♪

Rue: That was hon… Honestly, that was the craziest shit I’ve ever experienced. What was… The f*ckin’ dude with the long hair and the f*ckin’ gun? What was his deal? That was a f*ckin’ look, wasn’t it? Geez. Oh my god. And, and when, when he took me… F*ckin’ when old boy, he… When he took me to the back, I, well, I thought for sure I was gonna (clenched mumbling) Ah, f*ck. And that lady, let me just say, she is a f*cking gangster. She’s a f*cking gangster. They all work for her.

Aye, why you actin’ like that shit was fun, Rue? For real. You’re pissin’ me off. Actin’ dumb as f*ck right now. Goddamn, all smilin’ and laughin’ and shit. You know, half of that shit was your fault, too. F*ckin’ around, actin’ stupid.

Rue: Sorry! I’m j… I’m just saying, serious question. How many female drug dealers do you know?

Good ones?

Rue: Yes.


Rue: Case in point. I know what f*ck I’m saying. Shit’s gotta change.

(“Hypnotize” by The Notorious B.I.G. playing)

♪ Ha, sicker than your average ♪

♪ Poppa twist cabbage off instinct ♪

♪ Niggas don’t think shit stink ♪

♪ Pink gators, my Detroit players ♪

(music fades)

If I don’t find a bathroom, I’m gonna spend New Year’s with a f*cking UTI.

♪ Never lose, never choose to, bruise crews who ♪

♪ Do somethin’ to us, talk go through us ♪

♪ Girls walk to us, wanna do us, screw us ♪

♪ Who us, yeah, Poppa and Puff ♪

♪ Close like Starsky and Hutch, stick the clutch ♪

♪ Dare I squeeze three at your cherry M-3 ♪

♪ Bang every MC easily, busily ♪

Where’s the bathroom?

That way.

Thank you.

♪ Speak my piece, keep my piece ♪

Maddy, have you seen Cassie?

I thought she was with you.

No, we like got in a screaming fight and she got out the car in the middle of the road.

Wait, what?

Cashier: How are you doin’ tonight?



Cashier: Happy New Year.

(dark music playing)

Maddy: What were you fighting about?

She was drinking while I was driving.

Maddy: How long ago was this?

Like an hour and a half.

Maddy: Did you call her?

She’s not answering.

She always answers.

Lexi: I know. It’s f*cking weird.

(car radio blasting)

Cashier: Can I see your I.D.?

Thank you.

(“Nate Growing Up” by Labrinth playing)

♪ Ohh ♪

♪ Ohh, player, player, put the money on it ♪

What’s up, Cassie.

(mouth full) Hi.

You want somethin’ to wash that down?


What are you doin’ tonight?

Well, I was supposed to go to this party with my sister.


And then, we got into this really big fight.

Are you still with McKay?

Mmm, no.

What happened?

We broke up.


‘Cause… we were in different places.

Yeah, it’s the same shit with me and Maddy.

Yeah. I know.

But you’re like a, you’re like a relationship kind of girl, right?

Trying not to be. I didn’t mean it like that.

Like what?

Like, I’m, I’m just tryna focus on myself.

Nate: Why?

Because I keep making mistakes and not learning from them.

Would you like a ride to this party?


(“Dead of Night” by Orville Peck playing)

♪ The sun goes down, another dreamless night ♪

♪ You’re right by my side ♪

♪ You wake me up, you say it’s time to ride ♪

♪ In the dead of night ♪

♪ Strange canyon road, strange look in your eyes ♪

♪ You shut them as we fly ♪

♪ As we fly ♪

♪ Stark, hollow town, Carson city lights ♪

Cassie: Ah, ah, ah!

(Nate laughs)

Oh my god!

♪ We laugh until we cry ♪

I’m soaking wet!

♪ You say, “go fast,” I say, “hold on tight” ♪

♪ In the dead of night ♪

♪ Dead of night ♪

♪ See ♪

♪ See the boys as they walk on by ♪

♪ See ♪

♪ See the boys as they walk on by ♪

♪ As they walk on by ♪

♪ As they walk on by ♪

♪ It’s enough to make a young man… ♪

I’m actually worried. She was, like, very drunk.

I’m sure she’s fine. There’s no way Cassie’s gonna miss a New Year’s Eve party.

(“Runway” by Blaq Tuxedo playing)

(bangs on door)

I’m using the f*ckin’ bathroom!

Maddy: Nate?



Nate: Uh, just a sec.

(rattling knob)

Nate: Hold on! Yo, just a minute!

Open the f*cking door, Nate! I have to pee!

(banging continues)

Are you f*ckin’ crying?

Maddy: Can you open the door?

(Cassie crying, mumbling)

Shh, there’s no f*ckin’ reason to cry. You haven’t been caught.

Maddy: I have to pee, Nate! Open the door!

Nate: Calm down, and put your clothes on.

I can’t… She’s my best friend.

Maddy: Open the door!

(bangs on door)

I need to pee!

I’m just usin’ the bathroom! Just a second! F*ckin’ pee outside!

Are you taking a shit at a party?

(rap music continues)

Have you guys talked to Cassie?


Will you let me know if you do?


I can’t believe Maddy’s so sweet, though.

Yeah, sometimes.

Yo, you Rue’s friend, right?

Yeah, since like preschool. Sorry, I don’t know why I said that.

Nah, you good. You met where you met. Yo, what was your name again?


Lexi. I like that. That’s a nice name.


♪ Runway, runway, runway, runway ♪

♪ ♪

Aye, yo. Nah, bro. Get the f*ck down from there, bro.

Hell no.

♪ Runway, runway, runway, runway… ♪

♪ ♪


(music continues, muffled)

You’re so disgusting. I can smell it. I hear you taking a shit.

Nate: It’s okay.

Hurry the f*ck up!

(bangs on door)

Cassie (crying): We shouldn’t have done this.

I need you to focus, okay?

Maddy: What are you f*ckin’ doing?

I’m all tangled.

Okay, Okay.

I’m so scared. I’m really scared, Nate.

Nate: Hey, look at me. Look at me. I need you to trust me. I need you to trust me, okay?

Cassie: Mm-hm.

Maddy: Wipe your ass and come out. I need to pee!

I need you to listen to exactly what I say.

Maddy: I’m gonna break this f*cking door, Nate. Open the f*cking door!

(tense music playing)

(“Back That Azz Up” by Juvenile playing)

♪ Won’t you back that azz up ♪

♪ Call me Big Daddy when you back that azz up ♪

You waitin’ for the bathroom?

Do I know you?

Travis: A lot of people know me.

Do you know me?

Travis: Yeah. You’re the girl I met on New Year’s Eve standin’ in line for the bathroom.

Rue: (softly): Oh god. Shit. Ooh.

Rue: How you guys doin’? Happy New Year.

Wait, did you not wash your hands?

What the f*ck are you talking about, Maddy?

I can’t believe you took a shit at a party, and you didn’t wash your hands.

Yo, wassup? My name’s Travis. I would shake your hand, but I don’t wanna get Hepatitis.

Yo, can we talk somewhere in private?

No, because I have to f*cking pee. Move.

♪ Girl, you looks good, won’t you back that azz up ♪

♪ You’s a fine motherf*cker, won’t you back that azz up ♪

♪ Call me Big Daddy when you back that azz up ♪

(indistinct chatter)

(tense music playing)

♪ ♪

My goal tonight is to black out this entire f*cking stupid year. Okay?

Stop! (laughs)

Rue: Oh shit, sorry. What were you snorting?

I wasn’t. I wasn’t snorting anything.

Rue: Yeah, you were.

Nah… fixing this washing machine, actually. I work for, uh… Whirlpool. Yeah. You see it? It’s all messed up, so I’m just…

♪ Girl, who is you playin’ wit, back that azz up ♪

Rue: If you tell me what drugs you’re doing, I’ll tell you what drugs I’m doing.

Yeah, okay, deal.

Rue: Tight.

♪ Now drop it like it’s hot, drop, drop it like it’s hot ♪

♪ C-M-B make you drop it like it’s hot ♪

♪ Drop it like it’s hot, drop, drop it like it’s hot ♪



♪ ♪

F*ck my life.

(quietly): Oh god.

(faucet running)


(turns faucet off)

Wanna smoke?

(music continues)


Rue: F*ck. (grunts) Oh no.

You all right?

Rue: Uh… Mm-hm. I think I’m gonna need ya to check my pulse.

Are you… Are you for real?

Who was that guy?

Literally, the worst person in the world. Mm-mm, I don’t smoke random people’s weed.

(rap music playing)

Elliot: Fifty-six.

Rue: F*ck. Oh, I think I might be goin’ into cardiac arrest.

Are you f*ckin’ serious? Do you want me to call an ambulance?

Rue: Nuh-uh. No, I just… Uh, just, Adderall. Just crush up the Adderall. It’s in my sock.

Didn’t we do the same amount of drugs?

Rue: No.

Travis: Come on, we’ve met before. You know who I am.

Mm, I really don’t. I promise. (sighs) Okay, fine. All I know is your name is Travis. You were three years ahead of me, and you’re like a DJ or a producer, and you had a song on the radio. Whatever.

♪ ♪

Hi, have you seen Rue?

Lexi: No.

Yo, Happy New Year, Jewel!

It-it’s Jules.

Yeah, come on. I know your name, Jewel.

Have you seen Rue?

Um, yeah, she’s somewhere around here.

Is she?


(Rue groans)

Elliot: Oh, f*ck.

(“Uhuh Yeah” by G.L.A.M. & Colbie playing)

♪ I’m nodding, uh huh yeah ♪

♪ Uh huh yeah, uh huh ♪

♪ Bend them like Beckham in 02 ♪

♪ I don’t post much I ain’t post to ♪

Rue: There it is. Oh, there’s my heart. Hello, heart… Thought I lost ya. (chuckles)

Jesus f*ckin’ Christ. I’m not sure it’s a good thing we met.

Rue: What are you talkin’ about? You’re my new favorite person.

(both chuckling)

Rue: Ah shit. Ooh, thought I was gonna die for a second there. (laughs) Could you imagine just finding me dead? Oh man!

(electronic dance music playing)

Rue: Thanks.


Rue: Yeah.


(phone ringing)

So, did you, like, have a good Christmas, or are you Jewish or somethin’?

Yeah, well, my mom’s Jewish, but she always says if the Christians can steal Christmas from the Pagans, then the Jews can also.

You say the Christians stole Christmas?

Well, in order to convert the Germanic Pagans who, like, celebrated winter solstice and stuff, the Christians were like, “F*ck it. Let’s just say Jesus was born this day, and you can hang tinsel and stuff.”

How you just go and change the man’s birthday?

Well, in the same way King James was rewriting the Bible on one side of the castle, and had witches tryna turn his pee into gold on the other.

Yo, how the f*ck do you know all of this?

I don’t know, by reading.

Do you, like, not believe in God? Damn, Lexi… you f*ckin’ fearless.

Thanks. Do you believe in God?

Hell yeah, I believe in God.

Like, there’s a man sitting in the clouds… judging all of your actions and stuff.

Hell yeah.

Can I ask you a personal question?

What’s up?

How do you justify dealing drugs then?

Well, I mean, my Uncle Carl got diabetes from eatin’ too much McDonald’s. You don’t see nobody goin’ after they ass.

Yeah, but if I were God, I don’t know if I’d let McDonald’s CEO in Heaven. I’d be like, “F*ck that guy.”

Yeah, that’s a good point. I have to get back to you on that one.

(indistinct chatter)

Did you find her?

Jules: No.

Well, if you found her, we wouldn’t be hangin’ out.

Oh, yeah. It’s, probably, true.

I’m sorry.

When we first started hanging out, I thought we’d be pretty close, but… guess not. (chuckles)

I know. That’s my fault. I’m sorry…

No, I didn’t mean it like that. I didn’t even mean it.

No, but, I mean, it’s true, like… my world got too small, and… it didn’t feel good.

It’s okay.

(“DIRT” by B.o.B playing)

Maddy: I don’t, I don’t remember.

Travis: You don’t remember?

Maddy: Mm-mm.

Travis: Stop lyin’.

Maddy: I don’t listen to the radio.

Can I kiss you, baby?


Yo, yo. What’s good, man?

McKay, good to see you.

Been a couple weeks, man.


Hey, Happy New Year, McKay!

Wassup, wassup, Lex!

Happy New Year!

Uh, have you seen Cassie?

McKay: Uh, nah. I ain’t seen Cass since, um…

Lexi: Yeah.

McKay: Is she here, though?

Lexi: Uh, no.


Well, will you text me if you hear from her?

Yeah, I got you.

Nate: Yo, it’s good to f*ckin’ see you, bro.

Good to see you, man.


Are you good?

Yeah, no, I’m good, man.

You waitin’ on somebody?

(phone ringing)

♪ You ain’t got enough arch ♪

♪ She go crazy with the bone ♪

♪ It gon’ make the dog bark ♪

♪ She go crazy with the dome ♪

♪ Make a nigga fall apart ♪

♪ Make a nigga false start ♪

Why not?

‘Cause you’re the corniest guy I’ve ever met.

Travis: But you’re literally the sexiest girl I’ve ever met.

Maddy: Thank you. You have good taste.

Travis: Love at first sight.

Maddy: You are trippin’.

Travis: I’m trippin’?

Maddy: Yeah… you’re high.

(phone vibrating)

What the f*ck is that?

Come on, pick up.

(phone vibrating)

Yo, check it out. Some girl like passed out in here.

Who cares? You wanna dance?

Hell yeah, I wanna dance.

♪ By, by the time we roll, save these hoes, switcheroo ♪

♪ Drop, drop it to the dirt, drop it to the dirt, dirt ♪

♪ Put it in the dirt, dirt, put it in the dirt, dirt ♪

♪ Dig it in the dirt, dirt, drop it to the dirt, dirt ♪

(music continues, muffled)

Drunk Kid: Oh, f*ck. You’re really hot, but I’m still gonna take a shit, sorry.

Oh, okay.

(“Party Up” by DMX playing)

♪ Y’all gon’ make me lose my mind ♪

♪ Up in here, up in here ♪

Bro, I was just about to ask you.

Yeah, man, I f*cked up. But I’m doin’ everything I can to get her back.

♪ Up in here, up in here ♪

♪ Y’all gon’ make me lose my cool ♪

♪ Up in here, up in here ♪

♪ If I gotsta bring it to you cowards ♪

♪ Then it’s gonna be quick, aight ♪

♪ All your mens up in the jail before ♪

♪ Suck my dick, and all them other ♪

♪ Cats you run with, get done with, dumb quick ♪

♪ How the f*ck you gonna cross the dog with some bum shit, aight ♪

♪ There go the gun click, nine-one-one shit ♪

♪ All over some dumb shit, ain’t that some shit ♪

♪ Ya remind me of a strip club, ’cause everytime ♪

♪ You come around, it’s like I just gotta ♪

♪ Get my dick sucked, and I don’t know ♪

♪ Who the f*ck you think you talkin’ to ♪

♪ But I’m not him, aight, Slim, so watch what you do ♪

Oh my god! Oh my god. Oh my god.

I’m sorry. Are you okay?

You scared the f*cking shit out of me.

Happy New Year’s. I love you.

Aw, I love you, too.

(chuckles) You two are disgusting.

♪ Preacher tellin’ the truth and it hurts ♪

♪ Y’all gon’ make me lose my mind ♪

(slow, distorted music playing)

♪ You wack, you’re twisted, your girl’s a hoe ♪

Cassie, where the f*ck have you been? I called you, like, 500 times.

You did?

Why aren’t you answering the phone?

Maddy: Happy New Year, Cass! I love you.

McKay: Hey, Cass, can I talk to you for a minute?

Uh, yeah, totally.

♪ Up in here, up in here ♪

♪ Y’all gon’ make me go all out ♪

♪ Up in here, up in here ♪

♪ Y’all gon’ make me act a fool ♪

Why is Cassie acting so f*ckin’ weird?

I don’t know.

♪ Y’all gon’ make me lose my cool ♪

♪ Up in here, up in here ♪


Where’d you go? I was startin’ to miss you.

That’s not true.

Why would I lie? You’re, like, the coolest person in here.

(dark music playing)

Cassie: I just felt like we were in two different places or something.

But what was it specifically that made you feel like that?

It wasn’t anything specific. It was just a feeling.

You still feel that way? Like, we’re in two completely different places?

(quietly): F*ck. Cass, what’s wrong? I’m sorry. What’s wrong?

I shouldn’t be anybody’s girlfriend.

What does that mean?

I don’t know if I’m a good person.

All right.

I’m sorry…

All right, no. You ain’t gotta say nothin’ else to me.

Rue? Rue?

Rue: (echoing): Hey.

(“Madonna” by Tarik playing)

To… f*ckin’ New Year’s.

Nate: Yo… yo, you f*ck her?

Nah, man, we were just havin’ a conversation.

You tryin’ to tell me you took her in that room, and you didn’t dick her down?

McKay: Nah, I didn’t.

I don’t believe you. Come on, tell me the truth.

That’s the truth. I took her in the room, had a conversation. That was it.

Are you tryin’ to tell me that you didn’t miss those titties?

(chuckles) Come on, bro.

I knew it. I knew it. You dirty motherf*cker. You dirty motherf*cker. You wear a condom?

Come on, bruh, chill…

Nah, you wear a condom?

You dirty motherf*cker.

Chill, chill…

You dirty motherf*cker. Yo, where’d you come?

Bruh, chill.

Where’d you come?


Come in her mouth?

Bro, chill…

Yo, you come on her belly? Yo, you come in her cunt?

The f*ck is wrong with you, bro?

You come in her cunt?

Shut up, bro. Chill.


Happy New Year’s, motherf*cker.

Happy New Year.

What are you doing?

Rue: Smokin’ a little bit of weed.

Uh, could I talk to you?

Uh, yeah.

Uh, you can take my chair. I’m gonna get a drink.

Jules: How you doing?

Rue: I’m good.

When did you relapse?

Rue: Just f*ckin’ weed, Jules.

Jules: Like, when did you relapse?

Rue: You want me to be honest?


Rue: The night you left.

(somber music playing)

Yo, I gotta cut soon, but… I just wanna tell you that… talkin’ to you was one of the best parts of my whole year.

Yeah, right.

Why you always doin’ that shit?


I don’t know, like, doubting yourself and shit.

Oh, I don’t know. Do I do that?

Mm, kinda. Yo… can I, like, get your phone number or somethin’?

Yeah. Um, here.

I hope to see you soon, Lexi. Have a good night.

You, too.

Yo, what’s good?

Fezco (on phone): Start the car and be ready, man.

All right, sure thing.

Dude, I…

Ashtray: No, dude, I’m done for the night.

Wait, where are you going?

Yo, Fez said if you want a ride, now’s the time.

Rue: All right.

Rue: Well, um… I guess I gotta go.


Rue: All right.

(dark music playing)

♪ ♪

(car starts)

♪ ♪

Everyone, everyone! One minute till f*ckin’ New Year’s!

(all cheering)

(“The Lake” by Labrinth playing)

♪ ♪

♪ ♪

Rue: Jules? I’m, uh, I’m, uh… I’m sorry about that. I… I didn’t mean to be mean. Um… I don’t know. I’m just havin’ a tough time. You know? Uh…

♪ ♪

Rue: I just really miss you.

I really miss you, too.

Rue: I know that I never, uh, I never really said it before, but… I want to be with you.

♪ ♪

Rue: Say something.

♪ ♪

♪ Oh, oh, oh ♪

♪ Oh, oh ♪

♪ Oh, oh, oh, oh ♪

All (shouting): Happy New Year!

Fezco: Excuse me.

What’s up, man? You havin’ a good time?

(coughs) Yeah.

You make any New Year’s resolutions?

No, you?

A few.

The last time we talked, didn’t you say you wanted to kill me?

Yeah, well… It’s a new year, playboy.

Cassie: (gasps) Oh my god!

(all exclaiming)

Oh my god!

Fezco, stop!

(yelling): McKay! Stop.

Fezco, stop!


Fezco, get off of him!


Chill, chill, chill!

Chill, chill, chill! Come on, guys.

Careful, careful, careful.

Pick him up!

Relax, relax!

Is he okay? Is he okay?

Help me get him up! Help me get him up! Come on.

Wait, watch his head. Careful, careful!



(“I Just Died in Your Arms” by Cutting Crew playing)

♪ It must’ve been something you said ♪

♪ I just died in your arms tonight ♪

♪ I, I just died in your arms tonight ♪

♪ It must’ve been some kind of kiss ♪

♪ I should’ve walked away ♪

♪ I should’ve walked away ♪

(instrumental “Auld Lang Syne” playing)

♪ ♪

♪ ♪

Happy New Year.


Leave a Comment

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *

Read More

House of the Dragon - S02E05 - Regent

House of the Dragon – S02E05 – Regent | Transcript

Amid whispers of bad omens, the Greens consider how to fill a void on Aegon’s Council. Jacaerys sets out on a rogue mission to strike a deal. Daemon enlists Lord Willem Blackwood to help persuade the Brackens to bend the knee.

Weekly Magazine

Get the best articles once a week directly to your inbox!