The Girl in the Pool (2024)
Genre: Thriller
Director: Dakota Gorman
Stars: Freddie Prinze Jr., Monica Potter, Kevin Pollak, Brielle Barbusca, Dionysio Basco
Plot: A well-to-do family man must get through a surprise birthday party thrown by his wife shortly after he has hidden the corpse of his murdered mistress.
* * *
[whooshing]
[waves rolling]
[music fanfare]
[whooshing typewriter clicking]
[birds chirping]
[bird cawing, insects chirping]
[♪]
[sighs]
THOMAS: Am I a good person?
MAN [on speakerphone]: We’re doing the self-reflective thing today?
Yeah, I guess so.
Let me see, um, well…
You have two incredible kids, you got a gorgeous wife, you have a beautiful home, questionably decorated, but it’s fully paid off.
You got a great job, still got that handsome smile from high school, so are you still a good person?
Who cares, bro?
Honestly! I mean, stop going out of your way to make yourself miserable.
You tell Kristen your décor thoughts?
Come on, man, fuck, no!
I’m not trying to get my ass killed.
Your life is damn near perfect.
And I promise you that, there are people way worse off than you are.
[drone buzzing]
That too insightful for you?
No, sorry, it’s the neighbor’s damn drone in my yard again.
Again? Dude, when are you going to grow a sac?
Put that little shit in his place!
I don’t want to make a big deal out of it.
“I don’t want to make-” Stop being such a fucking beta!
You want me to come over there right now, bro, and smack that little acne-popper?
Let me finish up here, and I’ll come over there.
[knocking window]
What the hell was that?
I’ll call you back. Remember what I said…
[softly] Hi.
Sorry I’m late.
Happy birthday.
Thanks. [chuckles]
[door shuts]
I didn’t know you were still coming.
Yeah, that’s sort of the whole surprise aspect of this.
But if you don’t want to hang out with me, then…
No, no, no, stop, I always want to.
It’s just, it’s getting kind of late and I have dinner plans with Kristen later.
We gotta leave by 6:30.
It’s cutting it really close.
Come on.
I just want to celebrate with you.
Even if it’s short.
Besides, I brought you something.
If you want it.
One hour.
I’m serious.
Mm-hmm.
Wait, wait, where are you going?
[door shuts]
[♪]
Tom!
Whoa!
Fuck!
Oh, sorry!
What the fuck!?
I’m sorry!
I didn’t know you were standing there.
Oh…
Okay, I’m sorry if I scared you.
What is wrong?
It’s nothing.
Okay?
I’m fine.
Fine?
Okay, we have dinner,
I don’t want to lose the table, so…
Okay, I’ll hurry.
Hurry?
Yeah.
Fuck! Just hurry it up.
It sounds good.
Okay.
Shit!
I love you.
KRISTEN: Yeah, I love you, too.
[breathing heavily] Okay, okay.
Okay, all you gotta do is make it
through dinner, all right?
That’s all you gotta do.
You just have to make it through this dinner,
you sick piece of shit.
[♪]
[softly] Okay.
[♪]
[Kristen whispering] thank you for doing this…
I have to go.
Everything okay?
Yes, everything is good.
I’m just finishing up some work stuff.
I’m all yours for the rest of the night,
I’m just texting this guy here, okay,
that’s finished.
This matre’d is a fucking pain in the ass.
Like, just move the table time, please,
that’s all I’m asking.
You… son of a bitch!
I can’t believe you just did that!
I’m sorry.
It’s not funny!
This dress is expensive!
I’ll buy you a new one.
I’m taking it off.
There ain’t nothing stopping you.
Fine.
Sit down.
[♪]
I think I like it better this way.
Good.
Now.
What are you gonna do for me?
[♪]
KRISTEN: Thomas?
Honey?
Tom!
Hey.
Hi. You okay?
I don’t know.
I…
You don’t know, okay, well, I’m, I’m…
Shh, shh, shh.
You heard that, right?
I didn’t…
Shh-shh!
Hear anything.
Shh, shh, shh!
Something’s outside.
I didn’t hear anything.
Because you keep talking.
I am not talking. You’re shushing me,
I’m trying to get us out the door.
Shh!
Stop shushing me.
We’re gonna be late anyway.
Let’s just go, it’s probably…
Maybe one of the workers, or a squirrel.
Everything’s good, just relax, it’s your birthday,
we’re gonna have lots of fun!
Okay? I’m gonna call Sven again, let’s go.
Come on, honey.
Tom! Fuck’s sake… Tom!
[softly] Jesus Christ.
Where the fuck are my keys?
[screaming outside]
Okay. Whatever happens next,
just know I did this because I love you.
What are you doing? Tom, what are you doing?
Somebody’s outside!
No, stop, stop it.
Tom, stop, stop.
Stop!
I got this!
Stop, you’re acting insane!
Stop, I’m telling you right now.
You’re being ridiculous.
Put it down, that’s not going to do anything.
Put it down.
Thank you.
[Kristen sighs]
Who were you just talking to?
What?
When I came downstairs,
you were whispering to someone,
who was it?
No one.
Okay, so who were you on the phone with?
I told you, work.
Okay. Let me see your phone.
No.
Why?
Let me see yours.
[bottle rattles]
I’m gonna go get the gun.
Okay, you’re not going to get “the gun”.
It’s probably a neighbor.
Why don’t you go check?
Or I will.
Go.
Okay, just stay here.
Okay.
Surprise!
[music playing, overlapping conversations]
I genuinely don’t know what to say.
Let’s fuckin’ party, bro!
Yeah!
Okay, I… I’m gonna need a second to process this.
Thank you all for coming.
This is gonna be super fun.
Eat and drink and have fun,
get drunk and make yourselves at home.
MAN: Let’s get fucking turn
that shit up!
MAN: Watch out. Slip by, slip by.
Let’s go!
Surprise.
So… the dinner…
That was just a diversion.
ROSE: Who hired this DJ? They suck.
Hey.
Happy birthday, Daddy.
Hi!
I missed you.
I know, I missed you, too.
Are you about to cry?
It’s not that serious.
No, I just haven’t seen you in forever
and I wasn’t expecting any of this.
I know, I thought mom was gonna have an aneurysm.
We showed up early and almost blew the whole thing up.
Hmm, really?
Yeah.
Do me a favor and go
get your brother and grab the cake from the car.
Is that a two-person job?
Yeah, kind of, actually, it is.
Okay.
Happy birthday.
[background party music playing]
Oh, there he is.
Oh, couldn’t put in a few more steps before I…
I’ll be with you in a minute.
It’s good to see you, William.
Is it?
Man, my daughter pampers you.
Look at this.
Very, very impressive.
I mean, she’s put her heart at your feet, so…
let’s try not to step on it today, huh?
[sighs]
[softly] Go easy, go easy.
Ah, fucking stop!
I’m sorry, I didn’t…
I shouldn’t have spoken to you that way, I just…
I thought we agreed
that no marks.
I’m sorry.
I have to pee.
MIKE: Don’t you fuckin’ move!
[background party music playing]
Happy birthday, bitch.
Bring it in, dude.
Come here, come here, come on!
Thanks for coming, Mike.
Oh, dude, thank you.
You gave me a great reason
to get the fuck outta the house.
Newborns are no fucking joke, man.
I even got here early just to get
the fuck out of there, man.
It’s just…
You got here early?
MIKE: Yeah, I got here early.
How, how, how long ago?
It doesn’t matter.
All I know is I’m getting fucking lit tonight.
No, no, no, no.
What, what…
I need to know exactly what you saw.
Whoa, dude, dude, dude, chill, chill, chill.
What the fuck are you on?
And… you got any more for me?
It’s… sorry, man, I’m not on anything.
Oh, dude, that’s kind of fuckin’ lame.
You at least want a beer?
No, no, I shouldn’t.
Oh… fuck you, you’re drinking a beer
on your birthday, would you come on?
No, Mike…
No, I’m not letting you
talk me out of this shit.
Just get your ass down here and have a fucking beer.
It’s simple, right?
[♪]
Hi. Are you having fun?
Um…
Yeah?
How much longer do we have to do this?
Huh?
Do what?
The… party.
The party? Your birthday party?
It just started, and, I don’t know.
Are you not having fun?
Honey, it took me a month to plan this whole thing.
All these people here, are here for you.
Why are you asking me this?
All right, look, I was… I’m sorry.
I was just trying to get some sort of a time frame.
What? Like one hour, two?
One hour, two…
three, four.
Maybe all night.
Probably all night.
Okay? Can you handle that?
Can you at least try to have fun?
These people are here for you,
to celebrate you, your birthday.
I’m trying.
I know, it’s difficult, I know.
Okay, okay, I’m sorry, I’m sorry.
Hey, how’s it going in here?
It seems like it’s not going well at all.
Anything I can do?
We’re fine.
I was asking my daughter.
If I ever want your thoughts,
you should take me to the ER
because I’m feeling a little strokey.
Unless there’s something
you want to share, something important.
Dad, everything’s fine, stop.
It’s okay.
It’s his birthday, just try to be kind.
Which is super-cute when you’re seven.
But, yeah, let’s celebrate.
Why are we all staring at each other?
No reason.
None.
Here’s your ridiculously overpriced cake.
I got it all by myself, too.
Thank you, sweetheart, thank you so much.
Everyone get out, just go, leave.
ROSE: We’re literally already going.
Watch your mouth, get out.
Table right here for you, sir.
[general conversations, background music]
Are you okay?
Yeah, I’m fine, just…
Are you gonna fix things with mom?
Dad.
No, no, I’m going to take of everything, all right?
Just don’t… don’t worry about it.
[♪]
Ew! Dad, what the hell?
Sorry, I… I thought.
Wait, who… who is this?
This is Pietro.
He’s an ocean photographer.
He’s the head of that nonprofit we’re starting.
Mahalo.
And happy birthday.
Yeah, okay.
Look, can we just please keep everything
within eyesight, please?
Yeah, let’s go.
Don’t! Touch that.
What? What did I do?
Nothing, I… I wanna keep all of the party people
in the same place, so…
Yeah, you said that,
we’re just getting towels to go sit by the pool.
Right, but not from here.
Okay, truthfully…
I found mold.
Ew!
Yeah, “ew”.
And it’s disgusting, I know,
and I’m gonna deal with it later,
but just please don’t tell your mom right now,
I don’t need her stressing out about this, too.
If it’s black mold, you should get on that.
Thank you, Pietro, I definitely will.
Thank you.
[phone chiming]
You want me to get that?
Oh, my phone! Son of a bitch!
Oh, I finally found it.
I’ve been looking everywhere for this,
I’m sorry, it’s been making me crazy.
You guys go back to the party, I got this.
All right, there you go, man. Back at you.
Rose, don’t forget to wash your hands
just in case of the black mold.
[phone chiming]
[chiming continues]
[party music playing]
Hey, what’s up, dude?
How you doing? Good?
This is great.
Good turnout, man.
WOMAN: Nice statue!
You all right?
[overlapping conversation]
Everyone showed up.
Abe, even Abe made it.
Good old Abe.
Yeah, birthday boy.
Where’s Sally-Ann?
I have no idea.
She’s a real pill.
Oh, hi, guys!
MIKE: Hi.
You look good messy.
Thanks.
You’re cute… hi!
I got highlights this week, y’all notice?
Let me stand in the sun.
It looks good, right?
Oh, no, it does.
It looks like highlights.
I went to my mom’s…
My mom’s guy.
Life is a party.
My man!
[general conversations and laughing]
Doing well? Doing good?
[indistinct conversation]
Oh, my God, like stuck.
Hey, Thomas, hold on, where you going, bro?
Let me ask you, do you um… that stuff
we were talking about before?
What are you talking about?
The drugs?
No, not… what?
Yeah, I got the drugs…
No, I was talking about… no, no, wait, wait.
They wanna party.
He’s joking, he’s kidding.
It’s not…
Hope you guys are having fun.
Boo! Ha-ha, I found you.
You did.
I love this little cat and mouse game we have going on.
Ooh…
You been working out?
No, not really, no.
Oh, I think you have.
Oh, I can tell you and your son are related.
[imitating laser fire] I heart you!
That’s funny.
So tell me, how was your birthday?
Birthday’s been going great.
Good!
Just making the rounds.
Oh, I do have to go…
Wait a minute, you’re a little tense.
Do you need a little massage, are you sure?
Yeah…
Listen, I’m really good at massage,
the deeper the better.
I’m sure, I’m sure.
That guy, he looks pretty sore. And I gotta go say hi to…
Okay, well, come back,
I have a Richard Avedon story for you.
Hi, how are you?
Susan, like, completely messed up my hair,
and, uh… asked if I was legal.
Susan is a psychopath, and avoid her at all costs.
SALLY [distorted voice]: How are you?
Are you not having fun?
[distorted laughing]
Thomas!
MIKE: All I know is I’m getting fucking lit tonight.
SALLY: Hey, there, hot piece of mess…
like Vin Diesel with hair.
THOMAS: You got here early?
[distorted voices overlapping]
MIKE: Chill, chill, chill.
[distorted laughing]
[overlapping voices continue]
You’re gonna love it… turn that frown upside down, man.
[snapping fingers]
[overlapping voices continue]
[breathing heavily] Oh, God.
[phone chiming]
Okay, okay, just breathe.
Everything’s going to be okay.
It’s all gonna be okay,
you just gotta keep it together.
All right?
Come on, man.
[sighs]
[♪]
[♪]
[♪]
[♪]
[♪]
[sighs]
Come on, man.
Come on.
[softly] Jesus!
Everything come out all right?
Sorry, I… I didn’t know anyone was waiting.
Were you talking to yourself or your mistress?
What?
I see you.
My daughter may have her head in the clouds,
but I’m just waiting for you to slip.
And it’s coming.
[indistinct whispering]
ROSE: I just feel it…
THOMAS: What’s going on?
Nothing.
Nothing.
Well, it’s obviously not nothing.
She’s upset and you’re both clearly hiding something,
so just spit it out.
I told you he already knows.
Know what? What is it I “know”?
Nothing!
Nothing, it’s fine.
Where are you going?
Ask her.
Where is she going?
Tom, just let her go, it’s fine, okay?
You’re wasted already, huh?
Yay.
Jesus Christ.
Can’t even take a piss without you guys screaming.
What is it now?
Nothing.
Nothing?
Dad, no.
What?
I mean…
ALEX: Mom, did you want me to put the cake out?
Susan keeps asking about it.
I… I don’t care.
I mean…
What happened now?
[sighs]
BOTH: Nothing.
Shock to no one your dad was being a dick.
Do you know what? I am getting tired of this shit!
Excuse me?
Belittling me?
Humiliating me in front of my family?
You know what would be great, William?
If you could show me some actual decency
for five seconds.
I mean, shit, man, it’s my fucking birthday.
So I should just sit idly by
while you scream at my daughter,
and everyone else in the house.
Buckle up, buttercup.
I’m just getting started.
Well, I’m sorry, William,
but I’m going to be saying whatever I want
because this is my house!
That’s funny, because I don’t remember the deposit
coming out of your account.
But maybe I’m wrong on that.
[softly] Jesus Christ.
If you want to yell and scream like a girl scout
who lost her cookies, go nuts.
But please, at some point, just stop,
and admit to my daughter
what you’re really upset about, and remember,
you suck at hiding things.
Ready, go.
Dad?
Yeah?
Go outside.
Oh, come on.
This is the fun part.
No.
No?
This isn’t fun.
Great party, honey, everyone’s having fun.
Honey, I’m so sorry.
I’m gonna go check on your sister, this is ridiculous.
It’s okay.
I guess I’ll just get the cake later.
[Thomas sighs heavily]
So, are you and mom, like, getting a divorce?
What? No.
It kind of seems that way.
We’re not.
But like, how do you know?
Because I just… do.
Look, could we please shelve this conversation
for another time?
Yeah, yeah.
Dad, um…
Everything’s gonna be okay.
Your mother and I love each other very much.
I’m gonna fix this.
But, hey, I promise, okay?
[sighs] Okay.
[♪]
Does this mean we’re done fighting?
Maybe.
I want to hear you say it.
Say what?
That you love me.
[♪]
THOMAS: I love you.
I am in love with you.
But I have a family.
Could you please come back over here?
No.
You come here.
[♪]
I just wanna feel safe with you.
You are safe with me.
You have no idea what I’m risking being with you.
If Kevin found out, he would…
Hannah, look at me.
Please?
It would be bad for me.
Has he ever hurt you?
If I say yes…
would you leave her?
[door creaking]
Why are you creeping on me every five minutes!?
No, Rosebud, I wasn’t trying…
Don’t call me that.
I’m not a kid anymore,
I am an adult with valid feelings.
No, I can see that, if we could just calm down.
Stop trying to silence me!
Honey, you just need to be a little bit quieter.
Mom, I’m not doing this anymore.
“Doing”? Doing what? What are we doing?
I cannot go back down there
in good conscience,
celebrating and drinking and eating,
pretending that everything is okay,
while there are people out there suffering, dying.
It’s fine. Just say what you need to say
and just be done with this.
Dad…
I’m dropping out of school.
Every year, there are nearly five thousand deaths
related to malnourishment in Madagascar.
Most of which are children.
Okay.
I know how important college is to you,
and all the work you and Mom did getting me there,
but sitting in a classroom isn’t helping anything.
I need to be the change I want to see in the world.
[chuckling]
What? Why is that… why is that funny?
No, it’s not.
It’s not.
Are you mocking me?
No, no, of course not.
It’s just…
That’s what all the secrecy’s been about?
You were afraid to tell me that?
Yeah.
KRISTEN: No.
It’s your birthday,
and she just kind of wanted you to have a good day.
Don’t laugh, that’s rude.
Look, I just want you to be happy.
That’s all I want for everyone in this family,
is for all of us to be happy.
Sorry I lied to you.
It’s okay.
Just… no more secrets, please.
Except, maybe, from your grandfather,
I’m a little tapped out on his lectures.
I mean, it’s fine, I told him on the way over.
Um, sorry, I… I didn’t mean to tell him first, it just kind of
like slipped out.
No, no, no… wait.
Grandpa rode here with you?
KRISTEN: Mm-hmm
Yeah.
Which means you didn’t pick him up today, right?
No, no, I didn’t.
No, I was getting ready for your party.
Well, we’re going to ahead and go downstairs
because we have a house filled with people
for your birthday, okay?
Thank you for expressing all of this, let’s go.
Okay? Good job.
I told you he wouldn’t be mad.
Okay, Rosie, do me a favor,
sweetie, can you go down and make sure
that the guests are, like, they’re happy and having fun?
And we’ll be, we’ll be right behind you.
Yeah, okay.
We’ll be right behind you.
I love you, we love you.
[door opens and shuts]
We need to talk.
I don’t know how much more of this I can take.
What are you talking about?
I’m talking about the fact that I know
you’re hiding something
and I want you to tell me what it is
before I assume the worst!
Kristen, just tell me the truth.
You don’t get to demand things from me.
You don’t get to tell me how this part goes, Tom.
I’ve always had your back, always had your back,
even when it’s killed me.
I’m asking you, right now,
I’m telling you, you need to have mine.
[♪]
[Kristen sighs]
What are you doing?
Comforting you.
I don’t need to be comforted.
Okay.
I’m fine.
[Thomas sighs]
So, what do you wanna do?
I don’t know.
I mean, we should go downstairs and…
pretend that we’re a happy couple,
act normal.
Stop embarrassing ourselves and our kids.
Get through the night together, you know?
Do you think you can do that for me?
Yeah, yeah, of course, I can.
Thanks.
What if I say yes?
Would you leave her?
[drone buzzing]
I’m gonna kill that kid!
Thomas.
Thomas!
[♪]
You! Stop right there.
Now, I’ve had it with you, and that drone.
I catch it in my backyard one more time,
I’m going to smash it to pieces.
Fuck you.
The sky’s free.
Excuse me?
What are you gonna do? Hit me?
That’s what I thought.
Pervert.
Pervert!?
Yeah, you can tell your parents
I’ll be calling them, too.
Oh, no.
Not my parents!
What are you gonna do?
Tell them about your girlfriend?
[muttering] Shit!
[♪]
No, no, no, no.
Come on… come on.
Oh, fuck. [breathing heavily]
Oh, Jesus!
Oh, fuck.
[phone chiming]
Hello?
KRISTEN: Hey, did you get my text?
Uh, no, no, I was running.
I was calling the office.
I thought you were supposed to be at work all day.
I… I left early.
So where are you right now?
Um…
[breathing heavily]
Tom?
Running.
Running. To the house?
Yeah, wait… why, where are you?
Uh, errands, I’m running errands.
Listen, I had to push the reservation up,
so I’m on my way back now.
Can you be ready by the time I’m there?
How long?
Hello?
Hello?
Um, just one second.
One second, one second, I’m the middle of something.
Um…
45 minutes, 30 if I can beat traffic.
Just let me wrap this up so I can get home.
I’ll see you soon, okay?
Kristen will…
[grunting]
[breathing heavily]
[♪]
[exhales heavily]
[scrubbing]
Come on.
Damn it.
[breathing heavily]
Come on.
[car door closes, engine cranks]
[spraying]
[scrubbing]
[♪]
[breathing heavily]
What…
[squeaking]
[♪]
[lid slams closed]
[♪]
KRISTEN: Sorry guys, I found him.
Hiding.
What did you do to the poor man?
Trust me, I look better than I feel.
Don’t listen to him. I think you look great.
Thanks.
Oh, hey, did you see the gift I brought you?
No, not yet.
[whispers] PS-5.
Ha-ha! You’re welcome!
Speaking of ruining surprises.
I really hope I didn’t mess anything up earlier.
These heels just don’t mix with grass.
I almost broke both my ankles sneaking around back here,
and then my heels, they just hurt and I, I…
I feel like it is what it is, you know?
RANDALL: She trips on her shadow.
KRISTEN: You’re good…
Sneak attack!
Life of the party.
I’ve been looking for your ass everywhere, buddy.
Cheers.
WOMAN: Cheers.
Hello.
Michael O’Neil.
Regional Manager.
Friends call me Mike.
It’s a pleasure to meet you.
Nice to meet you, Mike.
Nice to meet you, both.
I wanted to tell you,
the guys and I are going to be hanging out in the back
for a little while.
Abe’s got something he wants to show us.
You know, if you’re interested.
THOMAS: Uh, maybe later.
Yeah, no problem.
I’ll… I’ll come find you.
Not if I find you first.
Ah huh.
Nice to meet you, man.
That’s your boy?
Yo, yo, yo!
No.
Interesting.
I’m sorry, I don’t…
I don’t know him and, um, that was really awkward,
and…
I’m going to go get some cake.
Ah, sure, you are.
No, hey, I didn’t mean…
With him.
I’ll be right back, I… I promise.
All right.
Have fun.
[♪]
I’m not gonna hurt you!
[glass shatters]
What… stop!
Look, just listen to me, please.
You come any closer and I’ll tell my dad
everything I saw today.
What, what, what did you see?
You know what I saw.
Aiden.
Take another step and I’ll slit your throat.
Slit my throat? What the fuck!?
Relax! I just want the footage,
your drone footage.
Why would I show you that?
[sighs]
Because I’m going to make you a deal you can’t refuse.
How much longer is this gonna take?
You want the footage or not?
[keyboard clicking]
Okay.
Here.
I can’t believe you recorded all this.
You’re a sick, twisted kid, you know that, right?
Me? You’re the one doing it.
[Hannah moaning]
Can you just leave the room, please,
so I can watch this alone?
You think I’m brand-new?
You’re just gonna delete the footage
and cheat me out of a deal.
Then turn around or close your eyes, something.
[sighs]
[Hannah moaning]
You really have a brand-new Play Station?
Yes.
Can I…
Yes, just be quiet!
[computer beeping]
What?
Hey, hey, hey.
What is this, where’s the rest of it?
The rest… of what?
Kid, the day I’m having,
you do not want to mess with me right now.
That’s everything.
Aiden.
I swear.
You’re nothing but a little con artist,
that’s what you are.
What is that?
[♪]
Oh, God damn it!
Uh, don’t tell Kristen
you’ve caught me eating cake, please.
Keep this one between us.
Yeah, good.
Appreciate that.
Have a seat.
Nah, you look busy.
I’m not, and it’s okay.
Sit down.
I’m probably not gonna ask you again…
ever, I mean, I don’t mean right now, I mean ever.
Have a seat.
There you go, that almost looks comfortable.
Look, I feel awful about what happened earlier.
I should’ve never let it get that far.
Well, that’s what a midlife crisis will do for you.
And for the record, I do not think
you’re the biggest asshole that ever lived.
I just always wanted better for my daughter, that’s all.
You can understand that.
Yeah, I screwed up real, real bad.
[clicks tongue]
I wish I could feign surprise.
On the day of your wedding,
Kristen said something to her mom and I,
very afraid that she loved you too much,
that you could hurt her.
She was afraid what she would forgive,
the depths of her own sadness she could reach
just to be with you.
I told her she was crazy.
Thanks for proving me wrong.
I got lucky with Lorraine, she forgave me my infidelity.
But… that doesn’t mean I don’t curse myself
every single day.
It’s burned in there, deep.
You don’t want that.
You don’t want any part of that.
I… I don’t know what to say.
Whatever this is,
whatever this is,
fix it.
Not just for your family,
but for your own peace of mind.
You don’t want that burning a hole in your head, so…
[men laughing]
[overlapping conversations]
This is where we are!
What’s up boss man?
We were just looking for a place to, you know.
It’s fine, we were just all clearing out of here.
Aw, come on, don’t be a Debbie Dow…
Hey, Abe over here has got some serious dank.
You wanna get in? Come on.
Come on.
All tap in.
Pops?
Enjoy, fellas, besides…
I’ve done more drugs than you’ll ever look at.
I don’t think drugs are your thing, too weak.
[laughing]
My man.
I like him.
I like him, too.
Hop up on this.
Careful! Careful!
Come on, careful.
Hey, man, relax. You need to hit this.
[laughing]
Now, I’m warning y’all.
This is some strong-ass shit, all right?
Ooh, yes!
Yo, this party is litty titty,
up here in the burbs.
Cheers, yeah.
THOMAS: Yeah, just go easy on the bin, okay?
[tapping bin]
So, uh…
Where were you at earlier today, huh?
What?
Mm-hmm.
Uh-huh.
What?
Yeah, man, we was gonna invite you to lunch, but…
your assistant said that you took off early or something.
ABE: Yes, sir.
Yeah, she did say that,
because I… I did, I just wanted to get out of there.
You’re hiding something, Tommy, or…
FRIEND: Ah… yes.
What did you hid from us?
What are you doing, man?
Let us in on it, come on.
Come on.
What you hiding, man, huh?
Come on, boss man…
What’s the roll, man? You sure?
Any big deals on the horizon
that we should be excited about?
Mm-hmm.
Full disclosure.
Come on, come on.
Sorry, sorry to disappoint, guys.
All right.
That’s all you, boss man.
Yeah!
Birthday boy’s gotta do the honors, come on.
No, no, no, I’m… I’m not gonna do any of that.
What?
[overlapping conversation]
No, no, no, no, no, no.
He’s got a point.
This is the birthday boy, okay.
If he wants to be a pussy, he can be a…
He can be pussy.
No, no, no. You’re right, you’re right.
Pussies get fucked.
Today you came out of a pussy,
so you have the right to be one, also.
[laughing]
Guys, it’s just that my kids are here.
Aw, man, fuck the kids!
Nobody cares about your kids.
Yeah!
Do you know what would be really fun
is if we just all went back to the party!
Oh… hell, no.
One hit and we’re…
Hit this, come on.
Birthday hit, birthday hit, birthday hit.
Come on, guys.
Birthday hit,
birthday hit…
Birthday hit, birthday hit…
Careful! Careful of the bin!
Birthday hit, birthday hit! [chanting continues]
[rattling in bin]
What’s that?
What, what?
Oh, that, no, no, no, no.
That’s mold.
Here, give me the joint,
give me the joint.
Yeah!
Aw, yeah!
Birthday hit!
That’s my boy.
Birthday joint, birthday joint,
[whispering] birthday joint, birthday joint.
What the fuck was that?
Aw, that’s just sad.
You’re like a beat up old woman.
Man, you’re over there sippin’ tea.
Hit that shit, dude.
Hit that shit, inhale from your balls.
Diaphragm…
[♪]
[distorted voices overlapping]
Whoa, whoa, whoa, who is that guy by my wife?
MIKE: The hot one?
You don’t know?
Let’s fuck his ass up.
I feel like I do,
I just can’t figure out from where.
Yeah, that’s the worst.
Oh, my God.
Huh?
My knees are water.
Knees are what? What?
I told you not to take that last hit!
[men laughing and joking]
Hey, can I talk to you?
Hey, I thought you were going to get cake.
What?
You said you were going to get some cake.
Oh, yeah, right, I ate it.
Was it good?
It was delicious.
Was it? Good.
Hey, man, I’m Kevin.
KRISTEN: Oh, sorry, this is Kevin.
I’m sorry.
It’s been a really long day.
Okay, um…
Yeah, I’m sure.
As I was telling your beautiful wife, here.
That, uh… I’m just trying to find my wife.
KRISTEN: She’s beautiful.
KEVIN: Thank you.
[♪]
I… I don’t…
I don’t know her.
Just, I was able to get into her Uber account,
and the last location she came to was here.
And now I’m trying not to panic, but…
Her phone keeps going to voicemail.
Which is odd because we talk all the time.
Yeah, Tom?
THOMAS: Hey, hey.
You drove grandpa here this afternoon, right?
Ew, Dad, you look deranged.
Rose, for the love of God,
please just answer the question.
Okay, yes, I drove him here.
Do you guys want some cake?
Not now, Alex.
And your mom,
she didn’t pick him up today because…
She still had to pick up the cake
and then she had to get the food, so whatever, yeah,
she asked me to do it.
So she was out all day.
Yeah.
You’re sure.
Yes!
How? How do you know
she wasn’t here at the house?
Because I literally was on the phone with her
all afternoon while she was at the store and everything.
It’s true, I was with her all day.
How high are you right now?
Really, how fucking high are you right now?
I thought we agreed to get through this night together.
I thought you and I agreed
to get through this night together.
Yeah I thought too, but…
Look at you.
[whispering] How do you know that guy?
What guy?
The one you were just all buddy-buddy with
a second ago.
Are you jealous of a guest?
I don’t know.
No, no, Kristen, I’m just trying to piece this together!
You need to get a fucking grip right now.
Calm the fuck down.
You’re acting insane, okay?
I don’t know.
Why are you doing this?
Why am I doing what, Tom?
I’m not doing anything, I thought you knew him…
Then why is he here?
I don’t know, why he’s here.
I don’t know him,
I thought you knew him,
I don’t know, I never met the man before in my life.
Okay?
Now calm the fuck down.
PIETRO: Maybe you should just ask him yourself?
Maybe.
KRISTEN: You’re scaring the shit out of me right now.
And the kids.
Okay. Okay, okay, no one panic.
But that guy over there is a very dangerous man.
Don’t talk to him… don’t even look at him.
But don’t worry, I got this.
Okay, you need to stop.
You do not… stop.
Knock it off, Tom.
I’m not letting him get away with this.
Get away with what?
It’s time to expose this mother…
Tom.
This guy.
Tom… Tom…
I gotta do something.
Fuck. Stop!
[♪]
It’s a set-up.
That’s all this is… he’s trying to set you up.
But you’re smarter than he is.
So everything’s going to be fine.
It’s fine, it’s fine, it’s fine.
It’s fine, it’s fine, it’s fine.
[sobbing]
[muffled screaming]
[banging on door]
[doorknob rattling]
One second.
One second.
[knocking continues]
One second.
Hey, it’s me.
Okay, sorry.
It’s a nice bathroom.
Look, I may be overstepping here,
but truth is, I really care about you, dude,
so I’m just gonna lay it all out there,
because I am absolutely done with the bullshit, okay?
I can make people.
Before you say anything, I know what you’re thinking.
You got it all together, right?
That you can handle all of this shit on your own.
[slapping palms] I get it. Listen to me.
I’ve been watching you,
and I know, okay?
You’ve been taking early lunches,
coming into work, smiling and shit, right?
Hell, I’ve been watching you all night,
run around, looking over your shoulder and shit.
Okay? I know exactly what’s going on.
You really need a new account.
And I want to be a part of it.
Now, look, before you say anything,
I know exactly why you didn’t
say anything in front of the boys.
I get it, you can’t trust those fucking tadpoles.
But not me, no.
I want to be your partner.
I am standing here, in real time, with you,
wanting to be your partner.
We’re just middle management, Mike.
Duh-duh-duh-duh.
For now, for now.
Yeah, look, I want to go all the way with you.
And don’t, don’t worry,
I’m not gonna press the fucking details
and I’m not gonna ask for your trust.
I’m going to earn it,
and I’m going to earn it starting with…
this!
Is that cocaine?
I have no fuckin’ idea, but it could be.
Yeah, it is the ultimate bonding experience,
and I ain’t gonna let you leave this restaurant
until you jump on this fuckin’ wagon with me
and join me for the ride.
What do you say? Okay?
Happy birthday, motherfucker, huh?
Come on, let’s get into it, dude!
[♪]
Keep the party going… I need five.
On it.
[party music playing]
Hey, it’s time, you set “Despacito”?
Yeah, could you…
[♪]
[gun clicking]
She ended up owning a wine tasting
and chemical peel clinic.
I was her little tryout.
My face is going to be better than a baby’s ass!
[distorted laughter]
HANNAH: You have no idea what I’m risking being with you.
HANNAH: If Kevin found out, he would,
he’d be really smart and really ruthless.
KEVIN: I’m just trying to find my wife.
And the last location she came to was here.
[slow party music playing]
ROSE: What is he doing?
I don’t know.
This is so sad.
Also kind of beautiful.
Maybe it’s just me, but I feel moved.
Yeah, I’m gonna go find Mom so she could put him to bed.
HANNAH: Tom? Tom, please, Tom!
Hey, Thomas.
Are you okay?
Hey, man, you don’t look so good… you all right?
Yeah, I just gotta find him.
Okay, wait, I think you’re too high, look,
why don’t you stand by Lilly, I’ll go grab Kristen.
Yeah, I got it, I got it…
Tom.
Oh, hey, look, hey,
I didn’t mean to catch you off-guard.
Yeah, I know who you are, Kevin,
and I know why you’re really here,
so let’s just cut the bullshit.
The what?
Came back to the scene.
For what?
So you could go watch my life unravel?
How long have you been planning this for?
What the fuck?
I’m just trying to find my wife.
Yeah, nice try.
But I already know everything,
and I’m not letting you get away with it.
Okay…
Here’s what’s gonna happen.
You and I are gonna go inside,
and we’re going to discuss things there.
Let’s go… now.
Now.
There?
Yeah.
I don’t know where I’m going.
Straight up the stairs.
Is she up there?
What? No. Just keep moving.
Don’t even look at me.
KEVIN: Okay. Fuck.
Was that necessary?
I want you to think about
how quickly this can go bad.
Hannah warned me about you.
All I have to do is claim self-defense.
Wait a second.
So you do know Hannah.
You know my wife?
What the hell, man.
I want to see my wife, or you take me to her.
Why would you ask me that?
Where is she?
I am not going to tell you that.
Just take me to my wife, right now!
No.
Whoa, whoa, whoa, okay.
Okay, hold on.
Hey, I can tell you right now,
you and I, we are not on the same page.
No shit.
I’m a pacifist, okay?
I’m all about non-violent resolution.
Yeah, but you’re okay hitting your wife, right?
What? I never hit anybody.
Then why would she say that?
I don’t know, I don’t know.
Okay? She’s done a lot of crazy shit.
Hey, whatever she said.
Tom, is it?
Okay, she’s messing with your head.
You may think you know her,
but I promise you, you don’t know her like I know her.
Okay, fine, just don’t point that thing at me!
I’m deathly afraid of guns.
You fucking disgust me.
Just tell me what the hell you want.
Whatever it is, whatever it is, I’ll do it.
Nothing had to be like this.
And then you had to come and ruin everything!
But you went way too far, man.
[shuddering] Okay.
And now we’re all fucked.
[♪]
[computerized voice on phone]
Stop, stop, stop it, stop it, stop it.
I’m gonna, I’m gonna pass out.
Wait, wait, wait, wait.
Did you fuck my wife?
[blow lands]
[breathing heavily]
[moaning]
[♪]
[ties tighten]
[distant laughing]
[siren whooping]
[phone vibrates]
[muttering] Dick.
[phone vibrates]
Come on.
[phone vibrates]
Dad?
Shit.
This is not…
Come with me.
Uh, wait, who is that?
Come on.
What the fuck happened?
Okay, I know that probably looks…
really bad,
and it doesn’t make much sense,
but I promise you,
I’m going to explain everything later.
Just don’t say anything until after I have a chance
to speak to your mom, please.
Everything’s going to be fine.
I’m going to fix this.
Yeah, kind of keep saying that,
and everything keeps getting worse.
Alex, I need to know you’re not gonna say anything…
not to Rose, not your mom, not anyone.
Please, kid, I really need you trust me on this.
Okay.
Thank you.
Thank you, thank you so much.
That means the world to me.
ALEX: Is that her husband?
Who’s husband?
The woman, Dad.
The one from the pool.
[♪]
I need you to tell me exactly
what it is you’re talking about.
[choking tears] I just wanted to help.
What did you do, Alex?
I’m sorry, I…
I didn’t know her husband was gonna show up. Fuck.
[whispering] Okay, okay, Alex, Alex.
What did you do?
I…
I called your office and they said
that you took the afternoon off.
I just wanted to come over and see
if you wanted to hang out before dinner, so…
I came over, and I heard voices in the backyard.
So I walked around to see if you were back there.
[kissing and soft moaning]
But I heard her talking, too, about leaving Mom,
and it just… I knew that you didn’t want to, but…
she wouldn’t take no for an answer.
It all happened so fast.
[birds chirping]
[♪]
[blow lands]
[blows landing]
I was so scared on how you’d react, so I ran.
[sniffles]
But when I came back for the party,
and everything had been taken care of,
and the cops weren’t called,
I knew that we were in this together.
But her fucking husband has to show up,
and what, is he dead, too?
No, no, no, no.
No, no, no, no, he’s not, he’s not, he’s not dead.
Look, we had… we had a fight,
he’s unconsciousness, that’s all you saw.
Okay. Okay.
What if we make it look like he did it,
and we can clear both of our names of this
and Mom never has to know.
Would that work?
Dad? Just please tell me that’ll work,
could we just do something?
No, Dad.
It’s okay, it’s okay.
Dad, no.
What are we gonna do?
I’m gonna fix this.
You’re not good at that.
Quick, grab his feet, quick.
What?
His feet, grab them.
Okay.
To the closet on three.
One, two, three.
What the fuck are you doing?
What are you doing?
What are…
Okay, okay.
Nobody move.
No one’s going anywhere until we figure this all out.
What kind of sick shit are you two doing?
This is not what it looks like.
Oh, my God, is that a gun?
[softly] Oh, shit.
Yes.
KRISTEN: Alex, come here.
Alex, come behind Mom, right now.
Kristen, I can explain.
You stay there.
Don’t you fucking move.
Don’t you dare move.
Alex, please…
No, Mom, this isn’t his fault, okay?
He was just trying to help!
Alex, just let me explain.
Just give me five minutes, I’ll explain everything.
Then you can go downstairs and call the cops yourself,
if you want.
Dad, no, we ca…
Look, I will tell you everything.
Anything you wanna know, just give me five minutes
before we all make this even worse.
No bullshit.
Tell me the fucking truth.
What the fuck is going on right now?
[sighs]
I’ve been having an affair.
Did you hear what I just said?
You think I’m stupid?
Really? You think I’m that dumb?
Of course I know.
I’ve known for months.
You did?
Yes, I did.
I’ve been meeting with lawyers, so…
Happy birthday, surprise.
You were gonna leave me?
This is not about me!
Fucking selfish prick, are you kidding me right now?
Why is he on the ground, tied up?
What the fuck is going on?
Right, I was getting to that.
You’re not talking fast enough.
Fucking say what you need to say.
Look, I just need everyone to know that…
this is the absolute lowest moment of my life.
No shit, Tom, no shit.
I mean…
I’m so sorry.
[Thomas breathing heavily]
I’m a liar.
A cheat.
A shitty husband, a shitty dad,
and a shitty role model, and you all deserved better.
And everything that has led up
to what’s going on right now
is entirely on me.
I was reckless.
And I let that jeopardize our family.
But I would gladly give my life
to take it all back and make this right again
if I could.
I would die for anyone in this room!
I feel like this is all my fault.
Your fault, honey?
How is this your fucking fault?
This is not your fault,
it’s not your fault, it’s…
KRISTEN: Tom. What happened?
I need to know right now, why you did what?
I don’t even know what the fuck you did.
Dad was having an affair with this guy’s wife and…
I killed her and he hid the body outside.
What the fuck, Alex!?
ALEX: I don’t know what to say, could we just…
ROSE: Why would you do that!?
Don’t look at me like that, Mom,
I don’t want… I don’t want to go to jail.
Tom, please tell me this isn’t true.
Mom, please, I’m sorry, okay!?
ROSE: How could you do that?
ALEX: I don’t know!
ALEX: I was just… I wanted to save the family!
I know I let things get out of hand.
But I do have a plan.
It’s a really good plan.
That’s right, and if you could just trust me
to do the plan,
it really is the best way to protect our family.
Especially our children.
ROSE: This is so fucked.
I don’t want anything to do with this.
Definitely don’t want to be the person
that sends anybody to jail.
Okay.
Thank you, Rose.
But this has to be unanimous.
[sniffs]
What do you need us to do?
THOMAS: Okay.
Okay, I just need all of you to go back to the party
and start getting people to leave.
That’s it?
That’s it, that’s the plan.
Okay, okay.
You heard Dad, so…
Let’s do it.
This is actually insane.
Thank you.
[♪]
[laughing]
She hates me.
She doesn’t hate you.
Are you mad at me?
LILLY: Kristen, are you okay?
Is everything okay?
KRISTEN: Yeah, everything’s good.
Is Tom okay?
Yeah, he’s just tired,
so we’re gonna kinda call it a night.
[door shuts]
Hey.
There he is.
LILLY: Can I take a family photo of you guys?
This’ll be great.
RANDALL: That’ll be a good idea.
Yeah, you look so good.
You sure?
Yeah.
You take my purse. Rose!
Rose, come on.
RANDALL: Rose, come on, come on, family photo, let’s go,
birthday, remember?
RANDALL: Come on.
LILLY: Just one.
Or two, two, two.
LILLY: Hey, guys, get in really close.
All right, look a little happy.
Smile.
Okay, come on, you can do better, one more.
Can you smile?
RANDALL: Don’t you want to center it?
LILLY: Okay, I will center.
No, I’m fine, I got this. Yeah, okay.
Okay, smile.
Okay, love it.
Perfect.
MIKE: Silly boy!
Tommy, Tommy, get your ass over here.
You gibroni.
Come on, speech!
Birthday speech!
MIKE: Come on. Everyone.
ROSE: What’s going on?
[chanting] Birth-day speech.
Come on.
You tall glass of poop juice,
get your ass over here.
Come on!
[chanting] Birthday speech, birthday speech.
[cheering]
All right, everybody,
we’re trying to wrap things up,
so I’ll make this quick.
First off, thank you, everyone,
for making it out tonight, and, of course…
[phone ringing]
OPERATOR: 911, what’s your emergency?
THOMAS: My name is Thomas, I’d like to report
a domestic dispute.
I need the police here immediately.
Because there are some things
worth protecting at all costs.
[blow lands]
We’re looking for the homeowners.
That would be me.
Whoa!
Gun!
[shouting]
What the fuck, dude!?
What is happening?
Shit!
[cuffs clinking]
[♪]
THOMAS: It wasn’t supposed to happen like this.
[moans]
I was just trying to protect my family.
[police radio chattering]
[♪]
THOMAS: I’m a very lucky man, as most of you well know,
far luckier than I deserve.
And it got easy to take that for granted.
But this world’s a crazy place,
and you never know what’s gonna happen next, so…
Always cherish the people you love.
Love them lavishly, honestly,
and I’m sure you’ll do
a better job of it than I have.
Stay on the lookout for the truly
beautiful things in life.
Like the love from someone you don’t deserve.
Or the embrace from those you cherish the most.
Be on the lookout for second chances
to do the right thing.
Because some things are worth protecting at all costs.
[♪]
[car door shuts, ignition starts]
[indistinct voice on police radio]
DISPATCHER: We found a body in a pool bin.
This is a homicide, secure the crime scene.
[♪]
