Daddio (2023)
Genre: Drama
Director: Christy Hall
Stars: Dakota Johnson, Sean Penn, Marcos A. Gonzalez, Shannon Gannon
Plot: A woman taking a cab ride from JFK engages in a conversation with the driver about the important relationships in their lives.
* * *
[INDISTINCT ANNOUNCEMENT OVER PA]
Hola, ruya. Where to, mami?
44th, between 9th and 10th.
MAN: Here you go, buddy.
FEMALE NARRATOR: Feel the magic of the city that never sleeps.
From the lights of Broadway to the paths of Central Park.
[EXHALES]
Find your playground in New York…
[DOOR OPENS]
[DOOR CLOSES]
CAB DRIVER: All right.
[CAR HONKING]
CAB DRIVER: God damn it.
Fuckin’ asshole.
[CHUCKLES SOFTLY]
[SIGHS]
[SOFT, MYSTERIOUS MUSIC PLAYING]
[CAB DRIVER EXHALES]
[PHONE BEEPS]
44th and 9th, huh?
Yep.
Midtown.
Good ol’ Midtown.
You are my last fare of the night.
Yeah?
Yeah.
I won?
[CHUCKLES]
You fuckin’ won, sweetheart, you did. [CHUCKLES SOFTLY]
What do I get for winning?
Anything you want.
[BOTH CHUCKLE]
Yeah.
I had a rough day of it.
Short trips, barely nothing extra.
This fuckin’ business with the credit cards.
I mean, when it was cash, people throw you 10, 20, 50.
Fuckin’ Monopoly money, right?
But you swipe that plastic, you got time to think.
Staring at all those little numbers, before you know it, I get fucked up the asshole.
These fuckin’ apps, all of ’em.
Get a coffee, burger, soap, socks, wine, water, weed, fuckin’ Chinese takeout.
You can get all that shit and never reach for your purse.
Nah, not even for tip.
I mean, salt used to be money.
Motherfuckin’ salt, the same shit you sprinkle on your eggs.
You know, every morning you toss that cheap-ass shit on your eggs with no idea that people used to die for it.
Tea, coffee, same thing.
All that shit you gloss over at the grocery store, at one point in time, humans fuckin’ killed each other for it.
Bird’s eye view of all that shit?
Over the years, you see money go from salt to gold to paper.
And now, money, it ain’t nothing but an idea, just little numbers on a screen.
Can’t touch it, can’t bury it, can’t put a little X that marks the spot.
Nah, you just tie it to a fuckin’ butterfly and send it up into that cloud up there.
But one of these days, I’m telling you, that cloud’s gonna open up and it’s gonna pour acid rain down all over our dumb faces.
[BOTH CHUCKLE]
Well, I got you covered.
Yeah?
My bag in the back should settle us.
How?
It’s full of salt.
[CHUCKLES]
That’s good. That’s good.
For that, you can use a damn credit card, honey.
[CHUCKLES SOFTLY]
It is what it is at this point.
I mean, cabs, yellow cabs are like fuckin’ Blockbuster.
You know?
Ten years’ time, there ain’t gonna be no yellow cab no more.
And all the other guys, the ones with the apps, the ones that are, you know, taking over, they’re gonna be nothing but a blip on the screen in a fuckin’ blink of an eye, all said and done.
Yeah, you’ll order up a car on your phone just like before.
But when you hop in, it ain’t gonna be no human behind the wheel, I can tell you that.
You’ll order up a car, and that fuckin’ car will drive itself to wherever the fuck you want to go.
It won’t speed, it won’t stink, it won’t make you sick.
Won’t ever get lost.
Might even ask you how your day was.
[CHUCKLES]
Fuckin’ apps.
Fuckin’ apps, man.
Want some radio?
Not really.
Yeah.
Okay.
It’s nice you’re not on your phone.
You don’t have to keep talking to me or nothing but…
Just nice, you know?
To see a human not plugged in.
[CHUCKLES SOFTLY]
What’s your name?
[CHUCKLES SOFTLY] Why?
I just like to know people’s names.
CAB DRIVER: Fuck, you really are human.
That’s sweet.
Clark.
Clark.
You thought I’d say Vinny or some shit.
[CHUCKLES SOFTLY]
I don’t know what I thought.
Nah, it’s fine.
[IN ACCENT] I mean, Clark. Clark…
[BOTH CHUCKLE]
[NORMAL VOICE] …has a house in the Hamptons, he plays tennis, he goes to the opera and shit.
I’m never, ever going to be that guy.
What name would you choose if you could?
Vinny.
Vinny.
Vinny. Classic.
Of course.
[ENGINE ACCELERATING]
CLARK: So you live here, right?
GIRLIE: I do.
Yeah.
Your little outfit gave you away.
My little outfit?
It says a lot about you.
What does it say?
That you can handle yourself.
[CHUCKLES SOFTLY]
How could you possibly know that?
It ain’t that difficult to read people.
I mean, you jumped in, business as usual, you turned off that damn little screen back there ’cause you already know what Broadway shows are fuckin’ playing.
Didn’t even think to reach for your seatbelt.
Why would you?
Had enough rides, in and out. Am I right?
What else?
You gave me cross streets instead of some recited address from your phone.
I can tell you’re not concerned with the meter,
’cause you already know JFK’s a flat rate.
Impressive.
Yeah.
I’m not claiming to be some Sherlock or nothing, just a guy who pays attention.
You’ve had a long day, you’re tired.
You wanna go home, take a shower, sleep in your own bed, and you got in line for a motherfuckin’ taxi.
Now that’s a New Yorker that pays attention.
Someone who knows what the fuck’s going on.
And you’re not afraid to look me in the eye.
[CHUCKLES SOFTLY]
Like I said,
you can handle yourself.
I like to think so.
[WIND HOWLING]
[SPITS]
[WINDOW CLOSING]
[CLARK EXHALES]
[PHONE BEEPS]
[PHONE CHIMING]
[SOFT PIANO MUSIC PLAYING]
[MELANCHOLY MUSIC PLAYING]
Where are you flying in from?
Uh, Oklahoma.
What’s in Oklahoma?
I grew up there.
[SIGHS WEARILY]
What about your accent?
Sorry, what?
Your accent.
My accent?
Yeah.
Don’t people from Oklahoma [IN ACCENT] talk like this?
[CHUCKLES SOFTLY] Oh.
Not all of us, apparently.
Where are you from? What part of the state?
[SIGHS SOFTLY] Just a tiny little town.
What’s the town?
You’ve never heard of it.
What’s the town?
[CHUCKLES SOFTLY]
Okay, so Oklahoma is shaped like a pan, right?
So if my arm is the panhandle…
Yeah?
Then I grew up here.
The armpit.
Of Oklahoma. [CLICKS TONGUE]
CLARK: What’s it called?
[SIGHS SOFTLY] Gage.
Gage, Oklahoma.
You got it.
CLARK: I, honest to God, would never have guessed Oklahoma.
GIRLIE: What would you have guessed?
Not an armpit, I can tell you that.
[CHUCKLES SOFTLY]
How long you been in New York?
Nine years in June.
No shit?
No shit.
One more year and I’ll be official.
What you do for work?
I’m a programmer.
Computers?
Computers.
No shit?
No shit.
Like ones and zeroes and that shit?
Like ones and zeroes and that shit.
CLARK: Huh.
You thought I’d say something more girly, didn’t you?
Yeah.
[CHUCKLING SOFTLY] Yeah.
Yeah, I thought, you know, wedding planner.
Or fashion or something.
Fashion, hmm.
Not as many women code, I’ll give you that.
Yeah, you drew a line in the sand, lifted your leg and left your mark.
I don’t mind squatting.
[CHUCKLES SOFTLY]
So what’s the deal with the ones and zeroes?
[CHUCKLES SOFTLY] Like?
They’re like building blocks and whatnot.
Like when I look at my computer, I’m really looking at a bunch of ones and zeroes and shit.
Yeah, something like that.
Well, tell me. I mean, I, honest to God, want to know.
Can’t be a know-it-all if I don’t know nothing.
Mmm. [CHUCKLES SOFTLY]
[CLEARS THROAT] Okay.
Basically…
[BOTTLE CAP CLASPS]
[KEYS RATTLE]
…so a computer uses electricity to create on and off states that can represent ones and zeroes.
One being on and zero being off.
But they more often represent the idea of something being true or false.
CLARK: Ones and zeroes mean true or false?
GIRLIE: Well, not always.
They can also represent numbers and other things.
But much of what I do is testing whether something is true or false, and I’ve always used one to mean true and…
Zero to mean false.
You got it.
Oh.
Everything in a computer, the colors, images, music, money, three-dimensional worlds, all of it is…
Is represented by ones and zeroes.
CLARK: True and false.
GIRLIE: Correct.
It’s basically how everything you see operates.
Hmm.
I mean, it makes sense.
We all do that.
Lay down our bricks of ones and zeroes, and build ourselves a fort.
And that shit, it starts young, right?
“You are stupid, true or false?”
[CHUCKLES SOFTLY]
“You are ugly, true or false?”
“Your mother loves you, true or false?”
And when you grow up, that shit don’t stop.
I mean, “Climate change, true or false?”
“Jesus Christ, true or false?”
[CHUCKLES]
“You must wear pants today, true or false?”
And so it goes, on and on.
We all gotta choose our ones and zeroes in whatever we decide, yeah?
That becomes the foundation from which we operate.
Or maybe I’m just talking bullshit.
Zero.
CLARK: Hmmm.
You’re a…
You’re a surprising person,
I must say.
Aw, shucks.
CLARK: Very little surprises me these days.
What about you?
What about me what?
Where are you from?
Hell’s Kitchen.
Or what used to be Hell’s Kitchen, not too far from where we’re going.
What was it like when you were a kid?
CLARK: Well, back in my day, man, if hell really did have a kitchen, that would’ve been it.
You know, you had junkies on every stoop, hookers on every corner.
“Want a date? Want a date?”
[CHUCKLES SOFTLY]
It was fantastic.
You still live in Manhattan?
I own a place, Jackson Heights.
It’s a small house.
Still a house.
You better fuckin’ believe it.
[CHUCKLES]
So, Clark lives in Queens?
No, no, no, no, no, no.
Vinny lives in Queens.
Clark, well, he’s got a loft in Tribeca.
[CHUCKLES]
Right.
[CARS HONKING]
[INDICATORS BEEPING]
[JACKHAMMER RATTLING]
Oh, fuck. That ain’t good.
Damn it.
Some kind of fender bender up there.
[SIRENS BLARING]
Sorry, sweetie, I hate this shit.
GIRLIE: Not your fault.
Huh. Fuckin’ know these roads like the back of my hand, but still can’t predict the weather.
It’s the one thing those fuckin’ apps have on me.
That’s the one fuckin’ thing.
It’s fine, really.
No, it’s not fine.
It’s not professional,
I should’ve been paying attention,
I could’ve gotten off back there.
Well…
[SIGHS SOFTLY]
I’m on the flat rate.
Oh…
So…
[BOTH CHUCKLE]
Nah, I’m gonna meter your ass.
Nope. No, man.
I won. I won again.
You’re leaving me in the dust over here.
Two to zero.
[VEHICLE BEEPING]
[SIREN BLARING]
[MELANCHOLY MUSIC PLAYING]
[FINGERS TAPPING]
[SIGHING RUEFULLY]
[SOFT THUMPS]
[MUSIC INTENSIFIES]
[SIREN BLARING]
[PHONE CHIMING]
[SIGHS]
[MELANCHOLY MUSIC CONTINUES PLAYING]
[SIGHING]
[TYPING]
How long were you in Oklahoma?
Um…
Two weeks.
You’re visiting family?
I have a half-sister.
[PHONE CHIMES]
[PHONE RINGING]
[GASPS SOFTLY]
What’s she like? Your sister?
She’s, um…
Honestly, she’s kind of a bitch.
[CHUCKLES] How’s she a bitch? What’d she do?
You know, little things like…
She makes fun of my cankles.
Your cankles?
I have thick ankles.
Nah, I don’t believe that.
[SIREN BLARING]
It’s true.
You’re small.
I’m small, and I have thick ankles.
That’s a thing?
[CHUCKLES SOFTLY] It’s a thing.
Sounds cute.
Thank you.
It is cute.
[CHUCKLES SOFTLY]
I take it you and the bitch don’t visit very often.
I hadn’t seen her in years.
Huh. Why?
We just stopped talking.
We didn’t get in a fight or anything, we just… stopped talking.
Why now?
She tracked me down and asked me to visit, and I, you know, I didn’t have a reason to say no.
We had a nice time.
I mean, she’s a total fuckin’ bitch, but we laughed a lot, and…
[SIGHS SOFTLY]
We just drank a lot and laughed a lot.
Hmm.
She married?
She has a girlfriend.
Nice.
[BOTH CHUCKLE]
Her name is Eagle.
Fuck me, is that Native American or something?
That’s right.
Well, that’s some cool-ass shit right there.
Hmm.
[CHUCKLES SOFTLY]
Yeah. They seem happy.
They live in a trailer, and they just got a parakeet.
Saving up to do some traveling next year. She’s…
[CHUCKLES SOFTLY]
She’s come a long way.
Is she older or younger?
She was 11 when I was born, so…
She was kind of like a mom growing up.
Hmmm.
But she was a fucked-up mom. Like, fucked-up.
She used to tie me up ankle to ankle, wrist to wrist, and put me in the bathtub, and lock me in the bathroom.
What?
[HESITATES]
Bathtub full?
Empty.
Why the fuck would she do that?
It was her way of helping me practice.
Practice what?
If I ever got kidnapped, I’d be able to escape.
That was her logic.
Did you like getting tied up?
I liked the challenge of getting free.
You got loose, didn’t you?
You sat there in that cold tub, that cold, empty tub, and you wiggled yourself loose every fuckin’ time.
Kidnappers be damned.
[CHUCKLES SOFTLY]
Like I said, you can handle yourself.
[CHUCKLES SOFTLY]
Did you get a prize for getting loose?
Not really.
By the time I’d get free, she’d be at work or whatever.
And where was Mom?
Mom was gone.
Where’d she go?
[SIGHS WEARILY]
Mom went out for a pack of smokes and never came back.
[CHUCKLES]
That’s funny.
You’re funny.
[CHUCKLES]
What are you? 25, 26?
Oh, no, no, no. I don’t answer that question.
Why the hell not?
Because it’s bullshit.
Well, what, are you weird about your age or something?
The whole world is fuckin’ weird about my age.
If I told you that I was 24 or 34, your opinion of me would drastically change.
That’s not true.
For women, it is true.
It is fuckin’ true. [SCOFFS]
The moment we hit 30, our value is cut in half.
I mean, fine. Fuck it, it’s true.
It’s fuckin’ true.
It’s fuckin’ true.
But listen, you really do look 20-something, but by the way you talk, all smart and shit, you know, if I wasn’t looking, I would guess you were 50, so.
So, why does it matter how many times I’ve been around the sun?
Hell if I know.
I guess it’s just my way of trying to understand.
Understand what?
Well, it is a bit confusing to meet some chick who looks 22, but is clearly such a fuckin’ rocket ship.
A rocket ship?
[MIMICKING BLAST-OFF]
That’s you.
Yeah, that is me.
Yeah. Feel it, own it.
Oh, I feel it.
[CHUCKLES]
Gonna take over the whole wide world, no question.
I’ll build a small empire and leave the rest.
Yeah.
You… You plan to share that empire with someone?
A boyfriend, a girlfriend or whatnot?
Mmm…
What? You need me to kick someone’s ass?
[CHUCKLES SOFTLY] No, it’s okay.
What’s their name?
His name doesn’t matter.
He fuck up that bad?
[CHUCKLES]
Come on. I told you my name, tell me his.
I’d rather not say.
Oh, I see. I get it.
You get what?
I get it, he’s married.
Why do you think he’s married?
You could’ve said his name, I would’ve never known.
I mean, there’s not only one Bob or Sam or Jeff in New York fuckin’ City, no.
You’re afraid to say his name because the guy’s married, or you’re married, or someone’s fuckin’ married and no one wants to say that shit out loud.
[CHUCKLES]
Gum?
Yes, please.
Thank you.
You’re welcome.
He’s married.
I know he’s married!
I know people.
You don’t drive a cab 20 years and not know people.
Word of advice, and this is coming from a man married twice, a lot of action on the side.
You ready?
Mmm.
Don’t ever say the word “love,” all right? Just don’t say it.
[SIGHS] Oh, sweetheart…
[CHUCKLES SOFTLY]
…you fuckin’ said it, didn’t you?
You did, you said the fuckin’ L word.
God, honey!
That’s fuckin’ suicide in that world.
Didn’t you know that?
He does not want to hear that from you.
He wants to hear it from his mother, his wife, his kids, but he does not want to hear that shit from you.
In the cognitive wheel that is his life, that is not your function.
[CHUCKLES]
What is my function?
Sex.
Sex. Touch me, lick me, suck me, but do not love me. Don’t you fuckin’ love me.
No, no, no, no, no, no. That is not… [CHUCKLES]
I’m not that…
I’m not that girl. Okay? I…
I just couldn’t not say it anymore.
Oh. [CHUCKLES]
Yeah, and what’s he supposed to do? Love you back?
He’s supposed to ride in on a big white horse and whisk you away to some cliff in Greece?
Live out his days braiding your hair with wild flowers and forget-me-nots? No fuckin’ way.
He’s not gonna be there when your olive oil dries up, sweetheart.
You… You’re not that important.
He knows that, I know that.
[SCOFFS]
You… You just gotta catch up. It’s all right.
Gotta change your ones to zeroes, sweetie.
I get it, it takes time.
Honest to God, my first wife was everything you’d ever want.
5’8″, 115 pounds, tits out to here, hair full of bleach and a head full of nothing.
Men love women that are dumb as shit.
They’re fuckin’ pigs in the bedroom.
Motherfuckin’ pigs in the bedroom, and we love that shit.
You think smart women can’t…
Cannot reduce themselves to pigs in the bedroom?
That’s right. Can’t have it both ways, doesn’t exist.
That’s not true.
You’re a smart girl.
Went to college, read a lot, talk politics, all that shit?
Yes.
You ever been a pig in the bedroom?
What is your definition of a pig?
See, dumb chicks can’t… They don’t need explaining, they just do it.
That was my first wife.
Everything a guy could ask for.
Then she started gaining weight and it made her feel bad about herself, and she stops wanting to, you know.
Oink?
Do her wifely duty or whatnot.
Oh, yes, wifely duty.
And then, no time flat, honest to God,
I find myself a 19-year-old, put her up in an apartment,
paid for the whole damn thing.
Are you fuckin’ kidding me?
Oh, yeah. Cute little thing.
Polish, long legs, fucked the shit out of her.
It was the best year of my life.
I would’ve kept her around longer, but…
Ah…
The L word.
Not your function.
You are there because their wives had kids and got fat
or their wives have a career or cancer or whatever the fuck.
But men don’t want to hear that shit coming out of your mouth.
They barely want to hear you say a word at all.
Then why get married? Why don’t men just stay single
so they can fuck whoever, whenever, wherever?
Whomever.
I’m sorry. Seriously?
[CHUCKLES SOFTLY]
Men,
we wanna look good for other men,
if that makes sense.
We want to have a fancy suit, big house, fast car.
He who dies with the most toys wins, yeah.
I was talking about the suit, the car, the house,
but it also includes the wife and the kids.
Toys.
Now, a lot of guys out there, maybe they did fall in love,
maybe they did really wanna get married and have kids,
and whatever the fuck. But deep down,
really being honest,
looking like a family man’s more important than being one.
[POLICE TALKING INDISTINCTLY OVER RADIO]
[SIGHS WEARILY]
There are good men out there.
Yeah, but they are very few and very far…
More than you’d ever want to know.
Women cheat too.
Different reasons.
Women want to feel sexy.
They want to feel sexy
because they want to feel wanted,
and they want to feel wanted
’cause they want to feel loved. And there it is.
The L word again.
[CHUCKLING] This is such fuckin’ bullshit.
I’m certain there are plenty of women out there
who can cheat just like a fuckin’ man.
Sure. Sure, there are women out there
that just want to get fucked, no question.
But those women, they don’t fuck any Joe Blow down the street.
Nah, they reserve their skills for men that have money.
Men who have power,
thus causing the whole world of men
to want money and power all the more.
The suit, the house, the car, we want those things.
We want those things
because we want those skilled women
to fuck us senseless like a man, no strings attached.
Therefore, you ladies,
fighting so hard to be our equal,
is actually, in essence,
still reducing most of you to nothing but toys.
So, the cycle continues.
I seriously fuckin’ hate you right now.
[CHUCKLES SOFTLY]
This is everything that’s wrong with the world.
Look, at the end of the day,
I do agree with you.
Man or woman, people are people.
Thank you.
And people get lonely.
Don’t matter the reason.
Humans just want a soft spot
to rest their heads for an hour even,
just a fuckin’ hour to get outside of yourself.
But in your case, in your particular case…
[SCOFFS]
In my case, what?
You mean it.
You don’t use the L word unless you mean it, do you?
Look, I know you’re not that girl, all right?
I can tell.
It’s not about having babies for you,
it’s not about bullshit.
It’s about being distracted
just long enough
that you can forget about whatever the fuck happened
in Gage, Oklahoma, all those years ago.
Then, one day, for whatever reason,
this guy grabs your attention.
Suddenly, you want things you never fuckin’ wanted before.
Am I right?
[SCOFFS] No.
[CHUCKLES SOFTLY] Good news is, for you,
you’ll know right away when it happens next time
’cause you’ll know what the fuck is going on.
You won’t be caught with your panties down
on the next round, sweetie.
Unless you want to be.
Please just don’t use the word “panties,”
say like literally anything else.
Pantaloons, underwears!
Great.
Regardless, it will happen again.
Yeah, you’ll meet someone. You’ll meet someone.
It doesn’t matter where.
And the conversation
will start to go in a certain way,
men know how to do that,
steer the talk to see if there’s interest.
When you met your fella, he was doing the same thing.
He was poking around to see if you had any candy to give.
And there you were, thinking how great this guy is,
and how nice he’s listening,
and, aw, such a warm, perfect smile,
the warmth behind the eyes. Bullshit!
Bull-fuckin’-shit, sweetheart. It wasn’t no accident.
He’s done it before and he’ll do it again.
Ain’t nothing special about it.
[SIGHS SOFTLY]
And now…
I gotta piss like a fuckin’ racehorse.
[UNZIPPING]
GIRLIE: Whoa! No.
Do not do that in here.
What am I supposed to do?
Take it outside, man.
And get arrested?
Who the fuck’s gonna arrest you? Come on, Hell’s Kitchen.
Like you’ve never peed outside before.
Fuck.
[DOOR OPENS]
[CHUCKLES]
[CAR HORN BLARING]
MAN: Where the fuck do you think you’re going?
[ENGINE REVVING]
[CARS HONKING]
[SURREAL MUSIC PLAYING]
[SURREAL MUSIC CONTINUES PLAYING]
[FOOTSTEPS APPROACHING]
[DOOR OPENS]
[DOOR CLOSES]
[SIGHS SOFTLY]
He gave me his card.
What?
He… He gave me his card.
He didn’t ask for my number or anything.
CLARK: Yeah, yeah. There you go.
No, but that’s my point.
He gave me his card and I emailed him,
not the other way around.
Yeah, he’s good.
I bet that man gives out a shit ton of cards wherever he goes.
I mean, it’s… It’s a numbers game.
You know, sometimes he gets the candy,
sometimes he doesn’t, but you better believe
he’s dishing out those cards like it’s fuckin’ ice cream.
And when you contacted him, sweetie…
[EXHALES]
…you gave away your first piece of candy.
You can’t blame the guy for wanting more.
You think about it.
His card,
it had a business email on it, right?
How long did it take him
to switch you over to something a little more private?
Blink of a fuckin’ eye, am I right?
He wasn’t looking for love, sweetheart.
He wasn’t looking to replace his wife.
Who the hell wants to go to all that trouble?
No.
He’s all set up just the way he wants to be.
He was just looking for another toy to play with,
and clearly, he found one.
For all your smarts, and all the time and effort
and everything you’ve clearly done
to make yourself a fuckin’ fortress,
somehow you’ve found yourself back in that bathtub again.
Your hands and legs all tied up,
fighting so hard to get free.
One to two. I’m catching up.
You done yet?
What?
You’ve said very little in a very long time,
that I don’t already know.
So?
So, go fuck yourself.
[CHUCKLES SOFTLY]
[SIGHS]
Listen, I run my mouth sometimes, that’s my problem.
I… I just like to push buttons.
Stuff like this is…
It’s just something people don’t wanna talk about.
Who the fuck wants to talk about this shit?
No one. Look…
Look, you are a wonderful person.
A human.
You ask me about my name and shit,
and you got a good heart. I can see that,
which is why I just gotta tell you, you know,
you’re better off walking away.
I’m not saying that because I think I’m smarter than you.
I’m saying it ’cause…
I used to be that guy, doing what your guy’s doing.
And I’m looking at your face like that, all sad and shit.
[SIGHS]
That’s why I don’t go for the full candy no more.
You know, I take a blowjob on the side
every now and then but…
Some of you girls, you grow a conscience in the morning,
and I just can’t deal with that, I’m too old.
Your guy young or old?
Old.
How old?
Old.
CLARK: Like what? Like daddy type shit?
He could be my father, yeah.
So I’m guessing you don’t have a daddy, right?
I mean I do, but…
No, but you don’t have a daddy,
and you wanted him to be your daddy. Am I right?
[SIGHING]
You ever call him Daddy?
[CHUCKLES]
Two to two.
We’re tied.
We are tied.
Oh, you call him Daddy.
I do.
That’s hot.
It’s fucked up.
There’s nothing fucked up about that.
I don’t know psychology very well,
but I know it don’t take rocket science to figure out
that there’s a little girl inside you.
The one you used to be, she didn’t go anywhere.
And that little girl, she didn’t have a daddy,
but she still needs a fuckin’ daddy, right?
So, you meet this guy
with his bald head and his liver spots,
and whatever the hell he’s got going on.
Would make most girls your age want to puke, but not you.
Because he’s everything you missed out there
back in the day.
He’s all the things your friends had
that you didn’t fuckin’ have.
And the little girl inside,
she just wants her daddy to hold her.
Tell her nice things and tell her bedtime stories.
But the grown woman on the outside?
Well, she wants a different kind of bedtime story,
if you catch my drift.
Put the two together,
and that guy has a chance of having something
he never would’ve touched otherwise.
Me.
You.
He’s a lucky son of a bitch to have gotten your candy,
if you don’t mind my saying.
[CHUCKLES SOFTLY]
He got kids?
He does.
How many?
Three.
Shit. How old?
Young.
His wife young?
No, I think they just waited.
Have you met her?
No.
You seen her?
No.
But you’ve seen pictures.
Come on. This day and age,
you wanna find a picture, you can find a fuckin’ picture.
Why do you care?
CLARK: Huh?
I… I guess, to be honest,
I drive around in this beast all day,
you got time to do nothing but think, you know?
When you think too much, you ask too many questions.
Nothing special about it.
But hey, it… It ain’t all for nothing.
I mean, who else are you gonna talk to about this shit?
Not like you’re ever gonna see me again.
I…
I found one picture of her.
Mmm-hmm.
They’re pretty private.
They both in the picture?
They’re at some…
Some corporate thing, like an award thing.
CLARK: Mmm-hmm.
And what are they doing, in the picture?
They’re just smiling.
They’re sitting next to each other and they’re just…
smiling at the camera.
And?
And they just look normal.
They just look normal.
He win the award?
He did.
Hmmm. What is he, some kind of big shot?
Somebody I’d recognize?
Oh, yeah.
CLARK: Uh-huh.
And how old is she? The wife?
Late 40’s, I’d say.
She’s pretty?
She looks really sweet.
[CHUCKLES SOFTLY]
So she’s not pretty.
[CHUCKLES]
She’s lovely.
She has this huge smile.
Like a really…
Like a really happy smile.
I looked at that picture for a really long time,
and I had this really strange feeling that maybe…
[CHUCKLES SOFTLY]
That she and I could have been friends.
Maybe.
Hmmm.
Another time, another place, maybe.
You ever meet the kids?
God, no.
Seen pictures?
He shows me pictures.
Fuck, like, on his phone?
Yeah. Videos, too.
Fuck. I mean, that’s some trust.
I mean, that’s some fucking trust right there.
[CHUCKLES SOFTLY]
Well.
What?
You did it.
What’d I do?
I don’t know. But you did something.
I mean, he let you in.
That’s as far as anyone in your position could ever go.
What am I supposed to do with that?
Look, it don’t change anything,
but it is a compliment.
Kids cute?
They’re adorable.
Boys, girls?
Twin boys and a girl.
Hmm.
He showed me this video of his daughter dancing.
She’s just three years old,
and she’s wearing this, like, red cape,
like a princess cape or something,
and she’s just twirling and twirling and twirling.
Dancing for her daddy.
That’s sweet.
You ever dance for your daddy?
I mean, your real daddy when you were a kid.
No.
I did have a cape though.
I had a long purple cape,
and it made me think I could fly.
Cape wasn’t lying.
You can fly just fine.
[CHUCKLES SOFTLY]
So, what about the twins? What do they do?
GIRLIE: They seem like good kids.
And you get the feeling you could have been friends,
with the kids, another time, another place.
Yeah, well,
he can pretend to be your daddy,
but he’s gotta be their real daddy, so,
you get why you ain’t going to Greece.
[CARS HONKING]
[CARS STARTING]
Here we go.
[GEAR SHIFTING]
[OFFICERS SPEAKING INDISTINCTLY]
[MELANCHOLY MUSIC PLAYING]
Shit, that ain’t no fender bender.
[MELANCHOLY MUSIC CONTINUES PLAYING]
[PHONE CHIMING INTERMITTENTLY]
[TYPING]
[MELANCHOLY MUSIC CONTINUES PLAYING]
Eleven years.
Big difference.
Your sister being that much older.
Yeah.
She was only 17 when we both left home.
I was six.
CLARK: You run away?
GIRLIE: I went to live with her.
I mean, I can’t imagine
any Oklahoma judge saying that was all right.
[CHUCKLES SOFTLY] No, no.
No one said it was all right, but that’s what happened.
CLARK: You lived in the armpit with your sister?
We moved, actually, to Woodward.
Like 20 minutes away,
into her boyfriend’s house.
CLARK: Boyfriend?
She had boyfriends back then.
CLARK: Huh.
Why did you go to live with your sister?
Did your daddy do something?
Something he shouldn’t have done?
No, it was never like that.
What was it like?
Well, he…
He actually never touched me.
I mean, not one hug? Not one?
Didn’t have to be a hug.
You know, a pat on the back would’ve been nice,
a fuckin’ high five.
But I remember the day we left,
my sister jumped in her car,
and my dad was sitting on the front porch.
And before I left, I turned and I looked at him,
and he looked at me, and…
And he got up, and he walked over to me
and he reached out and…
And he shook my hand.
I had never shaken anyone’s hand before.
I was six.
I was just little, you know? But I knew what it meant.
What did he look like? Your pop?
[INHALES] Oh, he was a cowboy.
CLARK: [CHUCKLES] Never met a cowboy before.
Gotta put that on my list.
You know, before I die.
Number 22, meet a motherfuckin’ cowboy.
What else is on your list?
You know, I’ve already done most of it.
Like what?
Like…
I learned to scuba dive last year.
Took a trip to Nassau, sat on the edge of a boat.
And, you know, they make you fall backward, right?
So, you fall back in the water,
and you start to let the wind out of your sails,
and you go down, down, down.
I mean, I didn’t go too far,
I don’t have the training for that,
crazy stuff like shipwrecks or whatnot.
Saw a blue whale even, yeah.
Big-ass whale passed right by us.
I mean, it was just swimming along like it was nothing.
Fuckin’ poetry, that shit.
Wow.
Yeah. Big fuckin’ wow.
But I don’t know if I’ll do it again.
Why not?
It takes a lot of guts to breathe underwater.
That’s the biggest challenge, just telling your…
Allowing your body
to do this thing it wasn’t meant to do, you know?
I wasn’t afraid to see a shark,
I wasn’t afraid to be alone. Mostly just…
[SIGHS]
…afraid of breathing.
I mean, that’s pretty scary shit when you’re afraid to breathe.
I always liked sharks.
Did you see one?
No.
But I always tell everyone I did. You know?
Great white shark, 13 feet long,
two, three tons, just swimming around me, looking for lunch.
Until I look him straight in the eye,
give him the middle finger,
and that shark swims the fuck away
’cause he knows what’s going on.
[CHUCKLES] Oh, wow. That’s your story? [LAUGHS]
Yeah, I fuckin’ love that story.
What’s on your list that you haven’t done?
I do want to go to Japan one day.
Heard a lot about it.
Heard about how they got these…
These vending machines
with used bloomers in ’em.
Bloomers?
Panties!
Oh, come on, man! We’ve been over this.
Well, I tried to call ’em something else,
you didn’t know what the fuck I was talkin’ about.
They got used panties!
GIRLIE: Oh, God, no.
Panties.
Panties in vending machines.
No.
Oh, my God.
That’s what I heard.
I gotta see that shit.
They can’t really be used.
I don’t give a fuck either way,
it’ll be mind over matter on that one.
What about you?
Huh?
What’s on your list?
[INHALES]
I don’t know.
Come on, talk to me.
[CHUCKLES SOFTLY]
Well, I have always wanted to learn how to swing dance.
Yeah?
Yeah.
[CHUCKLES SOFTLY]
Like get tossed around and stuff.
It looks like a lot of fun. I think I’d be good at it.
I bet you would.
And I wanna be one of those
freaky bird-watchers in Central Park,
who just knows everything about all the birds.
Someone who can recognize their calls.
I just wanna be a bird lady.
CLARK: What else?
I have been…
I’ve been thinking about having a little…
Like a little herb garden in my window.
You know, just basil and stuff.
Try to remember to use it when I’m cooking,
which isn’t very often.
[LAUGHS]
But I like the idea of it being there.
CLARK: What else?
I wanna habla español perfectamente.
And I want to go to Oaxaca during Noche de Rábanos,
and I want to eat all the things.
Like the ants, and, you know, the crickets.
And, yes,
I do wanna stand at the edge of a fuckin’ cliff in Greece,
and dive off that motherfucker.
What else?
What do you mean what else? I just told you so much.
What, it’s time for me to ante up?
Yeah, damn straight.
How many chips you got on the table?
Two. We’re tied, remember?
Two to two.
And you raise me one.
And it better be a good one.
I’ll give you a good one, and you’ll match me?
I’m not gonna let you win, that’s for damn sure.
All right, all right. I can hang.
[CHUCKLES SOFTLY]
And it’s gotta be something personal, okay?
Not one of, like, your little anecdotes.
Well, fuck, I don’t know.
Um… Hmm.
Like…
How’d you meet your wife?
Which one?
The first one.
She threw up in my cab.
Classy.
Yeah, she was clubbing.
[GIGGLES]
You know, she was, like, with her girlfriends,
ladies’ night or some shit.
And they were all in these tight dresses and high heels,
and they smelled like booze and sweat,
and flowers.
[CHUCKLES]
And I was in heaven.
All these pretty ladies jammed in my cab,
sitting on each other’s laps, talking so loud,
laughing, screaming out the window.
And I gotta tell you, I gotta be honest.
My cock was so fuckin’ hard,
it was just pounding in my panties
because…
Oh, my God.
God, the odds were, I was gonna get lucky that night.
If I didn’t get lucky, at least I’d get enough good material
to rub one out at the end of the night. You know what I mean?
Mmm.
[CHUCKLES]
And then outta nowhere,
Blondie doubles over in the back,
empties her stomach.
Which wasn’t holding that much, I’m thankful to report.
And what happened?
There’s not much you can do, you know?
Drop ’em off and get back to the garage,
hose down the cab.
And there it was, right there.
Her purse.
GIRLIE: Hmm.
So, next day she calls the company,
and me being the gentleman that I am,
I offer to bring it out there myself.
And I didn’t have to jerk off after paying her a visit,
I can tell you that.
[BOTH CHUCKLE]
Yeah.
[SMACKS LIPS]
Why did you marry her?
[SMACKS LIPS]
She was a doll.
Dumb as shit. But still, she was…
She was a sweetheart.
I used to play pranks on her, you know?
Hide behind the couch, then jump out.
Or… Or, you know, putting sugar in the salt shaker,
just dumb shit like that.
And she always laughed about it, you know?
She’d choose to laugh about it.
Like, when something happens,
and you got a choice,
that choice to get pissed off
or to laugh it off,
she’d laugh.
She’d choose to laugh every time.
Did she ever get you?
What? A prank?
Mmm-hmm.
[CHUCKLES SOFTLY]
She did one time.
She poured cold water all over me
when I was in the shower.
Like a bucket of ice water, Niagara Falls.
[CHUCKLES SOFTLY]
And I had that same choice, you know?
Either to get pissed or to laugh it off.
And what did you choose?
I laughed my fuckin’ ass off.
[CHUCKLES SOFTLY]
Chased her around the house in my birthday suit,
she’s screaming like a little girl and everything,
like we were playing tag and shit.
Finally caught her in the kitchen.
That was a good day.
I bet she’s a lot smarter than you give her credit for.
Do you miss her?
I do sometimes. Yeah.
She was like a summer day, you know?
Not too complicated, just, you know,
beer and a bag of chips, and we were set.
[CHUCKLES SOFTLY]
Three to two. You gonna match me or what?
[CHUCKLES SOFTLY]
I mean, that last one’s a tough act to follow.
Yeah, you surprised me there.
I surprised myself,
I don’t talk about my shit.
You think I talk about my shit?
Well, there you go. That’s what’s on the table.
Let’s talk about the shit, let’s talk about all the shit.
Okay. All right.
All right.
All right.
All right.
I’ll think of something juicy.
Easy.
Make it about your daddy.
Which one?
You pick.
Fuck.
Come on.
There’s gotta be at least one more thing you haven’t told me.
Something you’re just dying to say out loud.
Take your time.
Not like I’m going nowhere.
[SURREAL MUSIC PLAYING]
[SURREAL MUSIC CONTINUES PLAYING]
[SIGHS]
[SOMBER MUSIC PLAYING]
[SIGHS SOFTLY]
[SIGHS SOFTLY]
[ENTHRALLING MUSIC PLAYING]
Got a few more minutes if you still wanna play for the win.
What’s left?
What have you not told me about?
Last night, my sister and I, we…
We got drunk.
We got really drunk,
and we were sitting outside her trailer.
And she has these little…
Um…
These little chili pepper lights, like…
Christmas lights or something, you know?
Just draped around,
and we sat in these old beach chairs,
and just drank and drank.
What about Eagle?
Eagle was around,
she was grilling up some burgers.
CLARK: You talk about the bathtub?
We did. I brought it up, and she just laughed.
She laughed so hard she cried.
She didn’t apologize or anything, it was amazing.
CLARK: What else did you talk about?
We talked about just everything,
like the perms our mom used to give us,
sitting on a stool in the… In the kitchen
with this, like, old pink towel draped over our shoulders,
and you know, that smell, that horrible perm smell
that just sticks around for days.
And we start talking about that day,
the day she took me away.
And I told my side of the story, and then…
And then she told her side.
CLARK: What did she tell you?
She said that our dad was on the porch that day.
And…
That we passed him as we walked to the car.
And then she said that she got in the car,
and then I got in the car,
and we just drove away.
She said, “He didn’t shake your hand that day.”
But when I think back on it, it doesn’t make any sense.
Because I remember it so clearly.
Even I remember the feel of his hand.
I remember thinking it felt like sandpaper.
So, which of you is right?
You or your sister?
GIRLIE: I don’t know.
But…
[SIGHS WEARILY]
If that memory isn’t real,
the moment my father finally touched me,
then I don’t know what is, man.
[CHUCKLES SOFTLY]
Ones and zeroes.
Yeah, ones and zeroes.
I got a story kinda like that.
About my pop.
That moment where
everything comes into focus.
And then…
goes out again.
But that’s a story for another cab ride.
We’re tied again.
Three to three.
Three to three.
Nice.
[SIGHS WEARILY]
We did a rain dance last night.
The three of us, just drunk.
But Eagle, Eagle showed us how.
Mmm-hmm.
Did it rain?
Well, that’s the thing.
Two weeks ago, when I flew to Oklahoma…
I was pregnant.
What’d your daddy have to say about that?
I never told him.
I never…
I never told anyone.
Did you get rid of the baby?
It got rid of me.
The first day in Oklahoma, I started bleeding,
and my sister didn’t know.
I… I just told her I was having a bad period,
like a really bad period, like…
She let me sleep a lot,
and gave me a heating pad and some ice cream, and…
[SNIFFLES]
But then, after seven days,
when I kept bleeding,
I had to hide the tampons… [CHUCKLES SOFTLY]
…and pretend it was just a…
a normal period, that it ended.
I had to get up and go out and meet her friends, and…
Just feeling like…
Like trash.
I wasn’t gonna keep it.
I had made up my mind, I wasn’t gonna keep it,
and I wasn’t gonna tell anyone.
But then…
[SNIFFLES]
But then when it happened…
When it just…
It just happened on its own,
I was…
[SOBBING]
I was so…
relieved.
[SOBBING]
I had never been more relieved in my whole life.
And then last night…
[SIGHS WEARILY, SNIFFLES]
…when we were dancing,
in my mind,
I really did, I just begged the sky to rain down on me.
To just clean me.
[SNIFFLES]
To wash it all away.
The whole fucking thing.
I asked the sky to just… [SNIFFLES]
…take it from me.
[CHUCKLES SOFTLY]
And then this morning, I woke up…
[SIGHS]
…and I wasn’t bleeding anymore.
It had stopped after two weeks.
Rain dance worked.
[SIGHS SOFTLY]
[CHUCKLES SOFTLY]
[SNIFFLES]
Four to three.
Shit. I fold. [CHUCKLES]
I win?
Can’t beat that, that’s for sure.
Fuck.
God damn.
[SIGHS SOFTLY]
[SIGHS SOFTLY]
[DRAMATIC MUSIC PLAYING]
[BRAKES SCREECH]
[ENGINE STOPS]
[CHUCKLES]
I don’t have any cash.
I’m sorry.
No one ever does.
I’m sorry. I’m gonna leave you a big tip though.
Yeah, my advice don’t come for free.
You gonna need a receipt?
No, I’m good.
[MACHINE TRILLING]
[CLARK SIGHS]
[DOOR OPENS]
[DOOR CLOSES]
So…
[CHUCKLES SOFTLY]
So…
You gonna be all right?
[SIGHS] I don’t know.
Your brain,
it’s a little confused right now.
It’s in panic ’cause…
you ain’t used to breathing underwater,
and it’s telling you you’re in way over your head.
“This is it, no way out. Done, end of story.”
You just keep breathing.
No matter how far down you go,
you keep breathing.
You’re gonna be all right.
Someone like you…
You are not a shipwreck.
You’re gonna swim back up.
Swim back up to all that light and life and colors
you are.
You might even see a blue whale.
I hope so.
[SIGHS]
[SOFT PIANO MUSIC PLAYING]
Thank you.
You’re most welcome. [CHUCKLES SOFTLY]
[SIGHS]
You have a good night.
You, too.
[LUGGAGE CLUNKS]
[SIGHS SOFTLY]
[KEYS JANGLING]
Mikey.
What?
I just always felt more like a Mikey,
not like a Vinny, not a Clark.
If it were up to me,
I’d choose Mikey.
[LAUGHS]
[SOFT PIANO MUSIC CONTINUES]
Good night, Mikey.
[KEYS JANGLING]
[DOOR OPENS]
[MELANCHOLY MUSIC PLAYING]
[SOFT PIANO MUSIC PLAYING]
