Fresh off a trip abroad, Sammy Obeid hits the mic the day America wakes up to a headline built for memes and meltdowns: Charlie Kirk has been shot. What follows is a rapid-fire, no-safe-words set about gun culture, freedom of speech colliding with the Second Amendment, and a nation that turns everything into team sports. He roasts conspiracies, skewers both camps, and mines the surreal ironies of a school event turning into a crime scene—while reminding you jokes are for the living. Smart, sharp, uncomfortable, very funny. Roll the transcript and brace for equal-opportunity offense. Premiered on September 16, 2025 (YouTube)
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Sammy Obeid: Who Took Charlie Kirk? | Full transcript
Honolulu, September 13, 2025
Conservative activist Charlie Charlie Charlie Charlie Kirk gunned down.
They just found the perpetrator. They’ll get to the bottom of this.
If you read this, you are gay.
Just flew back to America and boy, my right to bear arms is tired. America is a very unique place. You don’t realize it until you leave. I was just in Asia for three weeks, and in a lot of places there they don’t tip at all. It’s actually kind of cool. It’s another thing you don’t have to think about. But here you tip. It’s a thing. And I feel like we don’t always tip because we want to give somebody more. It’s just because we feel like they’ll hate us if we don’t. And we tip because we know somebody’s not paying them enough, so we’re kind of picking up the slack.
To be honest, in some neighborhoods I tip so that I don’t get shot. I call those hollow tips. That’s a unique thing about America: America is a gun culture. You don’t find this in most places in the world.
In fact, in a lot of places they just don’t have guns. If you talk about guns and shooting, they’re like, “Oh, you’re American.” That’s what comes up. I call it the American tax. We have freedom of speech, we make all the cool music, but you can get shot at any time. It’s the balance of yin and yang—which is their thing, not ours—but we took it. We like taking stuff too.
I want to make this very clear: I don’t celebrate when someone dies. I don’t think that’s the way forward. I don’t think that’s the human thing to do. I do not celebrate the death of another human being. I make jokes, and there’s a difference. Jokes are not a celebration of death; they are a celebration of life while we have it.
And if for a moment you think that I’m selective about this, please check my track record. Sometimes people accuse me: “Oh, you only make jokes when somebody on the right dies.” No. Biden—each time he died, I made a joke. Every single time, never skipped a beat. You might not remember that, and neither does he.
When the Pope died, I was at mass making jokes: “Please forgive me for these.” When my own grandfather died, I was like, “Where’s the will?” I’m not a good person. Am I going to heaven? Probably not. But I am enjoying my life. And I know in my heart of hearts, I do not celebrate death. I just think it’s important to talk about and digest and look at why things happen so we can understand and make this world a better place. Comedy is a good vehicle for that. I honestly don’t think I should even have to explain this as a comedian—yet I do all the time.
So with all that said: Charlie Kirk got assassinated. I’m not going to make any cheap shots. I see him as a human being. I didn’t agree with a lot of things he said, and I was only peripherally aware of him in the last couple years, when he became very popular. I was actually scheduled to debate Charlie Kirk. A lot of people don’t know this. Well, he didn’t know it either—but I got accepted into a community college, and that’s where he would go.
Again, no disrespect. I actually value that he went to college campuses and talked to kids. I found out about this when I was in Korea. Here’s the thing about Asia or Australia, if you’ve ever been: they’re like seven, eight, nine hours behind America—but in tomorrow. It’s a very weird place to be. Here in America, you’re actually eight hours ahead of Asia, but yesterday. So you’re actually not ahead.
You’re actually in the stone ages. But I woke up at 8 a.m. in South—North Korea. Actually, I was in North Korea. Just kidding. Just kidding. Just kidding. Wouldn’t that be a plot twist? I was in South Korea.
It was 8:00 a.m. and my opener, Chai, yelled from the other room: “Charlie Kirk was shot.” And I was like, “Shut up, dude. Too early for jokes.” Then he sent me a photo, and I was like, “Wow, you AI-ed a montage of Twitter headlines.” And then it hit me: this actually did happen.
I thought, “Wow, this is crazy. This is one of the craziest things I’ve ever seen. I know this guy. I’ve seen this guy.” And I started looking into the story. Here’s the thing: you start to understand why the rest of the world sees us as the land of shootings, because they wake up and there are already a billion memes about what happened.
When you hear about someone dying, most people do not naturally have the instinct to make a joke. Even myself, as a joke-maker, my first instinct is not to make a joke. That comes hours later. But I woke up and saw this after America had already processed it for eight hours. I was already seeing all the jokes. I thought, “Wow, these people move fast.” You can understand—I was dropped into this, and it was a lot to process.
I watched the video. There’s a video of him getting shot. And nobody should ever have to see something like this. We as people should not be seeing this level of violence on screen. I can’t even believe that I watched it 20 times. It was too much. Too much for any person. And the fact that we subject ourselves to this is crazy.
If you don’t know the backstory: Charlie Kirk is a political commentator. He associates a lot with Republicans and conservative ideology. He would often go to campuses to speak to students, which again I find very noble. I think that’s actually a very important thing to do—to stimulate dialogue at college campuses.
However, schools are not the safest place to be in America. If you’re looking for a place to not get shot, I wouldn’t go to a school. You rarely hear, “There was a shooting today at Trader Joe’s.” It’s almost always at a school—and sometimes at a Walmart. That’s just how it is, and you have to know the rules.
So he was at a school. What he does is engage in dialogue with the kids. He asked them questions, they talked for some time, and then the question of shootings came up. They talked about a couple other things too—like how many shooters were trans. I guess they were running out of topics. Somebody asked how many shooters are trans, and he answered that. Then somebody asked, “How many shootings have there been in America?” A general question.
And he said, “Counting or not counting gang violence?” And then someone shot him. First of all, the irony: his last words were “violence.” The symbolism here is incredible. He was wearing a shirt that said “freedom.” His last words were “violence.” They were talking about school shootings while at a school—during a shooting. It was like something written on South Park. The levels of irony were insane.
So his last words were “gang violence,” which I don’t think anybody has ever uttered as their last words before. Usually someone shouts a specific gang name: “Norte bang bang,” or “Southside [__] bang bang.” But nobody has ever said, “Gang violence.”
And that’s something to unpack more. This has been a point Charlie Kirk liked to make a lot, and so do many other conservative commentators when discussing shootings: are we counting gang violence or not? I think it’s a valid question, because some sources that count mass shootings do include gang violence and some don’t. Gang violence inflates the numbers a lot.
However, there’s a subtle implication—as if there still aren’t a huge number of regular shootings. And that’s a problem. Also, it’s like—can we care about the gangsters too? Crips lives matter, you know?
Whatever, guys. You don’t really have gangs in Hawaii. I don’t know. Are you like, “No, we have that too”? Well, you guys have everything—in very small doses.
So he shouts “gang violence,” and then someone shoots him. Instantly, as soon as Charlie Kirk got shot, the whole world tried to politicize it. That’s America’s thing. America loves to politicize everything. We politicize jeans commercials. Was she selling blue jeans or white jeans? We politicize Cracker Barrel logos. Anything you give us, we’ll be like: is that woke or anti-woke? Is that the far left or the far right? Why do we have to politicize everything?
And that’s the sad part. So many Americans—maybe not in Hawaii—fall into this trap. As soon as Charlie Kirk was shot, people on the right were like, “Well, clearly it was a leftist. Clearly it was a liberal.” It’s like—first of all, you should know they don’t have great aim. You should know this by now. Liberals are not often at the shooting range working on their marksmanship. Or their marks-they-ship. Sorry.
Thank you, thank you. That joke did not work in Asia for some reason. I was waiting for it to work so much. So thank you, guys. So nice to be home. Please don’t shoot. I’m also just thankful comedy is indoors, to be honest. Don’t get scared. We’re good. We’re fine. Everybody relax.
But yeah, everybody politicizes. Just as well, you had people on the left like, “Yeah, got him. That’s what he deserved for saying all those things he said.” And it’s like—no. That’s equally falling into the same trap. Why do we have to politicize everything? Because politicizing, when it comes to left and right, is ultimately a gang mentality.
What are the biggest gangs in America other than Republican versus Democrat? Right? So what I’m saying is the shooting technically did count as gang violence. You made it that way. I did not. That was not my choice.
Now, a lot of people are saying: “Oh, are we going to go into a civil war? Is America going to go into a civil war?” First of all, we’re not civil enough for that. We can’t even nail the civil part. Maybe we’ll get to war eventually. But no, I don’t think this is a civil war.
Charlie Kirk was beloved, but he was also hated by so many people. That’s not enough unanimity. We’re not the United States. We’re states. Be honest about what we are. I don’t think we can even agree on who we want to fight over.
Also, if we had a civil war in today’s world, the main fighting class would have to be Gen Z. I just don’t see that happening. It would be like, “Bang bang, you’re dead ass. No cap.”
Thanks, guys.
I will say though, it is kind of nice to see Republicans finally caring about a school shooting. I will say that.
And people ask me, “Well, how did you feel about Charlie Kirk? You heard all the things he said.” It’s like—Charlie Kirk was younger than me. He could have been my younger brother. He was younger than me and a lot more successful. So of course I hated him. Of course I hated him. That doesn’t mean… You should already know that I’m against violence. Have you not seen my other material? People get outraged when I make jokes about a shooting. Like—have you not seen my genocide material?
I saw this news in Korea, and in Korea it was already 9/11. For you guys, this happened on 9/10. But for me, it was 9/11. And I know you don’t relate, because for you it was 9/10. But you know—on 9/10 it’s 9/11 somewhere.
So the messed-up thing is I knew this was an important event that had to be talked about. I instantly put together a set and did it that night, on 9/11, in Tokyo. We recorded it and I posted it on this app. It was taken down within 24 hours—actually within 16 hours—for bullying. Which is a bit ironic considering this particular story.
But here’s the thing: I know the community guidelines. I read them before bed every night. And unlike America, my takes are very civil. My whole thing was just like: hey, let’s look at this from a bigger perspective, and let’s not preach violence.
Meanwhile, if you’ve been on the internet, there are some wild takes out there. From both left and right—just really violent stuff. And it’s like, you’re taking my video down? Preaching togetherness? Dude, people are saying really insensitive jokes. And imagine how many Halloween costumes there are going to be this year. It’s going to be a lot.
I’m just saying I’m not the bad guy. I think it’s important to see every human as a human. It’s also fair to evaluate what somebody has said in their life. If you want to honor somebody and only look at the good things on the day of their funeral, that’s your right. But we should also be honest about what somebody said; otherwise we’ll never learn anything.
The truth is Charlie Kirk said a lot of inflammatory things about many people. If you look at some of the harshest things he said, a lot of it was about Islam. He said things about Black people. I’m not Black, so I can’t speak for how Black people feel about what he said, but as someone from a mostly Muslim family, hearing him say things like “Islam is the seed of evil,” basically saying Islam is ruining America and needs to be stopped—that’s rough. Occasionally he’d say, “There’s a few good Muslims,” like, “Am I one of the good ones? Did I make the cut?” If you saw some of his tweets about Islam, your first thought might be, “Oh, a Muslim probably did this.” Not saying you would have been right, but I understand why someone might think that.
I truly believe in freedom of speech. I respect that Charlie Kirk believed in it and was literally willing to die for it. But we learned that freedom of speech only goes so far. The government gives you only so much freedom of speech, and you only have so much freedom to say things before it catches up to you. That’s a truth we need to acknowledge because we live in a country with the Second Amendment. I’m not arguing here whether we should take it away or keep it. As long as we have the Second Amendment, remember we put the First Amendment first for a reason—but the Second is second for a reason, because sometimes the second catches up to the first. Sometimes you should plead the Fifth and shut the hell up. That’s my philosophy. I’m not against guns, per se—I think the concept of a gun as a killing machine was a mistake. But as long as we have guns, either everybody should have them or nobody should. We shouldn’t be arbitrarily picking and choosing who gets them—maybe with some specific restrictions.
Here’s how I feel about gun control: every time there’s a massive act of gun violence, our country divides. Half the country says, “Get rid of all the guns.” The other half says, “We need more guns,” and that’s it—guns with little guns that battle it out. We’ll never know which theory works until we try both. That’s how science works: control and variable. The United States is perfect for that because we’re not united—we’re states. We have 50 states—51 if you count Israel—and a lot of room to experiment.
I think we should pick a state to try the no-guns thing and a state to try the all-guns thing. I’m not the governor of Hawaii, but Hawaii seems like a good place to try no guns—if you want to kill someone in Hawaii, you probably just need therapy: go to the beach, sip a coconut, you’ll be fine. For the all-guns experiment, I volunteer Alaska. Alaska already has a high rate of gun violence because it’s mostly bears—bear-on-bear violence. Alaska has a bunch of problems already; it also has a high rate of nonconsensual sex. Disgusting. You’d think the opposite would be true given the state’s name, but it’s not. So send more guns to Alaska. Arm the bears. Give the bears the right to bear arms and see what happens.
We’re at the point now where we have so many shootings that we have shooters of every different kind of identity. The topic that came up right before Charlie Kirk died was how many trans shooters there have been in America. Why are we even asking that question? The fact that trans people are such a small demographic and that we already have trans shooters actually says a lot. It’s very progressive. I support trans shooter rights. My take is unpopular because I’m not anti-gun and I’m pro-trans—those two don’t often go together. For the sake of argument, I’m pro-gun and pro-trans, and only Arizona agrees with that. So much so that I bought a transgender gun. Yeah, it’s a sought-off shotgun. I ran that joke by my trans friend; they loved it. They’re also a comedian, so maybe not the best barometer.
Then you had a lot of people reacting with, “I didn’t like the guy, but now I’m scared.” Dude, you should have been scared before all this. There have been school shootings this whole time. They’re all important and need to be stopped. Rest in peace, Charlie Kirk. But just because it was an adult this time doesn’t mean we suddenly care—America doesn’t give a shit about kids, man. It also bothers me that after this happens, all politicians, left and right, have the same sound bite: “There is no place for political violence in this country.” There is no place for any violence, bro. Schools are getting shot up; you’re voting to send money to bomb kids overseas. Stop doing that too.
If you’re a politician and you’re worried violence is coming to your doorstep, maybe stop exporting it all over the world with your policies. If you don’t get why what goes around comes around, then maybe get educated. Do some research.
Now on to solving this crime. I’m a private detective. There were a lot of suspicious things. The shot was made at long range, which sparked debate. The first talking point was: a long-range shot like that has to be a professional job. Then hunters came out of the woodwork saying they do that all the time. I don’t know who to believe at this point. What’s crazy is a couple things: right after they shot Charlie, they immediately zoned in on an old guy who became the fall guy. He apparently said, “Yeah, I did it.” You look over and it’s this old guy—like, is that the guy? He said, “It was me.” After three hours of focusing on him, they admitted, “No, it’s actually not that guy at all.” That left time for the shooter to get away.
My first thought was the shooter shot at the exact same time the subject of shootings came up—was the person who asked the question in on it? That felt very coordinated. But then the student who asked the question posted that he was the one who asked it and said he felt bad—he saw it right in front of him. As a detective, he checks out. I don’t think he was in on it; he was a student in the wrong place at the wrong time. But the irony stands: did the shooter wait until that came up just to be extra ironic? If so, they heard it from 200 yards away, so credit to the sound system. It could also have been a total coincidence, which is even bonkers.
Everybody immediately assumed this had to be done with experience and planning. Every group of people sat behind their laptops thinking, “Please don’t let it be ours. Please don’t let it be ours.” I know Charlie Kirk said vicious things about Muslims, but please don’t make this a halal shooter. We were all behind screens: “Please, please, please don’t let it be us.” Then everyone could relax: it was a white guy. “Oh my god, thank you so much.” His name is Tyler—that’s a white name. As soon as they said “Tyler,” I was like, “All right, we’re good.” I didn’t even need to see him.
You know, I get it — a Black person can be Tyler, too. But it’s not Tyler, the Creator. It’s Tyler, the Destroyer in this case. As soon as we confirmed the race, the next question was: what is his political party? It became a gender-reveal–style anticipation: what’s gonna come out — red or blue?
That’s how it is in America. We get tense over the political-party reveal of the most recent shooter. Everybody on the right was like, “It’s going to be a leftist — a blue-haired lesbian.” And on the left they were like, “Please, please just make it a regular gun owner. Please, please just make it a normal conservative gun owner.” It turned out to be Tyler — politically ambiguous. People try to spin it both ways. His family is Republican, but he wasn’t necessarily registered Republican. He had some conservative viewpoints and some antifascist, more leftist viewpoints. He dressed all in black, so he’s goth. His shirt had an American flag, so it’s everyone’s fault. He wore Chuck Taylors — kind of 90s gangster—Chucks on the way to kill. Messed up.
Everyone tried to twist the narrative on Tyler. Some said he went to college and was radicalized by leftist professors — but he did one semester during COVID, so really blame the lockdowns if you want a scapegoat. Others guessed he had to be LGBTQ because Charlie Kirk was against that. It turns out he came from a Republican family, so he must be gay — I’m kidding.
His dad turned him in. That’s how you know it’s a white family. Brown kids, we don’t even talk to our parents — my parents didn’t know my girlfriend’s name for three years. But Tyler and his dad were close enough that his dad turned him in. I feel horrible for the parents who discover their kid did this. At least they got him out of the house; older parents know how hard that is. It’s tough to get millennials and Gen Z out.
Here’s where it gets weird: Tyler engraved words onto the casings. As soon as his picture came out, most people’s first thought was, “Not as hot as Luigi.” Luigi is hard to follow for shootings — a legend. But Tyler wrote things on the casings: some antifascist messages, one related to LGBTQ, and one that said, “If you’re reading this, you are gay. LMAO.” That was basically a direct assault on the Utah police — the forensics team on this is Utah police, so take that as you will.
If the casing reads, “If you are reading this, you are gay, LMAO,” it could have been any one of my friends. I don’t know if it’s Brad or Chad, but they love gay jokes. A kid from Tyler’s high school said, “I went to school with Tyler.” He was a Reddit guy. I feel bad for Reddit boys today — a loss for Redditors. If there’s one app contributing to shootings, it’s probably Reddit or 4chan — right up there with 4chan.
Even after identifying Tyler, things stayed suspicious. Immediately when they identified the suspect, the governor of Utah came out saying, “We got him.”
I’m already like, “Okay, that’s very suspicious that he’s so confident they got him.” There’s footage of the event that shows a lot of odd things. If you saw behind Charlie Kirk, some of his bodyguards and people were doing strange hand signals right before it happened—either they were really bad ASL interpreters or they were potentially signaling that something might happen.
People also noted the scope on the rifle the shooter allegedly used, which was found in the bushes, was placed in a weird way. It would have been quite miraculous for someone to make that shot. Others said the scope can get messed up when you drop a rifle. Again, I can’t confirm any of that—I don’t quite have the scope for this, let’s just say.
Another strange thing: shortly after the shooting, a private jet took off 12 minutes down the road from the college, illegally disabled its radar while in the sky, then came back and landed in Provo a couple hours later. They later released the flight log saying, “Oh, it just went to Arizona then came back.” But why disable the radar at just the right time for somebody to potentially do an airdrop? So, yeah—trust the government.
There were other oddities. Netanyahu tweeted a little too soon at the exact same time as Trump—3:02 p.m.—both saying they were praying for Charlie Kirk. Netanyahu tagged Charlie Kirk for some reason; his intern needs to be fired. Shortly after, Netanyahu made a long post about Charlie Kirk saying things like “we all know this was probably done by radical Muslims,” which is weird. Nobody’s out here saying, “Salam, Tyler.” Never met a Muslim named Tyler, buddy.
That was super sus. You have to look into this because a lot of it is circulating right now. In his last weeks, Charlie Kirk confided to one of his best friends that he was afraid Israel might kill him if he turned on them—that’s been said on record. There were a few live interviews where he talked about frustrations with people from Israel turning on him because he was becoming more of a skeptic. Charlie Kirk was very pro-Israel until the last few weeks of his life, when he started showing slight seedlings of an awakening, similar to Candace Owens or Tucker Carlson—who I love, by the way.
I don’t care what you say: Tucker Carlson is doing God’s work right now. He’s reaching a demographic your platforms never would. I don’t care what he said in the past. I’m in love with Tucker Carlson right now. Do not ruin it for me. When he laughs, I come. I love this man.
You could potentially see the seedlings of awakening in Charlie Kirk in these last few weeks: he started to question Mossad’s role in the Epstein files. I’m not going to say much more because I’m also scared. Epste—if you didn’t know—was a creepy guy who enjoyed “massages,” if you know what I mean. He wasn’t good to women; he was a misogynist. Charlie Kirk demanded the release of the Epstein list—Trump does not want that. He was suggesting Epstein might have been intelligence and perhaps working for Mossad. He questioned whether October 7th was an inside job, as some who study the facts now suggest. He told Meghan Kelly he was getting criticism from Israelis and that people in Israel were coming after him. He confided to a friend that he was afraid Israel would kill him. That’s a giant red flag.
Would Israel do an assassination? They’re so busy with genocide right now—I don’t know if they have the time. Rest in peace, JFK. I don’t think they would do something like this, but some people are saying they are. Not me. Not me. Charlie Kirk said he was afraid of Israel. Somebody said Trump expressed similar fears because of how strong AIPAC is in Congress. Charlie Kirk feared Israel. Trump feared Israel. I’m afraid of Israel. The only people not afraid of Israel are Palestinians. Palestinians are the last frontier of people who are not afraid to stand up to Israel.
The irony is this relates to Gaza because of what’s happening there and because of the Epstein files. One day before Charlie Kirk, we were all waiting for the release of the Epstein files—the creepy birthday book had just been released—and everybody was asking, “Where are the files?” Even Charlie was asking. Then boom, it’s over: we’re all focused on Charlie Kirk. While we were paying attention to that case, Congress voted on a measure to not release the Epstein files—the Republicans voted to block release. All while we weren’t paying attention.
I don’t know. It kind of adds up. I do math. It kind of adds up. These are all just conspiracies. It could have just been Tyler.
On one hand, was it Israel and Trump coordinating to cover up the Epstein files, the genocide, and everything going on with the Israel lobby? Or was it just a white guy named Tyler from Utah who said, “You are gay”? I don’t know. I honestly don’t even know anymore.
I already posted a video with my takes on it, and I pissed off a lot of people. Some said, “This is so insensitive to be making jokes at this time”—and these are typically the free-speech people, which is annoying. Then I pissed off leftists who were like, “You’re being too moderate, calling Charlie Kirk a human. He was a Satan Nazi.” Bro, we can’t keep up this divisiveness. The more we preach partisan division, the more it’s going to kill us.
It’s literally like getting shot, your insides spilling out, and you see your intestines for the first time. You think, “Gross,” so you cut them out—only to realize you die without them. Just because something seems foreign, ugly, or different doesn’t mean it isn’t vital to our existence. Don’t try to play God. You’re not a surgeon.
Even though I disagreed with so many things Charlie Kirk said, I respect that he went to schools and engaged in dialogue with people who disagreed with him. I respect that he believed in freedom of speech and was willing to die for it. And I think he manifested the whole thing because he wanted to be a martyr. You could hear it in his tone. He wore a shirt that said “freedom” in his last days.
Yes, he was very pro-Israel for much of his life. But let’s be honest: if he got killed by Israel, he died like a Palestinian. And here’s some irony—if Israel did do this (not saying they did, but if they did), then they technically did two 9/11s. It was 9/10 for you, but it was 9/11 somewhere.
I’m not saying they did that. Of course, if Israel wanted to do that, they would have just bombed the whole school. Don’t kill the messenger. I know this is dark, and we’re all processing in our own ways. But while we’re alive, let’s celebrate life. Enjoy the jokes before they get taken down again.
Thank you so much for coming out. I’ll see you next time. Thank you.
