The Prize, which is named to honor one of the world’s greatest humorists was awarded to Kevin Hart at a gala performance featuring some of the biggest names in comedy at the Kennedy Center on March 24, 2024.
Cast: Kevin Hart, Jerry Seinfeld, Dave Chappelle, Chris Rock, Tiffany Haddish, J.B. Smoove, Nick Cannon, Chelsea Handler, Jimmy Fallon, Regina Hall, Dave Burd
* * *
[jazz band playing Peggy Lee’s “Fever”]
All right, Kevin, let’s do this.
[audience whooping, cheering]
[Kevin Hart] These relationships are genuine.
I’m very fortunate and lucky to have the ones that I have.
[man] Money shot.
[Kevin] And to have them show up on a night like tonight is monumental.
[camera shutter clicking]
[music continues playing]
♪ Never knew how much they loved you ♪
♪ Never knew how much they cared ♪
♪ When you hit them with your talent ♪
♪ They get a fever That’s so hard to bear ♪
♪ You give them fever ♪
♪ When you’re joking ♪
♪ Fever when you hold that mic ♪
♪ Fever at the Garden ♪
♪ Fire burning through the night ♪
♪ You give them fever ♪
♪ When they’re laughing ♪
♪ Fever while you live and learn ♪
♪ Fever when you sizzle ♪
♪ What a lovely way to burn ♪
♪ What a lovely way to burn ♪
♪ What a lovely way ♪
♪ To burn ♪
[cheering and applause]
Good shit, Robin. Good shit.
[upbeat music playing]
Oh, yeah!
It’s time to get hot in here.
Y’all ready to get the party started?
With my boy Nelly!
[audience cheering]
[“Hot In Here” playing]
♪ And a little bit of… Yo ♪
♪ Want a little bit ♪
♪ And a little bit Come on, come on ♪
♪ Good gracious Ass is bodacious ♪
♪ Flirtatious, trying to show faces Waiting for the right time ♪
♪ You know Waiting for the right time ♪
♪ Flash them keys at her ♪
♪ I’m leaving Please believe it ♪
♪ Me and the rest of my heathens ♪
♪ Got it locked At the top of the Four Seasons ♪
♪ Penthouse, roof top, birds I feeding ♪
♪ No deceiving Nothing up my sleeve ♪
♪ No teasing ♪
♪ I need you To get up on the dance floor ♪
♪ Give that man what he asking for ♪
♪ ‘Cause I feel like busting loose And I feel like touching you ♪
♪ Hey, hey And can’t nobody stop the juice ♪
♪ So, baby, tell me what’s the use ♪
♪ I said it’s getting hot in here ♪
♪ So hot ♪
♪ So take off all your clothes ♪
Can’t hear you.
♪ I am getting so hot ♪
♪ I wanna take my clothes off ♪
♪ It’s getting hot in here So take off all your clothes ♪
Ladies.
♪ I am getting so hot ♪
♪ I wanna take my clothes off ♪
♪ Yo With a little bit of… ♪
♪ With a little bit of… ♪
♪ Give a little bit of… With a little bit of… ♪
♪ With a little bit of… And a sprinkle of the… ♪
♪ Get this fired up I like it when you… ♪
♪ Little baby… ♪
♪ Oh ♪
And now… please welcome the recipient
of the 25th Mark Twain Prize for American Humor,
my boy Kevin Hart.
Kevin Hart.
[“Hot In Here” instrumental continues]
[audience cheering]
Thank you.
[exclaims]
How you doing, kid?
You know I love you.
[presenter] He made a movie about Pop-Tarts for some reason.
Please welcome Jerry Seinfeld.
Thank you.
One of the most important things in show business is doing favors.
[laughter]
What you’re looking at right now… is me doing a favor for Kevin Hart.
[laughter]
It’s not that big a favor.
It’s not a nothing favor either.
I wasn’t on my way here anyway.
I was home, comfortable, and now I’m here.
In a suit.
Do you think I’m doing this because I owe Kevin Hart a favor?
Or maybe I like the idea of Kevin Hart owing me a favor.
[laughter]
I’m not gonna tell you.
I can’t think of much Kevin Hart could do for me. Can you?
[laughter]
I don’t wanna be in Jumanji.
[laughter and applause]
If you look at Kevin Hart’s career,
it doesn’t look like it was that hard to do.
[laughter]
All you gotta do is be Kevin Hart and everything just falls into place after that.
How did he get that perfect name? Is that his real name?
It’s unbelievable. The fit of that guy with that name, it’s crazy.
First name’s Kevin. Every Kevin is always a great guy. And then Hart.
He’s the most likable human in world history and his last name is Hart?
Come on. It’s insane.
If he wanted to change his name for show business, he’d have to make it “Kevin Irresistible.”
I personally just absolutely love him.
I love everything he does. It’s funny…
Yes.
[cheering and applause]
Or there’s action, or he’s exercising.
It doesn’t matter, because whatever it is, he’s in it.
That’s the best part.
You see the name Kevin Hart, and there he is, right in that thing, and you go, “Yeah, I wanna watch that.”
People go, “What are you watching?”
You go, “I don’t know, but Kevin Hart is in it.”
And that person sits down next to you and goes, “Okay, I wanna watch it too.”
A few months ago, I saw Kevin speak to a huge roomful of crazy zillionaire super-businessmen at the JP Morgan Conference in Miami.
They just wanted to hear him talk about his business, and they’re already billionaires, and they still wanted to find out, “How the hell are you doing this?”
I was there in the room. I wanted to know.
How the hell is he doing this?
[laughter]
I don’t remember anything he said.
[laughter]
He’s Kevin Hart. That’s how he does it.
But Kevin was wearing this perfect, gorgeous dark suit, and no socks.
This is the Chuck Yeager altitude and velocity he has reached.
His socks are just gone.
[laughter]
I don’t know where they were.
Maybe he put the socks on in the morning,
but because his schedule is so packed, they couldn’t stay on his feet.
It was too much. They just flew off.
I don’t know, but, my God.
Who doesn’t need socks?
[laughter]
I’ll tell you who. Kevin Hart.
Or maybe, since he’s got everything a human being could want or need,
he’s getting rid of stuff everyone else needs
just to show his superiority in that too.
I don’t know.
What I know is I’m excited to be here tonight,
doing a favor for this amazing man.
What else could I do for Kevin Hart?
What would Kevin Hart want to do that he has not already done?
The triumph of tonight
is we at least found something Kevin doesn’t already have.
The Mark Twain Prize.
Yes.
[cheering and applause]
That’s what’s exciting about what’s going to happen tonight.
It feels like we’re finishing
a giant 1,000-piece Kevin Hart jigsaw puzzle.
He did 999 pieces,
and tonight we will all push in the last one,
and get to say “We did it. We finished Kevin Hart.”
1,000 pieces in a box, tonight, a beautiful portrait.
Congratulations, Kevin.
Thank you. I love you, Jerry.
[applause]
I love you. Thank you.
Jerry Seinfeld. Wow.
[imperceptible]
That’s a flex.
The fact that you and Jerry are here, that’s a flex.
Jerry Seinfeld.
The fact that I’m here is a goddamn miracle.
[all laugh]
[J.B. Smoove] You know what? I think what it is is we all show up for each other.
J.B. looks like the manager that’s robbing us.
[all laughing]
[J.B. Smoove] And comics are a unique breed of entertainer.
We’re artists, but we also are the same as anyone else.
We show up based on our relationships with each other.
That’s the life of a comic.
So when people show up for you, they show up for you for a reason.
[Jimmy Fallon] This is a big deal. From the Comic Strip…
Come on, man. Look at you.
…to winning the… Look at you.
Give me a dollar.
The last time we all gathered like this, it was a funeral,
so I’m glad that everybody’s alive this time.
I don’t like going to funerals. It’s not my thing.
Although it is the perfect place to get, you know,
hooked up with a little congalingus.
[presenter] She’s the reason I won’t let my wife go on a girls’ trip.
Tiffany Haddish.
[cheering and applause]
What can I say about Kevin that the Internet hasn’t already said?
He’s a great father, he’s comedically gifted, he’s handsome.
All true, but boring.
All of you think you know Kevin because you follow him on IG,
or because of his movies.
But no one knows Kevin like I do.
I’m his comedic sister.
I get the hand-me-downs from all his specials.
This jacket right here?
[laughter]
This is from Kevin, okay? This is a hand-me-down.
Had to put some shoulder pads in it, femme it up. I femmed it up.
But I have the real tea, okay?
And I am 99.9% sure
that Kevin is really a leprechaun.
[laughter]
Okay? That’s a leprechaun right there. You heard me.
He’s a whimsical, mysterious trickster.
And that’s why he’s a leprechaun,
not because of his height, you low-hanging-fruit motherfuckers.
Kevin is magical. He knows stuff that he shouldn’t know.
He tells me all types of stuff, okay, about my relationships that’s private.
Private stuff.
This one time, okay? I had just started dating this guy.
I hadn’t told anybody.
And Kevin jumps out of the bushes, out of nowhere,
and he goes, “This dude is trash. You can do better.”
Then he clicked his heels and he ran off in his Nikes,
and I swear they had buckles on them. I don’t know how he got Jordan to do it,
but he got Jordan to put buckles on his Nikes.
[laughter]
Then he opened a vegan restaurant.
And I don’t know how he did it.
I don’t know how he did it,
but he made grass taste like chicken.
Have you tried it? It is magically delicious.
And make it… Bah!
It’s so good.
Kevin is mischievous too.
He would tease me all the time when I was a young comic. Ugh!
He knows how hard it is to make it as a stand-up.
And so when he finally started getting money,
he would dangle it, literally, in our faces.
He would hold money just over… Like, in our faces.
Remember when you did this to me, Kevin? Remember when you used to do that?
He’d be like, “If you can catch it, you can have it.”
[laughter]
“If you can catch it, you can have it.”
First it started out with $1. Then it went to $20, then $50.
Then one time he pulled out a $1,000 bill,
and he would drop it like this, and I’d be like…
Do you know how mad I was when he pulled a $1,000 bill out,
and I’m sleeping in my damn car?
I’m still mad. I’m sorry.
I gotta get over it.
‘Cause he had all that money in his pocket like it was Werther’s Originals.
[scattered laughter]
I knew y’all would get that ’cause y’all white.
[laughter]
I was gonna say church lady peppermints, but I knew they wouldn’t understand that.
The biggest reason I think he’s a leprechaun
is because if you capture a leprechaun, it brings you luck.
And, Kevin…
since you’ve been in my life, I have had nothing but good fortune.
Except for the last three years. Where the hell you been?
[Kevin] Okay. All right.
Where the hell you been, man?
All right.
I need some help.
[laughter]
When Kevin started producing, I told him that my wish was to be in a movie,
and Kevin granted it by putting me in Night School.
He has always pushed me…
Yeah. Yes.
[applause]
He has always pushed me to be better, and to never give up.
And it’s because of Kevin that I trusted myself
to follow my rainbow.
And at the end of it was a pot of gold
and 40 hours of community service.
[laughter]
And this is two hours of it, right now. I’m getting two hours off now.
[laughs] I love you, Kevin. You deserve all the success.
You do, and especially this prize tonight.
You are one legendary leprechaun, and I love you to death.
I love you more, Tiff.
Love you back, Tiffany.
[cheering and applause]
A few months ago…
Yeah.
…you had some incident where you ended up in a wheelchair.
Yeah.
Yeah.
And what happened? What accident happened?
I broke my dick.
[studio audience laughs]
I have never heard someone be as open and transparent as you are.
The world of dialogue, communication,
and just openness is what I think I’ve gotten better at.
I’m not a joke teller, I’m a storyteller.
I’m an open book. I tell stories…
[Cameron Diaz] Yeah.
…about me, who I am and what I go through.
It’s very brave.
It’s gonna make me or break me.
This is a true story.
This is not BS. I’m being 1,000% honest right now.
Here’s what happened.
We go to Mexico. We’re on a plane.
While on the plane, my friends love to bring weed, to fly with it.
Go right ahead. Bring all the fucking weed you want.
It’s all fun and games until it’s not.
Them little Mexican dogs get active, and start sniffing your bags.
I don’t want to see you looking up like you don’t know what they smell,
’cause guess what I’m gonna do.
I’m gonna solve the case. That’s what I’m gonna do.
Keith Robinson, he’s the one that told me, “Be honest.”
Go on stage and really talk about my life.
My mom gave me permission to cuss one time.
I’m in school, I’m being bad, my teacher got mad.
Stapled a note to my chest. Said, “Make sure your mother read the note.”
I get home, my mom read the note.
The note said, “Maybe if you showed your son
some more attention at home, he wouldn’t act like a fool in school.”
Right? My mom read the note, said, “Let me tell you something.
“You tell her mind her damn business
before I come down there and I beat her ass.”
I thought, “Okay, do you want me to say it like that,
or do you want me to take some stuff out?”
I wanna say congratulations, ’cause, coming up,
you’re about to be the recipient of the Mark Twain Prize in Comedy.
Yes.
[audience cheering]
Which is a giant honor.
I can’t wait. I’m excited.
As a matter of fact, Jimmy, you’re invited. You got a seat.
I need you there. Yeah.
I’ll be there.
Yup.
I’d love to go. I’d be honored to go.
Yeah.
You have to.
I have stories.
I’ve known you for a long time.
No, I don’t want you to talk.
I want you to come.
Oh.
[“Back in Black” intro music playing]
[presenter] And now here to not talk, Jimmy Fallon.
[cheering and applause]
[music fades]
[mellow music playing]
♪ We all love this little man ♪
[laughter]
♪ He fits in the palm of your hand ♪
♪ Big things come in small packages ♪
♪ I think you understand ♪
♪ We all love this famous Kevin ♪
♪ Even though he’s 2’11” ♪
♪ He’s the boss in any room ♪
♪ But from behind He looks like he’s seven ♪
[laughter]
♪ You can’t stop this funny fella ♪
♪ Every movie’s a best-seller ♪
♪ He can weather any storm ♪
♪ He’ll just grab a cocktail umbrella ♪
[laughter]
♪ Yeah, we gotta give him cred ♪
♪ He’s great at earning bread ♪
♪ And then after a long day of work ♪
♪ He takes doggy stairs to bed… ♪
[laughter]
Hey, no. Come on, Jimmy. Come on, Jimmy.
♪ He’s got a certain flair ♪
♪ Buys his clothes at Build-a-Bear… ♪
[laughter]
What the fuck, Jimmy?
♪ He’s so humble and down to earth ♪
♪ But his feet don’t touch the ground In a chair ♪
[laughter]
♪ We’re so glad that he was born ♪
♪ Makes a full meal out of baby corn ♪
[laughter]
♪ He arrived tonight with The Rock ♪
♪ Who carried him in a Baby Björn ♪
Goddamn it, Jimmy.
[laughter]
Come on, Jimmy.
♪ So much talent How’s it legal? ♪
♪ Entertains millions of people ♪
♪ We would be so heartbroke ♪
♪ If he got carried away by an eagle ♪
Okay, all right.
[laughter]
That’s enough, Jimmy. That’s enough.
Let me finish.
[laughter]
♪ Kevin, you’re hilarious and smart ♪
♪ We loved you from the start ♪
♪ You might be small But everybody knows ♪
♪ That you’ve got the biggest penis ♪
No, Jimmy, no.
[laughter]
Congratulations, Kevin. You deserve it, brother.
[cheering and applause]
[Nick Cannon] To see him reach the levels that he has…
I mean, it’s one award, one prize, one accolade after another,
because he’s reaching levels that no other entertainer has reached before.
I remember when we used to sit and talk about what we wanted with our careers,
and he’s surpassed everything that he’s ever dreamed of.
And now, please help me in welcoming the next speaker.
He made over a billion dollars at the box office,
he’s been in some of your favorite projects,
SNL, Trading Places,
Beverly Hills Cop, Nutty Professor,
Coming to America,
he was nominated for a freaking Oscar in Dreamgirls.
This is a total surprise to Kevin.
Get out your motherfucking seats
for the G-O-A-motherfucking-T,
Eddie Murphy!
[cheering and applause]
[instrumental version of “Crazy Frog” playing]
[Nick] No, no.
No, shut up. Stop.
Eddie Murphy ain’t coming to see your little ass.
[laughter]
Sit your asses down.
I’m sorry.
Got you, bitch.
[all laughing]
I’m sorry. This is personal. I didn’t mean to interrupt the show.
But Kevin Hart came to The Masked Singer last week
and fucked up my show, so now I’m fucking up your show.
[laughter]
Payback. If y’all don’t know, this is my best frenemy right there.
We’ve been having this prank war going on for years.
I sent a llama to his house for his birthday.
In exchange, he put my cell phone number
on every billboard in America, saying…
[laughter]
“For any fatherly advice, call my best friend Nick Cannon.”
My shit’s still ringing.
It’s a good prank.
But this is checkmate, Kevin.
I mean, I’m good. This was hilarious, right? Shit.
They need to be giving me this goddamn award, not you.
But, anyway, Eddie Murphy is not coming.
He’s filming in Atlanta, and he definitely sends his regards.
He loves you like we all do.
So, you know, since Eddie couldn’t be here,
we asked someone just as special to come out,
so please welcome, from Black Panther,
Black Panther 2: Wakanda Forever,
What’s Love Got to Do with It? and Waiting to Exhale,
Angela Bassett!
[cheering and applause]
[laughter]
You fell for that shit too? You don’t even know Angela Bassett, nigga.
Fuck you, man.
[laughter]
I do. I did a movie with her.
Fuck you, Nick.
You gonna be waiting to exhale for her to come out here, nigga.
[laughter]
Sorry. I promise, last one. That’s it. I’m done.
I promise, seriousness now.
All right, y’all know this is really someone I love, true and dearly.
We started in this game together, man,
fronting comedy clubs, making fun of each other.
Freestyle rapping, cracking jokes.
And that’s why I created a little show
to help pay his rent called Wildin’ Out early on.
So that’s, you know…
[cheering]
You did.
But we still rocking to this day.
I love you so much. I love your entire family.
Congratulations, man. You are truly a comedic force.
But don’t worry. You ain’t gotta… Sit your little ass down.
I got a real surprise for you.
Don’t take my word for how amazing this little man is.
Please join me in welcoming to the stage
a comedic legend who needs no introduction.
This brother is truly an icon,
breaking comedy records in specials,
starring all over the world in movies.
I love him, you love him.
Ladies and gentlemen, please welcome Chris Rock.
[cheering and applause]
No, for real, he here.
I’m not lying. Ladies and gentlemen, welcome the legendary Chris Rock.
[upbeat rock music playing]
Wow. Thank you.
That is the funniest I’ve ever seen Nick Cannon.
[laughter]
Wow.
We’re here for Kevin Hart.
Here, the Mark Twain Award, Kevin…
A man of extraordinary talents. Look at him. Look at that smile.
Got that second wife happiness. [laughs]
[laughter]
Ain’t nothing like that second wife happiness.
[chuckles] It’s like, “We didn’t struggle at all.”
[laughter]
Yes. Kevin has made amazing movies.
My favorite movie of Kevin’s is The Upside.
You ever see The Upside?
[scattered applause]
With Kevin and Bryan Cranston.
Kevin’s his helper.
You gotta see it. It’s the best acting Kevin Hart has ever done.
‘Cause in the movie he had to act like he had less money than Bryan Cranston.
[laughter]
It’s unbelievable. He’s like, “Wow. This is a nice house, mister.”
[laughter]
“I never seen a Ferrari before.”
[laughter]
[laughs]
It’s a regular Denzel over there.
Now…
No, seriously. I met Kevin on the set of the movie Death at a Funeral.
Yes, sir. Death at a Funeral, I met Kevin.
I had seen him…
You had a special on Showtime.
And it was a bunch of young comedians and Kevin.
And I think we had, like, a lunch break or something,
and Kevin came up to me and asked for advice.
And I’d seen him and… I don’t know. I gave him some advice, and it’s weird.
He’s the only guy…
Kevin Hart and Aziz Ansari, only guys that ever listened to me.
[chuckles] And he literally did exactly what the fuck I told him.
I looked at him. I said, “Yo, man, you’re really funny.”
“But your problem is you’re competing with these other comedians.”
“They are not your peers. You’re better than all of them.”
“But you need to get out of their circle and develop your own voice.”
That’s what I told him, right? [chuckles]
[applause]
True story.
I swear to God, within 800 days…
Kevin Hart was a bigger star than me.
[laughter]
Within 800 days, he was taking parts from me.
He’s in a movie with The Rock.
My last name’s Rock.
[laughter]
How the fuck he get the fucking part?
From now on, when I see young comedians, they ask me for advice,
I just say, “Shut the fuck up.”
[laughter]
Well, I love Kevin Hart.
I’m glad I’m here tonight.
Enjoy your new wife and kids, bastard.
[laughter]
Y’all take care. Thank you.
[cheering and applause]
Listen, I’m gonna be up here for a while.
I’mma talk about a lot of shit while I’m up here.
Some of the shit I say tonight is gonna be mean.
Let it happen. Unclench your ass.
Have a good time. That’s why you’re here.
[upbeat hip-hop song playing]
My dad never wore drawers ever.
This is my dad getting to his seat. This is all I saw. “Excuse me.”
[laughter]
You’re gonna learn what a long dick looks like today.
Say it with your chest.
Bop, bop! [mimics air horn]
Really?
[hip-hop music continues]
I have amazing friends, man.
I truly believe that I would not be where I am today
if it were not for my support group.
My friends have a lot to do with my level of success.
Over the summer, I took them to Japan.
This shit was incredible. The reason why I was blown away is because…
I was the tallest person in the park. This is a true story.
They were calling me Godzilla. There were like, “Godzilla.”
I was giving advice I’ve never given, telling people to drink milk,
eat their vegetables, shit I’ve never said.
This is a moment. You hear me?
[audience cheering]
It’s a moment.
When you look around this room tonight, what I love the most
is that I see every race, ethnicity, nationality possible.
If you can laugh together, you can live together.
If you can live together, you can love together.
In my city, I made fucking history, goddamn it.
I’m in the record books. You hear me?
[cheering and applause]
[presenter] We know her and love her.
And to be honest, she scares the shit out of me.
Chelsea Handler.
[cheering and applause]
It is such an honor to be here tonight
to pay tribute to America’s favorite comedy dynamo.
I am so glad that Kevin came into my life,
not only because he is an incredibly talented and generous person,
but also because I always wanted to know what it would look like
if 50 Cent and I had a baby.
[laughter]
Okay. All right, Chelsea.
Come on, Chelsea.
Don’t start your shit.
Kevin and I first met on my very first talk show.
It was called Chelsea Lately, and it was clear from the moment we met
that he was destined for superstardom.
Especially when he told me he was destined for superstardom.
And I admired his pluck,
and I’ve continued to admire Kevin’s pluck,
as well as his drive and determination,
and the unrelenting hard work that brought him here tonight,
to a place where the talk show host he told he was destined for superstardom
is now presenting him with a lifetime achievement award.
[applause]
Since everyone here in DC is talking about the border crisis,
I thought I’d talk about a border crisis of my own, and it involves Kevin.
[laughter]
During COVID, I was desperate to get to Canada,
and it was for a very important reason.
I needed to ski.
Chelsea…
And Canada… Shut up, Kevin.
Canada had very strict rules at the time. It was almost impossible to get in.
But when I looked on Instagram,
I noticed that Kevin was filming a movie up in Canada.
And he was going back and forth from Canada to America all the time.
One day, he was in America for Thanksgiving,
and the next day he’d be back in Canada.
And this was when there was a mandatory two-week quarantine.
[Kevin] That’s enough.
[laughter]
So I called Kevin and I told him, “I don’t know what your secret is,
but I need your help getting across the border.”
And here’s how great Kevin is.
He said, “No problem, Chelsea. I got you.”
“I’ll just get you a gig on my movie.”
I said, “Great. Behind the camera, in front.”
“I don’t care. I’ll direct it if I have to.”
He said he’d even help me fill out the paperwork.
I was so excited.
He said, “I got you, Chelsea. I got you. I got you.”
And that’s when I learned that if you ask Kevin for a favor,
you can always count on hearing these three words.
“I got you.”
And then you can count on never hearing from him again.
That’s ridiculous.
[laughter]
So that’s the kind of man we’re honoring here tonight.
[laughter]
The kind of man who would deny a rich white lady
a ski vacation during a global pandemic.
[laughter]
But we’re here to honor Kevin, so I should probably tell one nice story.
I was shooting a documentary for Netflix, and I wanted Kevin to be part of it.
So I reached out to his team. Guess what they said?
Nothing. Nobody responded.
[laughter]
So, the day before the shoot,
I texted Kevin directly, and I told him the situation
and that his team wasn’t getting back to us.
And he said, “Chelsea, I got you.”
[laughter]
But guess what. This time he did get me.
He showed up the next day at 9:00 a.m. on his little scooter
that he drove himself with no entourage, no nothing.
And like always, he delivered.
[applause]
That’s right.
And I love to give him a lot of shit, as we all do,
but he really does show up when it matters.
Which is why all of these amazing and talented people showed up tonight.
And also because he is one giant-hearted, hilariously-funny,
fun-loving, hardworking little motherfucker.
[laughter]
And I got you, Kevin.
So, congratulations.
I love you, Chelsea.
[cheering and applause]
[whooping]
[imperceptible]
Nice to see you.
Good job, buddy.
[presenter] Up next, the man who survived two strokes
just so he could be here tonight.
The hilarious Keith Robinson.
[applause]
[upbeat music playing]
All right. Damn.
Oh… [chuckles]
Shit. They told me I had four minutes.
[laughter]
And it took me three and a half to get down here.
[laughter]
[chuckles]
Kev, I love you. Good night. [laughs]
[laughter]
Fucking damn… Damn Chris Rock.
Calls me Strokey Robinson.
[laughter]
He’s an asshole, man.
[laughter]
[Keith laughs]
[Kevin laughs]
I met Kev…
Like, I met him around ’98, ’99, at the Laff House.
I met two guys, actually.
Big Jay Oakerson, and little dummy, the bastard.
[laughter]
Kevin Hart. You know what I mean?
And I decided to take these guys to New York in my ’85 Buick.
But those assholes tried to play brand-new music in my old-ass car.
[scattered laughter]
[chuckles]
They put Jadakiss in, Jay-Z. Fat Joe.
I plopped it out of my CD, threw it right out the fucking window.
[laughter]
And I made them listen to Mahalia Jackson.
[laughter]
I’m looking in my rearview, and they’re, like, disgusted.
Like, “What the fuck?” [chuckles]
[laughter]
But as we went along, man, Kev, little dummy,
he made a tape. I told him, “Get a tape.” He sent down his tape.
And he got some manager prospects.
He got two of them so far.
And I said, “Look, don’t you sign with nobody.”
“Don’t do it. I’ll tell you who to sign with.”
And finally he came to me with Dave Becky.
Well, I told Kev, “That’s the guy. Sign with him.”
“But you have to break up with the other two managers.”
So Kev called one of the managers and he said, “Hey…”
Kev is real good at bullshitting, right?
[laughter]
He said, “I mean, thank you for all you’ve done. You know…”
[laughter]
“Everything was good.”
“But, you know, I’m gonna go with Dave Becky.”
The first one, like, “Okay. God bless you. Have a good time.”
All right. He called the second one.
Same bullshit. You know, “You were very good.”
And the woman’s like, “Whoa, whoa, whoa. What the fuck you talking about?”
[laughter]
And Kev said, “No, I’m gonna go with Dave Becky.”
Swear to God, she’s saying, “You little Black midget motherfucker.”
[laughter]
“You midget motherfucker.”
“I’m gonna put my foot in your ass.” [laughs]
[laughter]
“Don’t let me see you.” I’m like, “Oh, shit.”
And I swear to God, like, two weeks later, Kev called me
and told me he was moving to LA.
I’m like, “What the fuck? She scared you that much?”
[laughter]
Dealing with Kev… I love him to death. He’s my family now.
I remember when I had my stroke, right?
I was in the hospital, right during COVID.
And all of a sudden, they took me to the COVID holding center.
Like, they put me there
and were like, “We’re gonna put you in the COVID section.”
I’m like, “Oh, shit.”
My kid’s mom called me, and I said, “Look, call Kevin.”
She said, “What?” I said, “Call Kevin.”
And I said, “Kev, they gonna put me in the COVID section.”
And Kev bullshitting… “What? That’s bullshit.”
[Kevin laughing loudly]
[laughter]
I’m like, “Yeah, they gonna put me there, man.”
He said, “Let me make a call.”
I’m like, “Yeah, now they got action.”
[laughter]
He said, “I’ll call you back in ten minutes.”
I’m like, “Goddamn right.”
[laughter]
And then when he hung up the phone, I’m like, “Wait a minute.”
“Who the fuck is he… [chuckles] Who’s he gonna call?”
[laughter]
[chuckles]
Dr. Fauci? What the fuck?
[laughter]
[laughing]
And when I finally got out of that bullshit, I’m like,
“You Black midget motherfucker.”
[laughter]
[cheering and applause]
[Kevin] Yes. Oh!
Oh, my God.
[Keith chuckling]
I’m still mad, by the way.
[laughter]
Oh, shit.
[laughter]
My cane just fell.
I need help.
[laughter]
I need help, goddamn it.
[laughter]
My man.
There you go, man.
There you go.
Adam Blackstone, man. How about it?
[laughter]
Adam… Oh!
[cheering and applause]
[laughter]
Hey, Adam, give him his cane.
[laughter]
I’m sorry, man. You know, that was wrong. That was wrong.
[laughter]
Kevin, I love you, man. This is a good thing for you.
I love you to death. This is very special, man.
I really do. Your family watching you all sitting there.
Your son, your daughter, your son, your daughter… [chuckles]
[laughter]
No more, man. No more kids.
[laughter]
All right, love you, man. Peace out. Take care.
[cheering and applause]
[upbeat music playing]
[presenter] I can’t believe we have two people
from the cast of Pootie Tang here tonight.
Let’s hear it for the hilarious J.B. Smoove.
[cheering and applause]
[upbeat music playing]
[whoops]
[J.B. Smoove] All right.
Kevin Hart, man. Look at you, baby.
How you doing?
I’m doing great, man.
Not as great as you, but you’re doing… You’re amazing, man.
Kevin and I go way back, man. I’m a little older than Kevin.
But I can remember Kevin always being at the Laugh House in Philadelphia, man.
I would see this kid at the club with these little beady eyes.
I’d be like, “Man, if someone doesn’t come over here
and get their damn child out of this club… They sell alcohol in here.”
“Who brings an adolescent to a damn comedy club?”
But it wasn’t an adolescent at all.
[laughter]
It was Kevin.
Back then he was damn near living at that club, sitting in the back,
taking notes, soaking it all in,
pestering anyone who would want to speak to his ass.
I remember how we would sit and talk about comedy
before I got up to do my set, and I also remember how,
after I would leave the club headed back to New York City,
I wouldn’t even make it over the Ben Franklin Bridge
before I would get a page causing me to pull over
and find a damn pay phone and call my answering service
just so the operator could relay the message
that Kevin was on stage stealing my shit again.
Okay. All right. That’s…
I ain’t lying.
[laughter]
I said, “Thank you, operator Jenny, for the information.”
[laughter]
It’s been so long ago,
I don’t actually remember all the bits that Kevin borrowed.
The point is that he borrowed jokes.
But see, jokes don’t don’t make an act.
I like to think of comedians as chefs.
Some make gourmet meals and some make fast food.
But whatever they make, it’s their recipe.
And figuring out the right ingredients takes time.
Kevin had to figure out all the right ingredients.
Over the years, I’ve watched Kevin go from being a short short-order cook,
burning curly fries…
[laughter]
to an even shorter Michelin-Star chef.
I’ve watched him go from sitting in the back of the small clubs in Philly
to standing on stage at arenas around the damn world.
And how did he do it, you ask? It was simple.
By just being himself.
And maybe a little bit of me.
Maybe a little bit of me, but mostly by being his damn self.
I remember on his last tour, Kevin invited my wife, Shahidah,
to go see him at the Barclays Center in Brooklyn, New York.
Of course, that man killed. That man destroyed that crowd.
I was like, “This is my city. And you come up here and do this?”
I said, “Man, that boy bad as hell, man.”
But after the show, I was backstage.
Kevin came over and thanked me for coming to the show.
And that it meant so much for me to come in my own city to see him perform.
The man started crying. I couldn’t believe it.
That’s the Kevin people don’t know. He’s very emotional.
He started crying right there. You should’ve saw those damn tears.
This man started crying chocolate milk. Like, it was dark.
[laughter]
I’ve never seen tears that dark in my life.
It had the consistency of a smoothie.
Thick-ass tears, like he was crying Ovaltine.
I don’t know what was going on with this dude.
I know folks make short jokes about Kevin, and rightfully so.
[laughter]
But the truth is, Kevin is a giant. A miniature damn giant.
[laughter]
I’m gonna thank you, man, for letting me, you know,
get all this out of my system, man.
‘Cause you know how it was back then. We were all trying to get somewhere, man.
And that’s what this comedy game is.
And, Kevin, I want you to know, man, that it’s all love, baby.
It’s all love, brother. You know why I’m here.
It’s all love. I love you, man.
[cheering and applause]
Congratulations, Kevin. You deserve this, brother.
I love you so much, man.
I’m so proud of your journey, ’cause I’ve seen it from the beginning.
I love you, man. Give me a hug. Come on, man.
Come on, man.
I love you, brother.
How you doing? Congratulations.
Are you ready to have your mind blown?
I’m ready. I’m so ready.
Anything is possible! [exclaims]
Oh, God. He’s doing that thing with his voice.
Do you ever listen to the shit that fly out your mouth?
Use your regular voice.
[deep voice] This is my regular voice.
Hey, Mike. How old is your mom?
What?
No, not like that. No, it is. It is like that.
How old is she? I come in, she was like, “You wanna eat?” “Eat what?”
My action star group chat. Me, Tom Cruise, Harrison Ford, Jet Li.
We all talk.
You barely have the Rock’s number.
You barely have The Rock’s number.
First of all, I say this, and I say it respectfully, fuck The Rock.
Back up, man.
[yells]
Got a bad feeling about this.
You’re telling me that you let a rabbit shit in his bed
because part of…
Let me stop you right there.
That wasn’t a rabbit. That was my shit.
You’re proud of that?
[grunts]
I’m taking you into custody.
I do love you.
What’re you doing?
I’m about to kiss you.
Nobody said anything about a kiss.
[laughs triumphantly]
I’m gonna go check the perimeter.
Am I still Black?
Yes.
Okay.
All right. We’re fine. Everything is fine.
Yeah. Hey, it’s all good.
[explosion]
[people scream, exclaim]
[presenter] From About Last Night with Kevin Hart,
but more importantly, she did Shaft with me,
please welcome Regina Hall.
[upbeat music playing]
Um…
Thank you.
You know, I’m really disappointed
because tonight is a celebration of Kevin’s life and career,
and I’ve been hearing a lot of negative things.
I’ve been hearing about his inconsistent communication,
how he’s got a big penis, and these are lies.
No.
Kevin. No, no, no.
I’m not gonna deal with it. I won’t have the lies.
Kevin, look at me. This is your work wife. And I’m here, to the rescue, for you.
Thank you.
Look, I love you.
I got us. There’s my sister wife, Eniko. Beautiful.
Everybody, we are the Harts, this family right here.
[laughter]
Now this right here, this is Scary Movie 3.
This is where it all began. I was 21.
Who could have known that I would walk into a table read
and meet my future work husband?
Since then, Kevin’s career, it skyrocketed.
Everyone… No one saw it coming. But one person did.
It wasn’t me. No. I didn’t see it at all.
[laughter]
To be honest, after Soul Plane,
a movie that I’m sure no one in here saw…
[laughter]
Yeah, right? Probably.
Never heard of it either, huh? Yeah, it’s okay. [clears throat] It’s okay.
A lot of people have erased that from their memories. I did.
And I erased Kevin from my cell phone.
[laughter]
But it’s fine, because, over the years, Kevin has tirelessly proven himself
to be a bona fide movie star, with more than 60 films and counting.
Eight of which we have starred in together.
Nice.
And our love scenes… Kevin and I had many love scenes, some requested by Kevin,
actually, most requested by Niko.
[laughter]
Okay. All right.
Yeah. She told me she was tired of it. I mean…
[laughter]
Over the course of our friendship, I can attest to the fact
that Kevin has remained as kind and gracious since day one.
It’s true.
What’s also true is Kevin is such an incredible father to his children.
He is an exceptional family man.
You hear that?
He manages to do…
It’s true. You do it all.
Your sacrifice, your perseverance, your work ethic.
It is comparable to no other because Kevin cares.
Kevin really cares about the quality… of the check, not the project.
[laughter]
He doesn’t give a damn about that. Some of that shit is pretty bad.
But you know what?
This man makes a lot of money.
Now, it’s been more than 20 years since we met,
and at this point, in California, we are actually common law.
Now, what that means is that I am entitled to…
Lookie there. Oh, my God. It’s legal.
[laughter]
I’m actually entitled to half of the Hart empire.
Okay.
If Kevin owns it, if he gets paid for it, so do I.
Being the work wife is a great responsibility.
And behind every successful Kevin Hart,
there is a gold-digging Regina Hall-Hart.
[laughter]
And I mean that, Kevin.
Congratulations on this incredibly tremendous honor.
And I love you so much.
I love you, G.
[cheering and applause]
[Lil Dicky] Even just looking at the people
that are here in general,
to just be in the same company as these idols
who, my whole life, have been my biggest influences…
I love you.
I love you too, bro.
And for him to invite me to be a part of that is just…
He’s always been, to me, the funniest man in the world.
So I love being here to give him his flowers that are so deserved.
All right.
[presenter] Please welcome Lil Dicky.
[cheering and applause]
I actually want to tell a true story about the first day that I met Kevin Hart,
because I think it’s very telling about his personality.
I’m a rapper, and I was booked to perform in Las Vegas
at one of those super trashy daytime generic Las Vegas pool parties.
That’s where Kevin Hart decided to have his actual bachelor party.
I think he just likes being around those lowest common denominator
type of people that love all his movies.
I think he just likes that vibe.
[laughter]
I don’t know why he was there. Anyways, I hadn’t even met him yet.
I was on stage rapping.
You know, really in the zone. I heard the crowd roar all of a sudden.
I assumed it must have been because I had done something cool.
But I turned right and no,
it was actually because Kevin Hart jumped on stage, microphone in hand,
and actually performed with me for the entire duration of the show.
Look, I grew up in Philadelphia idolizing this man,
so it was a total dream come true
to have this guy materialize out of thin air and meet him on the stage.
Very cool moment in my life.
As years went by, I took a step back
and really analyzed what actually occurred that day.
The audacity of a man…
[laughter]
…having never met the performer,
to just assume that everyone wants him to just jump on stage and interact.
It’s a totally ridiculous way to carry yourself and live life.
I don’t know how he gets away with it, but he does. And it’s incredible.
And he was right. He jumped on stage,
everybody went nuts and the rest is history.
He actually went on to executive produce my TV show.
Now he makes even more money,
and he’s had his hand in my pockets ever since.
[laughter]
Seriously, though, Kevin, I really did grow up in Philadelphia,
and there’s not many comedians or entertainers
where you remember the moment where you saw them the first time,
but I actually I remember sitting at my friend Chris Claffey’s basement.
You came on the screen and you were that dynamic and incredible.
And you’re one of the true comedians
who actually paves the way for everyone after him.
I can speak to that because you did it to me,
and you opened doors and you didn’t have to do that.
So, yeah.
Wow. I love you.
[applause]
I thought it would only be fitting to perform that song that you came on stage.
It’s called “$ave Dat Money.”
One time.
This is for Kevin Hart.
Everyone stand up.
Stand up. This isn’t a medical.
Hands up.
This is not a medical. Stand up.
Hands up.
Hands up.
Hands up.
[“$ave Dat Money” playing]
♪ Where the gold at, baby? ♪
♪ Where the clothes at? ♪
♪ Where the dough at, baby? ♪
♪ Let’s go ♪
♪ One, two, one, two, three Let’s go ♪
♪ We gonna save that what? We gonna save that money ♪
♪ We gonna save that what? We gonna save that money ♪
♪ We gonna save that what? We gonna save that money ♪
♪ Hey, hey, hey ♪
♪ The rap game got it all wrong ♪
♪ We ain’t about to go And spend money just to flex on them ♪
♪ We ain’t really got it like y’all ♪
♪ Nah ♪
♪ I’m the type of motherfucker That’ll check the check ♪
♪ Do the math I ain’t never getting robbed ♪
♪ Those margaritas not going on my card ♪
♪ Yeah ♪
♪ I ain’t about to split a damn thing For convenience ♪
♪ I’m at the restaurant Working that waitress ♪
♪ You ain’t heard of Lil Dave Yung L the Jew biz major? ♪
♪ Fuck you know about The world he raised in? ♪
♪ I’ve been saving money Since a motherfucker 13 ♪
♪ I wear the same pair of jeans Every day ♪
♪ Free sandwiches, homie Two stamps away ♪
♪ Book flight December But I leave in May ♪
♪ Drugs are generic But still work the same ♪
♪ I get logins for Netflix From my cousin Greg ♪
♪ Thanks, Greg ♪
♪ One, two, one, two, three Let’s… ♪
♪ We gonna save that what? ♪
♪ We gonna save that money ♪
♪ We gonna save that what? ♪
♪ We gonna save that money ♪
♪ We gonna save that what? ♪
♪ We gonna save that money ♪
♪ We gonna save that money ♪
I love you so much, man.
I love you more.
You deserve all this.
I love you more.
You deserve all of this.
I love you more.
[cheering and applause]
Lil Dicky.
[music continues]
You crushed it, Adam.
[cheering and applause]
[music fades]
Please welcome Kevin Hart and the Plastic Cup Boyz.
[Kevin] The Plastic Cup Boyz. That’s our group.
If we were a club, that would’ve been the name of our club house.
I don’t do this show by myself.
Always with my boys, my friends, my brothers.
The group you keep around you is a representation of who you are.
I’ll get it right now.
Y’all leave him alone.
We’re together actually more than we are with our real families.
You can’t do it by yourself. You know, you need a team.
[presenter] Give it up for the Plastic Cup Boyz.
[cheering and applause]
Yes. Yes. How y’all this evening? How is everybody?
We have been touring… I don’t know if y’all believe this.
We’ve been touring with Kevin for 17 years.
[man] Same thing.
A lot of y’all don’t know us because we’re Black famous.
If it was the BET, we’d be popping right now.
[man] Hey, this thing out of control on BET.
All jokes aside, there’s nothing Kevin loves more than being a father.
Yes, sir.
Especially when we’re on tour. You only got to do FaceTime.
Yeah.
[laughter]
What’s that?
No.
As you can see, we are a group.
Now, Kevin is the lead, and he is the Michael Jackson of this group.
But like every group, we have a malcontent.
Ladies and gentlemen, Jermaine Jackson.
There it is.
[laughter]
There he is.
They call me the Bobby Brown of the crew,
the David Ruffin, the one that wants to go solo.
But that is a reflection of your leadership.
If your leader doesn’t bring out the hunger
for more within yourself, is he truly a leader?
Or is he an enabler for mediocrity? For example, Joey and Spank.
[laughter]
I see the greatness in myself because I see the greatness in you.
Love you, bro.
Love you back.
So, tonight, there have been a lot of jokes about Kevin.
We’ve heard all of them, all the short jokes and everything,
and no one appreciates a joke more than Kevin.
So on behalf of the Plastic Cup Boyz,
everybody raise your cup.
Yes. Good job.
To the man who makes the greatest tequila in the world…
George Clooney.
[laughter]
From our hearts…
to Kevin Hart.
Brother, we truly love you and this is well deserved.
Congratulations, my friend. Everybody.
Congratulations.
[cheering and applause]
Cheers!
[upbeat music playing]
Thanks.
Thanks.
[indistinct chatter, laughter]
[audience cheering]
[Kevin] Humor has acted as the master key to every door that I went through.
You don’t just have to do one thing.
You can be good at a lot of different things.
Another day, another shoot.
[director] Ready. And action.
You don’t stop.
I don’t.
What up, everybody? What up, world?
You don’t know that you’re good at a lot of different things
unless you try a lot of different things.
Really, Supreme Court?
Don’t think that you can call… Don’t think that can’t call…
Damn it, Kevin. I got it.
See, the beauty of life is you live and you learn.
Right now, I’m living, but I’m still learning.
Congrats on the Grammy nom, by the way.
That was good, man.
Thank you.
You get one life.
You have the opportunity to take care of yourself
and live that life to the fullest.
Dream, boy.
Education.
You shouldn’t be afraid to be who you are.
This is going to be epic.
Lock in, embody and embed the space of confidence for others.
I did my part.
You are the big guy.
Self-confidence and belief.
That’s how dreams get met.
[upbeat music playing]
[applause]
[presenter] If this presenter’s speech passes a lot of time,
it technically counts for another Netflix special.
Please welcome Dave Chappelle.
[cheering and applause]
[Dave] Thank you.
Kevin, this is a strange thing.
To get a prize like that while you’re still active duty.
But I got to tell you something, man.
Everyone keeps saying you deserve it. What the fuck does that mean?
[laughter]
My God, of course you do.
Kevin Hart grew up in Philadelphia and endured poverty in his childhood.
And if survival had a mascot, it would be him.
He looks like “Staying Alive.”
A little guy in North Philadelphia.
[laughter]
Strong but probably can’t fight.
[laughter]
And survive with humor.
And levity.
If you knew what he was in our community,
you’d know why everybody pulled up to be here tonight.
He makes me feel like the world is okay.
He’s always optimistic.
Comedy is tough and comedians are awful, awful human beings.
[laughter]
[laughs]
But never you.
You always come to any situation
and make us feel levity and light, and you remind me, personally,
every time I see you, why I love comedy so much.
Nobody gives you the credit you deserve
for how outstanding of a comedian you are.
[cheering and applause]
Kevin, what you’ve achieved in your career
is not even scratching the surface of who you are.
You are very, not only deserving of this award,
but people don’t understand what you’ve done to the business.
Do you know how many tickets you’ve sold since you started doing concerts?
I called and checked. I know too.
[laughter]
A half a billion.
A half a billion people…
[applause]
…watched this man stand in front of them
and make them laugh.
Kevin is one of the greatest comedians that I’ve ever seen.
And Kevin is one of the greatest men that I’ve ever known.
Hello, Jerry.
[laughter]
You bring joy to our environment.
People don’t know all the things that comedians go through
and how difficult, how heavy it is to wear the crown.
But, man, I swear to God, you do it with so much grace, so much kindness.
Man, I know every story of all the comedians that you help out.
I know how you go back to Philadelphia and support your neighborhood.
And I know that inside, you feel awful sometimes,
but I’ve never seen it on your face and I’ve never felt it in your presence.
And I am honored to know somebody like you.
I really wish you had come when I won this award.
[laughter]
[cheering and applause]
No, no, no. Niggas was busy.
[laughter]
I said it about myself but it’s true…
about many of my colleagues, all of my colleagues here tonight.
In your life, at any given moment,
the strongest dream in that moment wins that moment.
And my God, Kevin Hart,
you are a very powerful dreamer.
I love you so much,
and never forget that I said it, because we only get to talk on podcasts.
[laughter]
[laughs] I’m fucking with you.
If you call your brother, I’ll come running.
And you deserve that. And you have earned that.
And you have earned this.
What you have done for this genre is unmistakable.
For the first time in my life, I played arenas with Chris Rock.
And I would never play an arena before I saw you do it.
You made me dream bigger and you’re younger than me. It’s humiliating.
[laughter]
But it’s inspiring, man.
I hope that this moment means the world to you.
And I got to tell you one story.
When I quit Chappelle’s Show, the hardest part about it…
Not the hardest, but a hard part about it
was that I had to watch the world go on without me.
And after some time, I got used to it.
And one day,
my son came home and was looking at me like I was crazy.
And I said, “What is that look in your face?”
And he said, “Kevin Hart just said in an interview
that you were one of the greatest comedians that ever lived.”
And I was like, “Yeah.” But in my mind I was like, “He did?”
[laughter]
[chuckles]
And I thought to myself, if I ever had a chance to honor you
in front of your family, boy, I’ll come running.
I just wish it wasn’t this Sunday ’cause I was supposed to be in Jamaica.
[laughter]
Kevin, you make me dream bigger.
You inspire me and you remind me why I love the love of my life.
This genre. The way you approach it is masterful.
And you are one of the GOATs of the game.
From the bottom of my heart, thank you.
Please make some noise for the most recent recipient
of the Mark Twain Prize.
Kevin Hart.
[cheering and applause]
Let’s go.
[upbeat music playing]
[cheering, applause continues]
[presenter] Please welcome the chairman of the Kennedy Center, David Rubenstein.
How many of you would like to follow Dave Chappelle?
[laughter]
Not easy.
[applause]
If Mark Twain were here today, he might not fully understand
the significance of what is happening tonight.
But that is because he would be 214 years old.
[laughter]
Just about the age when he could run for president.
[laughter]
[applause]
On the night of the very first prize ceremony,
Kevin Hart was 19 years old.
Perhaps he watched Richard Pryor receive that first prize.
Perhaps he was at a comedy club that night,
starting out on a journey that has led to this stage tonight.
I suspect he couldn’t imagine back then that he would end up here.
But he deserves this in so many ways,
for his impact on our society is immeasurable.
In everything Kevin does,
whether on television or in films, in small comedy clubs or giant stadiums,
he has made us laugh.
It is my great honor to present the 2024 Mark Twain Prize
for American Humor to Kevin Hart.
[cheering and applause]
[upbeat music playing]
[audience cheering]
Wow.
First and foremost, before I say anything, man, I gotta do a rundown of…
just my friends.
I want to shout out Nelly, Robin Thicke,
I want to shout out Tiffany Haddish,
Chelsea Handler, Chris Rock, Jerry Seinfeld, Dave Chappelle…
[applause]
Keith Robinson, the Plastic Cup Boyz.
They all graced the stage tonight.
And the reason why I start off here
before I get into the real side of my speech is,
you know, success is nothing without the people that really know you
and that can understand what you’ve been through.
And I’ll get to more of that in a second.
But to those people to show up tonight, there’s value in that.
And I appreciate it.
[Nick] You forgot me, motherfucker.
[laughter]
Hey, me too. Hey, me too.
By the way…
Okay.
Kevin.
[laughter]
By the way, here’s the big thing.
Me.
You think it was an accident…
Fuck you, Nick.
[laughter]
Okay?
I really thought Eddie Murphy was here. Fuck you, Nick.
If you don’t think I’mma cut my reaction out from…
[laughter]
And you going… Fuck you, Nick Cannon.
And, J.B., you told everybody I stole my style from you.
Fuck you, J.B.
[laughter]
Tonight is celebration. I left all that out.
And you know what? You did exactly what I did.
The face I had, you both had.
[laughter]
Yeah, yeah. Fuck you both. That’s right.
Now back to the real shit.
[laughter]
It’s a night of love. It’s a night of love.
[laughter]
So anything outside of love is not tolerated tonight.
That’s not what we’re gonna deal with.
On a serious note, jokes aside…
You can’t buy support. You can’t fake that.
So tonight is special, not just because of the award,
but it’s ’cause of the support.
So I want to say before I say anything else…
Regina, fuck. Like…
it means so much to see the people that I would show up for show up for me.
It’s value.
And for me right now, I want you to make sure you feel that
and you understand that. So all jokes aside,
thank you for showing up on a night that’s so dope
that could not be as dope
without real relationships and real energy.
But I got real shit over there to that side,
and I got real shit over here to this side.
So with that being said, like…
Thank you for showing up. Keith…
Goddamn, man. People don’t really know who you are or what you are to me.
[cheering and applause]
They don’t know.
They don’t know.
We’re gonna do a hell of an edit to get you to the stage faster.
[laughter]
It’s gonna be faster. It’s gonna look good.
And I’mma fucking… That’s Keith.
I got you. Chelsea.
[laughter]
I’m gonna handle it, Keith.
I’m gonna get you there faster.
Thank God.
God makes me realize how important my mom was,
’cause my mom made me realize how important God was.
‘Cause my mom planned on leaving at a certain time,
and God was gonna have to be the person that I leaned on and tapped into.
So thank you, God, for making my mom who she was
and making my mom embed what she embedded in me.
I want to thank my fucking dad. Right?
[applause]
I want to thank my dad too.
I don’t show my dad a lot of love often.
My mom and my dad aren’t here.
My mom made me understand the value of self.
And the message was that I’m a good kid,
I’m a great kid, and I can do whatever I wanna do
and be whatever I want to be. I believed it.
Some kids don’t. I did.
And holding on to that helped me, like…
basically mold into the person I am today and meet the people that I met.
I didn’t start doing what I started to do to get the awards.
I fell in love with the idea of comedy,
and falling in love with the idea of comedy made me say, “Oh, my God.”
“I’m in love with something that I can do for the rest of my life.” That’s the win.
I fell in love with something that I could adapt to,
I can grab on to, and I can keep.
I got good at it.
And getting good at it,
I figured out more ways to amplify it and get bigger and better.
To people watching this shit tonight, man, it’s not about the award.
It’s about the idea of happy with you.
It’s about the idea of happy with the thing that you understand
and the thing that you committed to.
I committed to comedy.
I committed to saying that it’s either this or nothing else.
All my eggs are in this basket.
Whether it works or not, I’m happy with my choice.
Oh, my God. My choice ended up becoming so much more than I ever saw it becoming.
But it’s because I was able to say it’s either this or nothing else.
Now, that gamble was one that I was willing to live with.
And my lesson to all that are watching or that will watch…
Some people frown upon gambling.
Life without a gamble is a weird thing, man.
‘Cause that’s acting as if you know. You don’t know.
You don’t know what the fuck will work.
You don’t know what your future will be.
You don’t have the answers.
So sometimes a gamble is the best way to define what will be you
or ultimately become the best version of you.
I’m an example of gambles good and bad.
I’ve won and I’ve lost.
But there is no bigger win
than the win of choice.
I made the right choice,
and the right choice led me to the right fucking household.
My wife, my kids, my foundation.
I can’t do what I do without the right foundation.
So to my wife, I love you for being patient
with my goddamn lack of consistency and choice,
but ultimately believing that I will do the right thing.
To my kids, for understanding that their dad is gonna be exactly that.
I’m your dad.
There is no me without you.
There is no life in me… [voice breaking]
without you.
I breathe for you. I live for you.
[applause]
To my brother…
Man, I don’t have the words for my brother.
I don’t have the words for a better person.
A better support.
A better uncle.
A better fucking backbone.
Parents fall, you stood up.
Parents got sick, you stood up.
Within all the choices I made,
you made the right choice to say I’mma be there…
and I’mma ride for my brother because my brother ultimately is riding for us.
And that last name Hart will mean so much
’cause of your commitment.
And I hate to use this word in front of all these Congress white people,
but, nigga, you’re the best.
[laughter]
You’re the best.
You’re the best.
And… my kids are better because of you.
To Dave, to Chris, to Jerry.
Hey, man, I’m a student of comedy.
And when you get the greats to come out and support you in any way, shape or form, it makes you feel like you’re doing great shit.
I canceled plans.
[laughter]
It makes you feel like you’re doing great shit.
And although this award means so much and I will never take it for granted, it does not mean more than looking over there and going,
“Wow. I got Jerry Seinfeld, Chris Rock, and Dave Chappelle that came out on a night for me.”
[cheering and applause]
Uh…
There is nothing…
There is nothing that can mean more than that.
And… I don’t want to get too emotional, but my emotions simply come from a format of “I’m not supposed to be here.”
So when you get here and you’re an example that you can be here, you’re just fucking what the dream is about.
My dream is real, and my dream doesn’t stop today.
My dream is amplified more.
My tears come down because my kids get to see it.
Tonight is amazing, and I appreciate the support.
There’s no definition to describe how that feels.
And tonight you guys gave me a feeling of that.
Like I say, it’s my first time in this business that I’ve seen the people that I really admire step up and show out when there was an opportunity to.
And I don’t know if this opportunity will come again.
This may be the last.
But if it was… you made it impactful, you made it meaningful.
‘Cause you did it in front of me and mines.
And I thank you forever for that.
So I accept this award and, more importantly, I love you.
Thank you, guys, for an amazing night.
I love you all. Thank you, guys.
[cheering and applause]
[upbeat music playing]
[camera shutter clicking]
[imperceptible]
